When I first embarked on egg freezing I found the internet scant in proper information beyond the generalist intro articles and relied on Mumsnet for all the IVf/drug chat as I was so hungry for guidance. I’ve just defrosted my eggs and successfully used them (gave birth in last 4 weeks) so thought I might post my experience to encourage other bewildered,single women like I was a bit. So my advice:
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don’t do an AmH/fertility check unless you can then afford the whole freezing fandango. I did it just as I turned 32 thinking it “routine” for reassurance only to be told one ovary had no follicles at all/had shut up shop, my amh was 7/about that of a 38yr old and I really needed to get on and freeze. I knew I couldn’t live with the regret if I didn’t follow this advice and it all went wrong, plus I calculated that even if I met The Man the next day (which I did within 18 months) by the time were married etc and trying for second child we would likely be needing IVF anyway. I’ve very very lucky was able to afford it though- don’t put yrself up for the trauma if it isn’t an option.
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By “afford” I mean afford more than one round. I ended up doing 4 as I averaged 5 eggs each round and knew there was no real reassurance unless I banked 15. I only did the 4th as I changed clinic after the first round and bought a 3 round package at the next. I feel a bit odd/embarrased/possibly exploited about this but heyho.
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also think about how you will feel about disposing of eggs down the line if unused/not needed. I find the ethical side of it all plays on my mind far more than I expected and no one even mentioned it to me. I have c 10 eggs left I’m still paying storage for and don’t know how I feel…
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chose a clinic with a good and responsive receptionist with decent IVF stats. I chose one of the largest famous clinics in west London because I believe it has done more egg freezes than other clinics. But their client handling/responsivness was APPALLING. They never answered the phone, refused to email or leave a message and would just call me back randomly during the day. I worked open plan in an office that would look down on egg freezing so couldn’t immediately start chatting about my fertility when I picked up but they were unwilling to wait on the line until I went somewhere private, preferring to “try again later”. I ended up having to go to AandE at one point to get more clean needles like a druggy as just couldn’t get through to them in time/get a reply before the weekend. All their forms/guidance were also written as though you doing IVF/had a partner in attendance which when you are stoked full of hormones and single frankly made me feel shit (I felt really pretty sad and vulnerable throughout it all which must be common). If I did it again I would do the egg extraction at a nice local regular clinic and then transfer the eggs for the defrost/fertilisation bit to a real expert clinic as I think then the experience of embryologist really matters. (Nb when I used the same clinic for defrosting their client handling still hadn’t really improved and billing was complete chaos)
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don’t underestimate the cost and also the physical toll of defrosting/implanting. Costs had shot up since I first froze and I had assumed I had done all the hard drug bit with the egg extraction. I was surprised by how hard I found the 4-5 months of HRT drugs I had to take until the 12 week pregnancy point (nb you take for a while prior to implantation). Also managing the forms and appointments still a chore..
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do it. I’m now 40 with a healthy (fingers crossed) second child. I have no doubt had I tried iVF at my age with my no doubt now minuscule amh (noting I had already tried 2 yrs naturally), I may not have been so lucky. I’m tremendously grateful I was able to do it and had the funds and science to help.