TTC after ectopic

[TheUNITUBER]

HiI thought it might be good to have a thread for women ttc after an ectopic pregnancy, or those in their "waiting period" to begin ttc again after treatment. Trying to conceive after ectopic has its own particular difficulties, IME, because of the fear of it happening again. If there is anyone out there who has experienced this and wants to talk, I'm here.My story: I had my first ectopic earlier this year and was treated with methotrexate. I waited three months and conceived again in July, which became a chamical pregnancy. With both of those pregnancies I just knew that something was wrong - although I did not have a single "classic ectopic" symptom. Then in August I was thrilled to become pregnant again and this time the pregnancy seemed completely normal. Unfortunately it was another ectopic in the same tube as my first and this time I lost the tube. I'm recovering from the surgery and feeling rather shell shocked at the moment. The first time I had an ectopic I thought it was just bad luck, and lightening would not strike twice in the same place. Then it did, and it is huge thing to process. I very much want another child (I already have one) and feel like time is getting away from me.So, if anyone is going through this too and would like to talk, please pipe up. Or if you have been through this and come out the other side (preferably with a successful pregnancy to show for it) please could you post? I could use some hope right now. Thanks

Hi everyone, still TTC, was convinced we had conceived last month, felt sick and had lots of 'symptoms' but turns out I wasn't. I think I was so desperate to be pregnant that I imagine aches and pains to be symptoms, maybe i'm just finally losing my marbles

Does anyone know what happens with ovulation after an EP. I lost my left tube but my left ovary was fine.

Do you continue to ovulate from alternate sides, if so what happens to my eggs from the left side if their is no tube there?

Or do you just ovulate from the healthy side?

After EP I was told that other tube and ovaries looked fine and there would be no reason that I couldn't conceive again. But can this change over the years? EP was 3 years ago and I worry that in the mean time scar tissue may have built up???

Sorry, so many questions but my head is swimming!

Hi Memoo

I'm sorry to hear it didn't work out for you last cycle but hopefully this one will be better.

My Dr told me that you do continue to ovulate from both sides after a salpingectomy. The thing is that what we were told at school - that you alternate the side you ov from each month - is wrong. In fact it is a sort of race between the 2 ovaries each cycle, so it is possible that you might ovulate from one side a few times and then the other. Or I guess since sometimes women produce 2 eggs (non-identical twins) maybe in those months both ovaries ovulate.

The healthy tube should be able to pick up eggs from either side. I read something that suggests that this happens 30% of the time and so I guess there's still a chance even if you ovulate on the tubeless side.

I don't know about the scar tissue, but I guess you could go for some tests to check on your remaining tube.

HTH - I know it is disappointing to get a BFN, but hopefully we'll all get our BFPs before too much longer.

hi gang

i just joined today as i read the posts and its all been so close to home.

i fell pregnant 2 weeks of trying, had my tube removed 7 weeks into the pregnany, when i had the op and came round from anethetic i asked the nurse did they remove my baby ok. she said it wasnt a baby.

i was told to wait 2 full cycles before trying again. the op was on may this year and im still not pregnant. i get so many symptoms and the feeling is real but doesnt happen.

im in a good relationship but im pushing him away as i feel im holding him back from being a dad as its my body thats failing.i couldnt hold on to my baby and now my equipments not doing its job. its hurting me soo bad.

Hi lisanne. Gosh it is such a lot to deal with, isn't it? FWIW, it's not really very long to be trying since May - I know it seems like ages since you conceived first time before but 6 months is pretty normal really. Have you had any tests done on your remaning tube? Maybe that's something to ask your GP about?

Lisanne,

I just saw your post and wanted to say i comiserate. I am shocked at the insensitivity of some staff. an embryo is living whether it is in a tube or not...and it's normal to grieve for it even if the pregnancy can never happen. I don't know why nurses fail to see an ectopic pregnancy as a baby. I had 2 ectopics after months of trying for a baby and was told similar things from insensitive staff. They failed to realise that for me a positive test in itself was a huge step forward. The ectopic pregnancy trust were much more supportive.

Listen I hope things work out for you soon. What you have described reminds me of the 4 years I went through before my DD arrived last May. It took me a long time because unbeknown to me both my tubes were damaged and I needed fertility treatment. That's not the case for everyone, so i have not written that to alarm you in anyway...there are other women who conceive much quicker and without fertility treatment. (They say if you have an ectopic there is a 1 in 10 chance of having another...I was the 1 in 10.) I just wanted to say what you are feeling is normal given your situation and that I have been there.

Mrs. Happy how are things with you?

Lots of love,

NS. XXX

Newbishad- am fine thanks. Have been off to see the fertility specialist who is sending me for an HSG at the end of the month if I don't get pg before then. Then it is clomid/clomid and IUI/IVF depending on the results. Either way it is such a relief to have someone take control of everything and to get some continuity of care.

How are things with you?

Lisanne - I just wanted to add that maybe the nurse thought she was helping. I try very hard not to think of my ectopics as babies. With the first one it was easy since I knew something was wrong from the day I found out I was pg. With the second it was harder because I had such high hopes. It has helped me to think of them not as babies, but as the chance of babies IYSWIM. I also tell myself that they probably had something wrong that meant they would not have been viable anyway. Yes, I'm probably deluding myself but to think of them as babies that I have lost would be too hard...

hi all

i have actually just found this thread, have been posting on vkfab thread.

i have also had an ectopic pg, was treated with methotrexate and my 3 month wait is over, so i am ttc again,

not sure whats worse... the 3 months waiting to start ttc or the wait after ttc.

hope all you ladies are doing well.

will read through the thread to get to know all your stories a bit better.

x

Mrs. Happy,

I am glad you are seeing the fertility specilaists and they are moving things forward. I just want to share my story with you. Obviously the clinic have experience and you should follow their suggestions...I just want to share this with you...because I was caused additional stress by the results of mine.

I had a laparoscopy after my first ectopic pregnancy and it showed that my left tube was normal. The clinic I was attending at the time recomended clomid despite the fact I had no obvious ovulation problems.

I had a second ectopic in my 'normal' tube almost a year later. The specilaists at my current fertility clinic now think I have subtle damage to both tubes (maybe the cilia weren't working properly)and recomended IVF. Had I gone through with IUI (as was initally suggested) it would almost certainly have failed.

I hope you don't mind my sharing this with you...I know each and everyone of us is different and your problems may be very different to mine. It's just that in my particular situation the wrong treatment was suggested especially given my age (at the time 35). I am delighted my current clinic recomended IVF.

I am well now and my DD is doing well. I am of course at risk of a third ectopic and am aware of this.

Love NS XX

Thanks for that, Newbishad. I am aware that there might be damage that the HSG does not pick up or alternatively that it is possible that my tube just does not work and that another ectopic is a possibility. TBH although the Dr has recommended IUI if my HSG results are ok, I think I will instead be asking for clomid and monitoring for 3 months and then IVF if that fails. I don't have any ovulation probs either - the hope is just that if I produce more than one egg there will be a greater chance of one of them being picked up by my remaining tube.

The thing is that it is only another ectopic or me failing to get pg that will provide evidence that all is not well with my other tube. In the absence of such evidence the clinic prefer to recommend the least intervention, and I do understand their logic. If I can get pg without IVF then all well and good. If not, well, I guess I won't have lost much, just a few months and some money (for the clomid and scans!).

I'm glad all is well with you. There's a really good chance that your next pregnancy will be in the right place.

Hi there,

I'm really happy for you that you've made that decision. I hope all works out for you in the future and let us know.

Lots of love,

NS

Hey Everyone!
Three years ago I had an ectopic pregnancy, got the shot to save my tube, and dealt with all sorts of insensitive hospital staff. After three years I am now TTC and I am very scared. Hopefully everything will good and best of luck to everyone!!

Hi All

I have ready every one of your stories and it has given me a little bit of comfort.
I too have recently had an ectopic pregnancy and was seven weeks when i was operated on 4th Nov. I had a diagnostic laparascope which then led to a full laparotomy and then a right salpingectomy thankfully my tube hadn't ruptured as i was diagnosed early and only because i had abnormal bleeding which they investigated straight away but what makes it slightly harder to deal with is the fact this was to be my first baby.
I have been told that my other tube is healthy and i have healthy ovaries but i'm sure as with you all there is that bit of fear for the future. I too have been told to wait at least 3 months before trying again and that is also hard if anyone can give me any more advice i would be grateful

hiya - i had emergency surgery for an a rupture three weeks ago. I was initially given methotrexate and 4 days into the treatments had severe pain and was rushed into surgery - i had my right tube removed. I was realy concerned about the removal of the tube and my future fertility but have since heard so many stories about women who went on to have 2 or even 3 children afterwards. So don't give up. Does anyone know when i will be able to pick up my 18 month old son - still feeling quitte delicate.

Maldives sorry I can't comment on how long before you can pick up your son - maybe a few weeks, like other types of surgery?

I had an ectopic 4 years ago, caught very early and treated with methotrexate as well. Seemed to have a good result... unfortunately my gyn did NOT tell me that often times an ectopic will shut down the function of the tube. So DH and I spent 3 years, charting, bonking, waiting, hoping, testing... just to do it all over again. Last year I finally went to see a fertility specialist who did an HSG on me and confirmed my left tube is blocked. My new doc also told me that it is more common to have an ectopic on the side where your more fertile ovary is. Now we're undergoing IUI with fertility meds - cycle 3. No luck yet, but we're staying hopeful!

Hi everyone. This is my first time on here so I am not quite sure what to write. I had a 12+ ectopic rupture that was missed at six weeks by another hospital - they told us we had miscarried again but turns out it was in my right tube. I had a laparoscopy on 7th June (I think it's still hazy) and they also punctured my bladder so I came home with a supapubic catheter in place for 9 days too that is now removed. I have not had a bleed/period since the surgery not sure when to expect it. The surgeon did talk to us afterwards but it is still a blur. I went to find why I was bleeding and in pain like contractions and in 24 hours was told I was pregnant 12 weeks + it was ectopic admitted on the Tuesday it burst early Wednesday morning, in theatre then awake in pain minus a tube, grieving for a baby we have already grieved for and in a total mess really. When should I expect my period?

Hi KFR, i had a laparoscopy on the 9th July, also had an ectopic pregnancy and right tube removed. I didn;t have any of the additional complications you did, sorry to hear about it all. I bled for about a week after the surgery, and am now waiting for my next AF, I had a MC in sept and after that it took 7-8 weeks until I had another AF, then my cycles were very long, ranging from 42-48... I am afraid we may both just have to wait and see... I don't know about you but I could do with some hand holding, you fancy a "when will we get our next AF and really scared about TTC" buddy?

Hi girlwithacurl, I would love a "when will get our next AF and scared about TTC buddy"
We really want to try again as we don't want a big gap from our last one, but the doctors told us that our chance of it happening again are higher now and like you we are only trying with one tube I really dont want to go through it all again. For a woman I am completley clueless about cycles and ovulation days. I thought we would try again then nine months baby arrives. It has really put me off to be honest.

yes, I am worried about the increased risk, and made the mistake of reading possibly a bit too much, some of the stats are really depressing .

So are you trying for number two? what do you have already? how long have you been trying?

I really want to start again straight away, but it looks like it is best to wait 1-2 cycles... I know what you mean, i thought we would start trying and then boom we would get pg. It never crossed my mind that it would take so long (we have been trying for a year and a half now). Most of my friends seem to get pg just like that, and I am happy that they don't have to go through all this rubbish, but feel that sometimes it is all so unfair (stamping feet and shaking fists emoticon).

I know what you mean. I feel really selfish as we have three they are 5,3,2. Since the last one I have had loads of problems bleeding weekly and pains but they never found a cause had a smear test everything was fine no explaination. I know we should be happy (and we are with our three) but we always wanted a large family. We have had a miscarriage and now this. Don't know if someone is trying to tell us something or not. I have a friend who you only have to look at and she is pregnant. A friend of my sisters just had a termination at 17 weeks as hse said she did not know she was pregnant It's just really frustrating especially as there seem to be no real answers. Think I may have read too much to, although I was in a hairdressers the other day and the woman next to me heard me talking and said she was cut right across the pelvis in the 80's to have her right tube and ectopic removed then had three children in 3 years. She said having laparoscopy's is less invasive so don't loose hope it will happen Just getting that blue line and making it to the 12 week scan seeing everything is in the right place is we want

it sounds like you have had loads of problems, I am really sorry. Bleeding weekly and pains sounds really bad, I can't believe they haven't found a reason for it!

I am going to find it soo hard to wait to try again, people keep telling me I need time to heal, physically and emotionally. Physically that is fair enough and I feel like I am healing fine, but don't want to either jeopardise or run the risk of greater chance of it happening again. Emotionally I just want to get on with it, waiting is so hard, I just want to be pregnant, and like you see the 12 week scan as the goal... every time I think about waiting or our much lower risk I start to get a bit wobbly.

Hi girlwithacurl AF has arrived. I'm pleased in one way because it means the surgery in some sense was a success and everything is working, but now it means that I am actually facing the reality of trying again. Before now it was talking about it now in seven days it could be a reality and all the fears are bubbling up.Since I had my surgery I had 4 days of bleeding straight after then nothing. They now believe that the manual removal of the placenta in my last birth damaged the tube causing the blockage that lead to the ectopic this time. Still means with one tube left and an increased risk factor it makes it all very scary now. How are you feeling? Like you phsyically I feel fine it's just in my head all the concerns and nerves swirling round.

Hi KFR, that is good news! I haven't even ovulated yet so will be at least 2-3 weeks, probably longer before I get AF! who would have thought I would actually be hopeing she came around!
I understand your apprehension, in a way do you feel better knowing there was a reason? its all really scary, I am scared of not getting PG, of getting PG and it being ectopic again, or MC again... I go up and down really, when I think about the fact I have lost a tube I feel realy teary, my DP is being lovely and we have an enforced few weeks of "not trying" which will probably be good for us.

Hi girlwithacurl sorry for the late response been rally busy. On a whim we have decided to take the kids camping for a few days. Get away from the daily chores and reminders of it all. Leaving the phones at home no Emails or calls just us take some time to ge over it really. Decided that I am not going to feel like we are "actively" trying just relax, be happy and enjoy. I'm still here (minus a tube maybe) but being positive today sun is shinning and feeling more confident evry day as the scars fade. I hope you are feeling better. If it is any consolation AF was probably one of the best ever. I know that sounds weird but where mine have been all over the place for two years it was lighter 7 days on the dot and less painful. Try to relax and not stress out to much about waiting for AF. I'm sure everything wil be fine for both of us. Never know Santa might not be the only one with a round tum and rosey cheeks at Christmas we hopefully could be his body doubles!!

TheUNITUBER: I Understand where and what your going through. I'm 22 years old i have a 2 year old son but 3-4 weeks before my birthday (November 16) i foundout i was pregnant with my second child i also had light spotting although the first altrasound i went to they couldnt see anything so they thought it was too early, the second altrasound i went to which was on my birthday (3 weeks later) they still couldnt see anything although an outting of a object in my tube the bleeding had stopped at this stage, next thing i know i had to rush up to the E.R an hour away from where i live in nz and was stuck in there for 3 days due to complications. in the end i had the treatment instead of getting my tube removed i had no pain at all throughout the whole pregnancy up until a few days later i had med/bleeding which last over a week and its been almost 3 months since ive been in hospital and had treatment and finally got my period. I'm hoping to get pregnant again although scared is the word and how i still feel. I was misdiagnosed at the start by my midwife in which i had done all the blood test required and the last thing on her mind was ectopic or misscarriage but i knew clearly something was wrong as due to the blood loss and med/ bleeding before i had the second altrasound. My child has just turned 2 years old so i was happy to hear i was pregnant again but now im hoping i dont have to wait this out oo long my child is getting lonely has no play buddies and i hope hes not going to the only child. would be great to have another child or two. so lets hope all for the best. What i'd like to know is how common is it "After misscarriage or ectopic pregancny canone fall pregnant again and go on to having healthy ormal babies?"

UNIZ, I know where you arecoming from here. I had an ectopic pregnancy in 2004 and lost one of my tubes, but following that had a miscarriage. However in 2006 I did fall pregnant and have my DD at 27+4wks (pre-eclampsia). Since then I have had another Miscarriage, followed by a missed miscarriage. Now I am diagnosed with pcos we are ttc using metformin to help. The gp seems to think it is possible to have a normal healthy pregnancy although I am labelled High Risk. Hope it helps.