Would love some advice / WWYD: I had a miscarriage in December at 10 weeks. It was physically and emotionally very tough, and because I’m self-employed with a huge and stressful deadline, I wasn’t able to take any time off beyond a weekend. That pressure is ongoing and will continue until mid March.
My husband and I would like to try again, but I’m feeling very conflicted. I’m due to ovulate next week and can’t decide whether to try or not.
Since the miscarriage I’ve put on over a stone and a half through stress, and I feel quite depleted both physically and emotionally. Part of me worries that if I did get pregnant now, I’d be starting a pregnancy already run down and not in the best place.
At the same time, I’ve just turned 35, have no children yet, and would love 1-2. I don’t want to keep delaying or let work dictate things again, especially as I already feel work played a role in delaying this decision last year.
If I weren’t to get pregnant this month (which is of course likely), I think I’d like to give myself a few months to recover properly (emotionally and physically) before trying again. A December or January birthday (conceiving in March / April) wouldn’t be ideal for us anyway, so that timing would actually suit to take this ‘break’.
What’s making me hesitate is that it would be amazing to have a November baby this year if we were lucky enough to conceive now. I do realise this is all very “ideal scenario” thinking and that it may take time to conceive, but I feel I have to approach it as if it could happen.
After March I’ll finally be able to take some time off work, which also feels relevant.
I’m torn between trying now despite not feeling at my best, or deliberately waiting a few months (until May) to recover when work calms down - WWYD?