I want another baby.I should have another baby. Why is it so fecking hard?

[OracleInaCoracle]

seriously?

why wont my body work the way its meant to?

book an expensive holiday for about 11 months time. Then its bound to happen as it will be really inconvenient!

Wanted you to know that there is someone out here listening. Infertility always seems to strike the people that would make such lovely parents (DH and me included, of course ).

thank you. dh thinks that ftc is making me bitter, and i know it is, but i cant help feeling resentful now.

mrstm,

it is so unfair and random
and i thikn that is why it is so hard to bear
bad things should not happen to good people
it seems so wrong

are you not getting anywhere with LWH?

of course you are feeling bitter and resentful, you have the added awfulness of being able to get pregnant very easily, but not stay pregnant.

it is absolute torture

Oh Lissie .

lissie .

big hugz, hun!

I became very bitter too. I had dealt with a very difficult bereavement before I married DH and I thought that that was the worst possible thing that I could go through. But to be honest, FTC was worse. I think it's because when you know that someone has died, then once you're over the shock, you can start to grieve properly. With TTC, I could never grieve as after each BFN was another month that could be "it", and it was the huge rollercoaster of massive hope and crushing defeat that wore me out. I think that it's very very rare person who doesn't get bitter every now and then. Because it is so unfair!

I'm a bit of a fraud on this topic, by the way. I can't help continuing to lurk on Conception, but I'm actually pregnant now (after more fertility treatment). I really hope that you'll be lucky soon.

thanks mrsTM and lacomtesse, just feeling sorry for myself, period has arrived 3d early just to completely throw me!

pmsl expat.

lulu, nowhere at all. RSH (my local hospital, who certainly didnt help our situation) are being vv helpful now (made a big fuss bout this misplaced bladder saga) and will prescribe heparin asap, progesterone if i start spotting and clomid if im not knocked up in 3m. back at LWH in june, but not holding my breath tbh.

when you move up to Edinburgh, lissie, you'll find Simpson's very helpful!

they have a wonderful reproductive medicine centre.

thanks expat, thats where im hoping to do my placement. Napier has placed students there in the past.

VERY good care there, lissie!

I had both mine there.

is that where you will be having this one too?

think i'm going to wind up at RAH - Paisley, but we'll see how it pans out.

had planned to stay with SIL or ILs but SIL and her partner have split and she's currently living with ILs so we'll need to see what happens.

if im up there you can stay with us! (disclaimer: will obv have to meet first to rule out hairy truckerage on both sides)

feeling a bit more optimistic today. period hasnt actually started yet so the devil on my shoulder is whispering "may be implantation"

Fingers crossed for you lissie. Whatever happens, I'm glad that you are being taken seriously by the hospital.
I was thinking about this in bed last night, and someone famous once said "the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result". Which is of course what you have to do when TTC very often. No wonder that it drives us all crazy. Anyway, like I said, I'm really glad that you don't have to do the same thing over and over, because the hospital have drawn up a good plan for you.

i think thats the prob. i dont drink in the second 1/2 of my cycle, dh doesnt drink in the 1st. i dont drink caffeine, i eat plenty of wholewheats, full dairy and have even started having my steaks overcooked.

I didn't realise you were ttc again, last time i saw something from you on ttcing you were saying you were going to stop.I really hope it works out for you this time

tis shite lissie! take care.

lissie don't know what to say you have had more than enough heartache over the past few years, makes me feel very crap moaning the way I do.

Don't give up your body has done it once it CAN do it again.

VS, i cant stop! dh didnt want to either and we agreed that stopping would feel like we were letting down our lost ones.

thanks BE, im sorry about whats happened to you recently too x

I don't think I'd be able to stop either personally, but if you had decided to you wouldnt have let anyone down.
Good Luck Sweetheart.

i know that really, its just hard not to feel guilty iykwim

tell me about it.....

tis shite.