Feel sad and want to vent. AF arrived.

[Anonygal]

After another month of ttc, temp tracking, ovulation test kits, dtd a lot, and then lots of cheapo pregnancy tests during 2 week wait, period arrived today.

My sister in law is very pregnant with her second. My younger step sister announced her pregnancy a couple of weeks ago, having only just got married.

I can’t bring myself to be around friends who are pregnant or who have just had babies because I’m full of jealousy, anger and sadness.

Not looking forward to family Christmas activities with everyone talking about their pregnancies and me having to sound happy for them.

It really sucks and seems really unfair.

I'm so sorry. It is f**king shit and triggering and I hope it changes for you soon.

Not sure how long you have been trying for and whether it is worth talking to the GP.

:(

Thanks. Sometimes is just feels nice to tell a stranger on the internet.

Trying since August so I know it’s not that long, but it’s perhaps too soon to see a GP for them to do anything, but at the moment I just don’t understand why we we haven’t conceived yet. I’ve bought a Hertility test so I’m going to do that tomorrow and send it off as a first thing to do.

but yes, so overwhelmingly triggering. I just want to tell them to shut up and stop talking about their pregnancy and babies but obviously you can’t do that as it’s an incredibly happy time for them, and I can’t really say it to my partner either as it’s his sister, so I just silently think it.

It’s really hard. I’ve been TTC for 16 months, and 2 losses. When AF arrives I feel the same, and takes me a good few days to feel more myself again. It’s normal to feel like this, and to struggle around pregnant women.
Your time will come, it’s only been a couple of months so I’m sure it won’t be long until the stars align and you get that BFP

Sorry to hear it’s been a struggle for you. It’s really emotionally draining and during those AF days the bathroom sees a fair few tears!

Thank you, I hope your stars align too xxx

Hey there, sorry to hear you feel that way, i totally understand i always sob after having AF even if i promise myself not to. The ttc journey is not joke.
Îm like @Figtree11 2 losses and almost year in, it doesn't get easier.
I don't quite understand why suddenly when we want to try and ttc everyone around us gets pregnant 🤷🏻‍♀️ it's a mystery , my close friends are all pregnant and are 3 months apart from each other, and on top of that my sister inlaw is preg with her second and we married same period for many years now. I do feel like the elephant in the room in gathering and holidays. Just learnt they will be here around the holidays and i'm so pissed, i dont wanna be around preg ladies anymore. My friends knws abt the losses so they are careful around me with the baby talk and frankly i dont get to see them a lot.
All this to say you are definitely not alone, this space has shown me that most women struggle just like us but it's not talked abt enough.

TTC conceived definitely makes you a little crazy.
I had friends telling me they were pregnant, congratulating them and smiling. Then going to the loo for a cry, then feeling like a shitty friend.

But my time did you come after a loss, I decided to have a break from it all and it just happened?

I recommend a mini break and wine, think how many people got pregnant whilst drunk haha.

Good luck to you though, I know how it feels xxx

This sounds so tough, I’m so sorry to hear you’re going through this and feeling this way, but it absolutely makes me feel like I’m not alone. It isn’t talked about enough, I honestly don’t know anyone close to me who has told me they’ve had difficulty conceiving, it always appears like it’s happened instantaneously.

I’m in the same boat with my sister in law and honestly I just don’t want to see her at all. Everyone who tells me they are pregnant it’s like a punch to the gut, but I don’t want to feel like that.

wishing you all the best though and I hope it works out for you soon xxx

My mum had 12 miscarriages in 9 years before she had her first.

I was ttc five years before I got pregnant and miscarried. Three months after that I was expecting my first and ended up with three children under three.

It's a long journey for some women.

My GP laughed when I told him I'd been trying to get pregnant for a year - he said 'but that's only a dozen eggs. Come and see me in another 12 months. '

Did find a reason eventually - after three years finally found out I had an underactive thyroid. Another two years later and after a miscarriage, found out that I needed to be on a much higher amount of thyroxine for a successful pregnancy. (This was why my mother kept having miscarriages. I had told the GP about mum's history of miscarriage on my first visit and it took two years to get a first blood test done.)

I feel your pain - it's a lonely place to be. I used to think I was letting my husband down which hurt me more than the arrival of the period itself.

Just as I started to think it would never happen ....

One of my daughters got pregnant three times despite being on the implant. My other daughter got pregnant the first month she 'tried' with each pregnancy. She had a daughter, then had a miscarriage, then had twins with her third pregnancy.

Many women have had hard times with conception - it's more common than you think.

I have six wonderful grandchildren now.

Best of luck to you.

They say it can take up to 12 months to conceive!
Dont get stressed out about it because that’s not going to help, easier said than done though
My daughter desperately wants a baby, she’s had 3 MC and then her sister announced she’s pregnant, it’s soul destroying

Oh op, you have my sympathy. Ttc is the worst thing ever! It took dh and I 3 years and several mcs and cps to get ds1 and just as long to get ds2, Dr started talking about secondary infertility as we had nothing while we were trying for 2.

It's literally the shittest thing! I remember my best friend (who didn't want children) telling me she was pregnant and the complete confusion of my emotional response. I was so excited for her, but also so sad it wasn't me, and irrationally also angry that she didn't want children but had managed to conceive accidently.

I conceived both of mine during my ovulation window after going for spa days and having full body massages. Not sure if extreme relaxation and getting pregnant are correlated, but it's something 🤷‍♀️

Honestly I hope your ttc story is short and come Christmas you're carrying your own pregnancy announcement

TTC is so stressful but try to remember it is still very early days for you OP, it's only been max 3 cycles and it's very normal to take up to 12 for a healthy, fertile couple with no medical issues.
I believe the odds of conception in any given month are just 20%, so a 1 in 5 chance that each month will be 'your' month.
Please try not to stress, you are way off there being any indication of a problem and way off even thinking about seeing a GP, what you are experiencing at the moment is completely normal, nothing to suggest any difficulty in conceiving.

Try not to be consumed with bitterness. It is entirely possible to feel joy and excitement for others while wanting something badly for yourself too (and I say this as someone who just took 4 years to conceive). These are people you care about, try to be happy for them as they will no doubt be for you too when your time comes.

Stressing now won't do you any favours. Enjoy this bit, try to enjoy the process. If nothing by next summer, then the time to start thinking about contacting your GP and checking all is as it should be.

Good luck.

It took us 2 years to conceive our first baby. It was so so hard watching others get pregnant so easily. And it was always that they couldn’t believe how quickly it happened while I was 20 months in!! When we did get pregnant suddenly it was my turn and it felt amazing and I appreciated him that bit more. I guess I wanted to say that life finds a way and you are only one month away from your BFP. It’s easy to say this but try and focus on other things. I chucked the ovulation tests in the bin eventually and we just had sex 3-4 times a week from when my period ended. It took the pressure off me having to do all this other stuff. Mentally that helped. Good luck ❤️

It’s probably because the ones who have had a difficult journey don’t always open up to others. It’s much easier to share the stories about how quickly it happened. You are not alone. Many , many women take a while to get pregnant and even struggle to conceive but most get there eventually. This is a good chance to do your best to show happiness for others even if you feel like rubbish inside. When it’s your turn you would want the same from them ❤️