Positive stories please? (Feeling so sad)

[Wheretoholiday71]

Hi everyone,
I unfortunately had a chemical pregnancy at 5 weeks, we didn't ttc the cycle after as suggested by doctor to skip that cycle, we tried the next cycle and couldn't believe our luck that we had fallen pregnant again, had an early scan as a result of cramps and there was a heartbeat but unfortunately this pregnancy very sadly ended in a MMC at approx 10 weeks.
Its been a couple of months and we have not been ttc since.
I am so heartbroken, lost, have been suffering with my mental health.
Is there anyone with a similar story, how did this end for you? I am so desperate to be a mam xx

Oh I’m so sorry it is very hard

I was much older so “qualified” for this book but I did have success with my second pregnancy at 40 after an early miscarriage and two chemical pregnancies. “It starts with the egg.” It gives advice for making sure eggs are too quality, but also sperm.

I know it’s not much solace but iirc 1 in 4 pregnancies do not succeed; in the past we wouldn’t have known about an early miscarriage as it would have just been a heavy period. I did test early as I had to adjust my medication (thyroxine) so did pick up the two chemicals.

further down the line if you continue to have issues it’s worth speaking to gp to check for thyroid issues

I'm so sorry for your losses. I had 2 early miscarriages/chemical pregnancies then a MMC at 12 weeks. I can honestly say it was one of the most difficult times of my life and hugely impacted my mental health. I was 35 at the time and didn't know if I would be able to have the child I so desperately wanted. I was referred to a miscarriage clinic, but all tests came back normal. In the end I went on to have a perfectly healthy pregnancy a few months later. I then had a very early miscarriage when ds1 was about a year old, followed a few months later by a healthy pregnancy with dd. Unbelievably, we had a surprise pregnancy when I was 40 resulting in ds2!

Please be gentle with yourself. The heartbreak of pregnancy loss is real and sometimes not properly understood or acknowledged by those around us. Wishing you all the best xx

Thank you so much. Reading your positive story gives me so much hope!
I am so sorry for your losses too, it is terribly sad to have to experience. I feel totally heartbroken, I feel I am in physical pain all over from the heartbreak of it all (im sure this is all in my head but the grief feels so heavy) I am really struggling this Christmas as there are babies/young kids in the family and Ive been buying them outfits/toys and I suppose being in that environment just reminds me that we dont have a little one to buy for.
If you dont mind me asking did it take long for you to conceive with your first successful pregnancy after your losses? And did you do anything at all differently with/in preparation for that pregnancy xx
Thank you for sharing your story

Thank you for the book recommendation I will be sure to take a look for this as to be honest I am willing to try absolutely anything.
Thank you for sharing your story with me and I am so terribly sorry you have had to experience loss too x

I'm so sorry, that must be so difficult for you at Christmas time

It didn't take long to conceive with ds1, a couple of cycles maybe. I don't think anything I did changed the outcome tbh. We had tests which showed that the third miscarriage was due to a genetic issue (trisomy 13; it was spontaneous rather than inherited, so just down to bad luck).

I did read obsessively at the time and did everything I could to eat healthily, didn't drink alcohol, took folic acid, and vaguely remember eating pineapple cores for some reason! With number 3 I was taking hrt (for pms, not menopause) and I've always wondered if the extra progesterone helped (although I'm pretty sure studies suggest it doesn't make a difference). I also came across a theory about super fertility which I felt might be relevant as I was able to get pregnant but had early losses.

Like I said before, it really was one of the hardest times of my life. I felt it changed me as a person and I grieved deeply for a long long time, so you're not alone. Take care of yourself. xx

It took me fifteen cycles and the threat of IVF to conceive our son (we’d done all the tests and were days away from starting a round when I got the positive). It then took two years and three miscarriages (including one from a round of IVF) before we had our daughter. She was conceived the month after our IVF loss as a last natural attempt before we began a frozen transfer round.

I’m really sorry you’ve had to suffer as well. Feeling like you’re going right back to the start is just the worst thing :( I really hope you get your sticky bean soon!

Thank you so much for sharing your story and I am so sorry for your losses too xx Im glad there was light at the end of the tunnel for you

I seem to be the same, I got pregnant quickly both times so hopefully I will have one that sticks next time. My doctor did prescribe progesterone after my second miscarraige but before any tests at all which seemed more like she was maybe throwing medication at the problem but its worth a try I guess.

Thank you, it is so good to know Im not alone as I do feel this has massively changed me as a person too and taken away the bubbly and happy person I used to be. It has taken away the excitement of ttc and pregnancy but I pray we will get our baby some day soon.

Have a lovely Christmas and thank you again for sharing xx