Friend pregnant after my miscarriage and still ttc

[rainraingoaways]

My partner and I decided we’d start trying for another baby in January because we’ve always wanted our children to be close in age.

Late last year (around September/October) I unexpectedly found out I was pregnant. We were really happy, but sadly I miscarried. After that we decided to carry on having unprotected sex but no tracking and then start trying again in January.

We’ve been trying since then and it hasn’t happened yet. Today I found out that a close friend is pregnant. I feel really guilty even saying this, but I feel jealous. I am genuinely happy for her, but it also hurts that it’s not me.

We’d talked before about how nice it would be to go through pregnancy at the same time, so hearing her news has brought up a lot of feelings. I know realistically there’s still plenty of time for things to happen, but part of me worries that it won’t.

I’ve recently started taking the recommended vitamins and have my partner taking them too, and I’m tracking ovulation in a few different ways.

I guess I’m just wondering if anyone else has experienced these mixed emotions while trying after a miscarriage, and how you coped with it. It was my second miscarriage although between both miscarriages I convinced and had a baby. We both have baby’s already close in age.

Trying to stay relaxed about it all

I'm really sorry about your miscarriages. I think how you're feeling is completely normal. I'm trying for my second, worried I'm too old and have been jealous of other people's announcements, and that's without experiencing a loss. Don't be hard on yourself xx

I am in a really similar position to you. I found out I was pregnant after one month of trying for our second child in Dec 2024 and Sadly I had a missed miscarriage at 12 weeks. It’s now been 11 months of trying and it’s not been successful. In the mean time 3 of my close friends have got pregnant and two have had their babies, with the last due in June. . They are so cute and I am so happy for them.

I can be both sad for me and happy for them at the same time. I can also be so jealous that it’s easy for some people and not easy for us. (My son also took 11 months to conceive). My friends have been so kind and told me privately before announcing and I have been honest with them that I am so happy for them and yet I am still sad.

You aren’t alone in all these mixed feelings and I think of your friend is a good friend which she sounds like she is, she will understand this.

Completely understand how you’re feeling. Me and my husband have been trying for 6 months now. Had a chemical beginning of November. I have a friend who decided they were going to start trying, didn’t track, dtd once and she fell pregnant. What hurt the most is we fell pregnant within a day or two of each other and her pregnancy continued whilst mine didn’t. She’s now 21 weeks this week. It was really hard at the beginning but quite quickly I was okay and we have obviously just kept going with no luck yet.. our time will come x