I want my tubes tied.

[CrowleyKitten]

I went to my GP about my already diagnosed Hydradenitis Suppurativa. (rare ish skin condition)
okay, not even MY GP. our practice has several and they try and get you in with whoever is available. I told them I wanted to see the one that diagnosed me, as she seemed to know about it. when I tried to get an appointment with the same doctor, I was fobbed off with things like "oh, she's off for two weeks, but I can get you in on Thursday with Dr someoneelse" I said I didn't mind waiting. "or doctor someoneelseelse on Friday"
ended up giving up.
recently during another flare up, my husband called to make an appointment for me. they said "oh she mostly works at our other practice (about the same distance in the other direction, so no problem) we can book you there, and make a note not to move it to another practitioner.

well. showed up, and it was someone I'd not seen before. she said I had "a ,little bit of HS" but that the rest of my skin issue was eczema (it's not. I've worked in skincare for years. it looks NOTHING like it) but at LEAST I got a dermatologist referral.

then she started on about my weight. good old Diagnosis=Fat, eh.
I'm five foot six and 93 kilos. chubby but not huge.
she decided I needed to go on different contraception than the one that's not let me down in decades with no side effects. but nope. no say in it. I have to change.

trying to find the guts to say I want my tubes tied. I'm worried about changing from something that's never given me a single issue or scare in all that time to something I've not had, and I don't know how my body will take it.

anyone had any experience of asking for Tubal in their mid 40s? there is no way I am physically or mentally up to having a baby, but I also know how quickly I form attachments. if they told me I was pregnant, that would be my baby I would fight heaven and earth for. even though I KNOW I cannot raise one
I just want that weight off my shoulders. I have chronic pain, lethargy and mental health issues. my husband is schizophrenic. he is open to the possibility of a vasectomy if they are more permissive with him than with me.

but if I have to change contraception, I really would like it to be permanent. so I don't need to worry about it anymore.

You have the right to female sterilisation on the NHS so go for it. However, do not requested tubes to be tied, ask for their removal. Having a salpingectomy will cut your risk of ovarian cancer by more than 95%. You won't go into early menopause.

It is far better for your husband to get a vasectomy, as it's less invasive and has less risk.

he's very anxious about medical procedures. he has agreed that if I can't get them to agree to it, he'll consider it.
I can't really ASK him to, because I'm the one that feels most strongly about it. the fact he'll consider it is good enough. in an ideal world, we'd both get done. but I can empathise with how he feels about medical procedures, due to PTSD, so I don't push it. it may come to him agreeing to do it, but I'm on the waiting list now for a consultation, so that's something. I'm sure they'll discuss all the different options and what they involve. that might be enough to get him to volunteer, when he realises how much easier his process would be.

that's useful to know. I'll raise that when discussing options