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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Original poster

TTC twins, any experiences, advice? Please come and talk to me.

24 replies

bahia · 25/01/2009 07:15

My dh and I have one baby which was delivered by CS. The surgery was awful and I'm still not over the pain I felt and the long and painful recovery. Since my dh is also significantly older than I am, we'd like to see only one more pregnancy through. I'd love to have twins so I can complete my dream of a family.

Are there drugs which I can take to make sure/encourage a twin pregnancy? Can you select the sex or do you just get lucky. I'm curious but haven't approached a doctor yet.

Has anyone been through this or know someone who did?

OP posts:
PuzzleRocks · 25/01/2009 14:24

Bumping for you.

Original poster
bahia · 25/01/2009 22:57

Thank you PR.

Just thought there may be others that can help re this. Fertility treatment still increases the chance to have multiple eggs, no? I am determined to go ahead with this for various reasons but would appreciate if anyone on MN can share experiences or give tipps.

OP posts:
christiana · 25/01/2009 23:06

Message withdrawn

Original poster
bahia · 25/01/2009 23:27

hi Christiana, my dd is just 5 mths. I am asking now because I'd like to build up my knowledge about this and review my wish in about 2-3 years when it comes down to it.

I am aware of the fact that men can have children till their ripe old age but he'd also like to see them grow up.

OP posts:
thisisyesterday · 25/01/2009 23:30

bahia, have youi spoken to anyone about your birth experience? it sounds liek you could do with a de-briefing, or even a counselling session to come to terms with the birth. i know other mumsnetters have found this helpful after a traumatic birth

as for the rest, I am afraid I agree with christiana!
pretty sure no-one would give you fertility treatment just because you want twins. and even if they did IVF has something like a 20% chance of working, and you are not guaranteed a multiple birth by a long stretch.

luckylady74 · 25/01/2009 23:39

They also try to limit the number of children in ivf pregnancy for other reasons. Recently there have been moves to limit the number of embryos implanted to 1 because of the strain that having a multple children puts on the parents emotionally- ie their marriages are more likely to break down.
I had twins through ivf as well as my eldest ds1. I had ivf because I am infertile. I feel uncomfortable with the idea of someone wanting ivf for reasons other than infertility. I find the idea of selcting for sex really outrageous too!
My dh is also a lot older than me, but 2 yrs say between singletons does not make that much difference even at 60 or whatever..As christiana said we need to hear more of your reasons.
Your chance of a csection does increase with twins too.

Original poster
bahia · 26/01/2009 00:03

TBH, I've never thought of counselling for the birth I had. I didn't know others have done this. I'm very new to MN so will have to find my way around. Thank you TIY, I'll look around the different topics.

lucky, however much I appreciate your difficulties of conceiving and the stress you've been through I (politely) ask you to keep your judgement to yourself. Whatever you feel comfortable or uncomfortable with is really nothing to do with me. I have as much the right to ask questions on this board as you have and I deserve not to be judged or having to defend myself for my choices just as I don't critisize you. Cheers.

Just because I'm looking for answers doesn't mean I need to explain more about my background. I've given all that's relevant to the question.

I'd like to have twins, selective and wonder if anyone has been through this and can share the experience with me. Thank you.

OP posts:
modernart · 26/01/2009 00:47

You can't have twins selectively, you don't get to choose.

And if you found a CS difficult are you sure you would be able to cope with twins?

Also you are being rude to Lucky, everyone is free to post their opinions

Original poster
bahia · 26/01/2009 02:28

MA: in what way am I being rude? I asked a question and lucky is not answering but judging it. I don't judge her so I don't think she should waste my time posting her opinionated views on the world on my thread. The same can be said about your post on here so I suggest you take your well-meant advice^ elsewhere. Thank you.

OP posts:
Original poster
bahia · 26/01/2009 02:33

I am closing this thread here because I don't need time-wasters and disrespectful comments on my choices. I have found contact details for various private doctors on Harley St. and in NY offering exactly the services I am looking for.

OP posts:
nooka · 26/01/2009 04:06

What a rude poster! Interesting concept that anyone (other than MN Towers) can close a thread just because they don't like the opinions that they have after all solicited. I would have thought that most people who have experiences of twins via IVF would have had fertility problems, and would share lucky's opinion (I haven't and I do). However I am sure that if you pay enough money (and certainly if you look outside the UK) you will find a doctor who will give you fertility drugs to stimulate your ovaries, and then provide selective abortion to reduce to twins. That would seem the quickest way to guarantee twins, if not particularly ethical.

christiana · 26/01/2009 10:40

Message withdrawn

snowleopard · 26/01/2009 10:46

"I don't need time-wasters and disrespectful comments on my choices"

You do know where you are don't you...? If you post on here, people are completely free to remark on your question and your attitude, as long as they are reasonably polite (as Luckylady was) and not abusive.

As for timewasters

pookamoo · 26/01/2009 10:46

will this kick off even if the op has gone?

I had no idea it was even possible to do the things she was asking about, all ethics aside.
Must say I was a bit at the idea of selecting the sex of the baby, too!

Neeerly3 · 26/01/2009 10:54

all I can say is
OH
MY
GOD

CHOOSE to have twins and the also choose which sex? does this not come close to 'designer babies'? You get wot you're given mate, luck of the draw and all that.

1 in 80 or so normal pregnancies ends in twins, get baby dancing and try to do it naturally.....ask a handful of twin mummies and see which ones would have CHOSEN twins if they'd been asked the question beforehand!?

ChopsTheDuck · 26/01/2009 10:55

I'm at the fact she wants to choose twins full stop!
Twins aren't the easy option, jsut to get two under your belt in one go!

Take mine for a few days, then see if you still fancy it!

snowleopard · 26/01/2009 11:02

Maybe she has an army of help???

Actually I think I would like to have twins for similar reasons (getting on a bit, would have loved 3 kids, but I'll be lucky to get pg again even one more time) but I've been told often enough how exhausting it is and I know if it happened I'd be eating my words. I can understand the sentiment though.

scardypants · 26/01/2009 11:05

Bahia, as others have said I'm sure you could find a doctor who, for a substantial fee, would be willing to help you but your comments towards Lucky and MA are very rude and because of that I don't wish to comment further on your situation.

I do want to say though that I had considered IVF for reasons other than infertility. I started a thread not so long ago and I think there are other genuine reasons (fear being mine)for people wanting IVF so I was a little hurt by Luckys comment(my issues and not her intention - she said she was uncomfortable with it NOT that she thought anyone considering it was a bleep bleep!) HOWEVER both she and I, along with many other women find ourselves in situations unique to us and are going to have differing opinion and not always see the others point of view but that doesn't make any one of us 'more right' than the other.

This is an open forum and people can offer their opinions freely. Lucky was polite and didn't deserve your comment.

modernart · 26/01/2009 13:17

Well put scardy.

Hope your situation works out.

wannaBe · 26/01/2009 13:31

I'm afraid that the statement the op is "closing this thread" means I simply have to post on it.

The idea that someone could be helped to conceive twins is a load of bollocks. If it was that possible to ensure someone conceived twins then surely it would be that easy to ensure that infertile couples conceive just the one baby they so desparately want.

I'm sure that there are doctors out there who will happily take your money with the promise of twins, but given that conceiving a single baby through IVF has only a 20-30% success rate even when two embrios are implanted, the chance of twins are much much less.

I know of two women who have conceived twins on chlomid, but again there are no guarantees.

But throw your money away by all means.

eleveld · 26/01/2009 13:45

Bahia

This is an open forum discussion.

You started the thread. If you don't want to hear what people have to say on here, and if you don't like other people's opinions, then don't post on here! Instead, speak to someone in private who just says exactly what you want to hear.

nooka · 27/01/2009 01:51

I agree Wannabe, I would have thought Clomid or other ovarian stimulation techniques would be the way offered, I think in the US it is much less regulated. You can avoid IVF if you are happy to take the risk of fertilising lots of eggs at once, and having big multiples - this is why there are quints/sextuplets etc (very rarely conceived naturally). I can't think it would be at all a good idea, and I know that one of the reasons why people end up going this route in the States is because their insurance plans allow Clomid type drugs but nothing more.

dcb · 31/01/2009 08:45

Hope no-one with twins takes this the wrong way - but not sure why you would you choose to have them?!! Have lots of experience - my sisters are twins and a good friend has had twins recently. Such a lot of work. Also there are increased risks to both mother and baby health wise. I'm hoping I don't end up with twins next time round (runs in the family and recently come off the pill)as I'm a bit lazy and 1 was hard enough last time

skankymanky · 31/01/2009 08:58

lol at closing the thread.

Like it's up to you. lol lol

You are very arrogant and rude and i hope any children you have twins or otherwise don't grow up like you.

OTOH

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