Feeling in the inbetween

[AmberMaps]

Hi all. I'm 9 cycles into TTC and feeling like I don't really belong in this forum or the infertility forum. Wondering if there's many people here who feel like they have 'graduated' from the initial excitement and researching phase of TTC but don't feel like they really belong with the IVF/infertility group yet?

I'm almost bored of TTC, disappointed and not sure what to say anymore...

I feel your pain entirely. I started trying in 2023 and expected to have a baby within the year. 3 failed pregnancies later and 1 fallopian tube down (ruptured ectopic) now I just feel deflated. I still want a baby but if I ever get pregnant it’ll just be anxiety from the moment I get a positive test. All the excitement and joy of ttc is gone X

Also 9 cycles in this month and almost can't bear to test because I can't face the disappointment, especially before Christmas - it's excruciating some months! I'm so tired of all the testing and tracking and hope followed by disappointment.. but what else can you do? If anyone has any good distraction mechanisms I'd be keen to hear them because I still feel like I'm driving myself crazy with it :( we've agreed to do private fertility testing in January if it hasn't happened by then and that feels like a scary step to have to take..
Sorry you're feeling it too! It's a painful journey when it takes this long.. praying for a BFP for you soon! x

If I was in your shoes, as someone who is on year 5 of ttc and only just been seen under the nhs for infertility, I would go to your GP and say you’ve been trying for over a year just to get yourself on the waiting list

Ah there are still lots of us here who have been TTC for a long time. You are more than welcome and don't feel like you don't belong here. In fact, I think being with others who are also experiencing a prolonged TTC journey is weirdly supportive. It's nice to know there are others who feel the same and who get it. There's a few of us on the Hopeful Hearts thread that have been trying for a long time.

You're not alone.

I'm probably beyond the stage you're at (2 years TTC#2 and having fertility treatment) but I definitely remember feeling this way both at around the 7-8 month mark this time and when TTC#1 (which took 11 cycles). It's exactly as you say, the novelty has worn off and the threads with all the people just starting out become disheartening (because you know a load of them will be pregnant within 1-2 cycles) but you feel a bit fraudulent and/or premature stepping into the threads with people who are deep in IVF etc.

I’ve had 5 pregnancies. Many of them were chemicals, one was ectopic, one was healthy. All were natural. I have mild pcos. I know my cycles aren’t textbook but they are regular with slightly late ovulation.
i can get pregnant and I know a lot about my cycle by now but I’ve not had full term yet. But my fertility tests have been good.
so I suppose I’m also in the in between!
you definitely belong and we all belong

I feel like you and I’m only on cycle 5. I know it’s not that long in terms of other people but 5 whole months and l also had a chemical pregnancy loss feels like forever. Im fed up of the constant cycle of disappointment. Don’t feel like it’s ever going to happen.