TTC journey is exhausting

[sunshinecitrus1]

AF arrived this morning which marks the start of our 4th month TTC. I know that many people have been on this journey a lot longer than me but I just wanted to voice how mentally and emotionally hard these journey’s can be!

We conceived our first born in the first month of trying which I know was very very lucky, the stars must have aligned for us but I think this time around that has made it harder because naturally, the expectation was for it to happen again very quickly which of course isn’t the case.

I have got much better at trying to distract myself from overanalysing things with my cycles as it was driving me crazy but it’s still a constant niggle in the back of my mind all of the time… Taking my temp every morning, OPK’s around ovulation, TTC during the fertile window, TTW…… Hope, waiting, disappointment… I just feel like I’m going round in circles.

I feel really deflated tonight as you can probably hear through my post but I guess I just want to vent… Anyone else???

4yr2m here. Secondary infertility (unexplained) had the same with my first that took 5.5 years ! I get really fed up some days especially as all tests look ‘perfect’

@Whenwillthiswork Oh I am so sorry to hear this, it must be so difficult not being able to understand why it’s this way 😟I can’t quite imagine how hard this process is for you as I am only 4 months in and I’m pulling my hair out! Already feel like it’s never going to happen again for us. It’s not about being impatient because I’m not and I get that these things can take time but I guess the want for a child can be so deep, it just feels such an emotional rollercoaster when it doesn’t go to plan each cycle when you’re TTC. I really hope it works out for you 💐

9 years, 4 missed miscarriages then lost our baby girl at 22 weeks pregnant in September. They had to induce her to save me because I had a serious infection threatening my life. We start IVF next year as I have been diagnosed with translocations so need PGT Testing.

My advice would be to keep as busy as you can and do as much "normal" life as you can. 4 months isn't long at all but if it draws out you're better off getting yourself in a good headspace now to deal with the cycles (because you're absolutely right about going round in circles!). Hopefully you're not waiting too much longer.

@Moosey898 I am so sorry, you have been through an awful lot 💔 Wishing you all the best with IVF next year. I feel bad for moaning about 4 months now after hearing yours and @Whenwillthiswork stories but I guess we are all on different journey’s and trying to navigate it the best we can. Thanks for the advice, I completely agree about the good headspace and is definitely something I am working on x

@sunshinecitrus1 Thank you. I can't describe the level of emotional and physical exhaustion. The scariest thought is that we're very much in the "if we become parents" not "when" territory.

Your first experience was super lucky - that sets your brain up to expect it again which makes it trickier. So long as you have realistic expectations (that it is totally normal to take up to a year) then that will really help if it takes longer. Best of luck xx

Yess me please! Been trying for 3 years and 2 months. Unexplained secondary infertiltiy - got tested - all fine. Ive tried every supplement possible, acupuncture, massages, diets etc. It is mentally and physically draining. I am so tired. Soo tired. Ive given up - no longer have the energy in me 😞

@Enn1234 Oh I’m sorry to hear this. No one really talks about how deeply emotionally difficult this journey is. We’re currently on month 4 of trying, I’m 14dpo today… Feel like I am going to get my period any minute but will find out tomorrow as that is my due date. My luteal phase is usually 12 / 13dpo, never been 14dpo before and I ovulated slightly earlier this cycle but BBT decreased a couple of days ago and then went up ever so slightly this morning so I have no idea but trying to manage expectation's, not getting too hopeful but thinking “what if?” is such a mental impact. I have felt like a zombie the last couple of days, everything is so heavy because like you, I am feeling so emotionally affected and tired from it all and I am only 4 proper months in!

I feel the same. Currently in our 6th cycle of trying and I really thought it would just happen. I fell unexpectedly with our son whilst on the mini pill but now when we’re actively trying it’s just not happening.

@Bubs94 How old is your son? I had the same expectation too as we fell pregnant within the first month with our son as well. I think sometimes we just think our bodies can just get pregnant because of previous experiences and now I realise how naïve that is!

@sunshinecitrus1 hes 4, 5 in April. I had a chemical a couple of cycles ago which delayed ovulation and period last cycle and currently, I’m still testing and waiting for my peak which is no where to be seen. How old is your son?

@Bubs94 Our sons are very similiar in age, my son is 4 also, 5 in August. Sorry to hear about the chemical, I hope you spot your peak soon… So frustrating! AF appeared for me today which I have been expecting as my temp has been lower over the last few days. Disappointed obviously but in a way relieved this cycle is over so I can just start a new one now. It has felt like a lot of waiting for confirmation this time around, probably because I’ve been off work over Christmas with more time on my hands which hasn’t help!