Hubby getting frustrated

[Cosycomfort]

Hi guys, new posting on here although been an avid reader since I was pregnant in Feb which was a missed miscarriage so now trying again though no luck so far.
Last month I think was a chemical, I had spotting along with faint tests, which eventually turned into af.
This month I'm on CD43 of what usually is a 34 day cycle with bfn today, I've been having cramps on and off for almost 2 weeks as well as nausea and bloating. The bfn obviously made me upset as I just can't understand what's going on with me, I'm usually quite regular. But upon my crying my hubby was getting frustrated too saying what's the point of all this if you're not going to get yourself checked at the doctors - my response being I know they won't do anything until I have a few weird/missed cycles!! He is frustrated seeing my cry and is 'sick of comforting me' when honestly I don't see the comfort.
I just don't know what to do, I know this ttc journey would not be easy but not this stressful for both of us.

i mean he does kind of have a point OP

@safariled I just don't know what the doctors can do for me

maybe book an app to find out? 🤷

I think you should see a doctor, I had changes to my period after a MC and GP gave my a phone appointment after a few months trying again, she said they couldn’t do full fertility referral until it had been a year since the MC but she did refer me for hormone blood tests. If your cycles are that long, that warrants investigation

@Peonies12 thank you that is helpful 💛 it's difficult when going through this alone and really don't have anyone to talk to about these things. Atleast I know what to ask for now.

Have you ever been assessed for pcos?

Alongside nhs investigations

Which often take time..

I highly recommend

Hertility health..

... 150 gbp very well spent
.plus you can transfer your results from ( private) HH
To NHS records..

Money very well spent..
A great company

Are you taking supplements?
If so - which ?

Ive just had a 42 day cycle
.the 2 before were each 28 days ..

I have pcos

This cycle i took pregnacare for conception.
A week after stopping that - my body ovulated

Also -
How long since youve had your feretin tested ?
If feretin is low - ovulation can be delayed.

Good to ask gp to blood test feretin , b12 and vit d

I recommend the book - it starts with an egg

If you've been trying for over a year the GP will do some tests and will refer you onto a fertility clinic. We waited until we'd tried for over 12 months and went to our GP, initial tests came back fine so we were referred to a fertility clinic who then found multiple issues with us both. In the end we needed IVF and had our gorgeous little boy after our first round. The tests can take a while so it's best to get the ball rolling

Ttc is really tough, op. I’m so sorry about your losses. Your husband was out of order to speak to you in such a cruel way. If he is worried about your health he could broach the topic of a GP app in a compassionate way focussed on your health and well-being, rather than complaining about him feeling fed up with the prospect of offering you comfort when you are grieving and anxious about the future. Being pregnant and raising young children requires a huge amount of support from him too - I would hate to think he would resent you for needing support then as well? Sending a virtual hug x

@worldwidetravel2017 thank you for your replies, they're really helpful! I haven't, however I do suspect that it is something to do with that as I've had pretty bad hair loss since I was 17 (now almost 27) as well as hair growth on my face and body. What stopped me going to the doctors now is when I first noticed these changes I did have blood tests and supposedly things were normal and they couldn't do anything else, and I'm sure they didn't check my hormones, just iron and thyroid. As I was so young I didn't think to check up after anything and now well I'm struggling.
I have been taking proceive and vit D
Not had feretin tested in a while! Will ask for a hormone panel as well as those thank you so much.
And will also look into hertility..seems promising xx
Just so put off GP after my experiences

@fedupan thank you for your reply, will get the ball rolling now as it could be more underlying issues xx
Same happened to my friend and she has her ivf appointment next month x

Hair loss and facial hair / excess hair sounds very pcos.
( i get my chin waxed)

@Dryshampoofordays thank you for your message x
I think the issue is on both of our sides as I tend to shut him out when I'm very upset also, he did later apologise for the way he spoke and tell me he wants best for us. Communication needs to be better for us both x

I know it's really hard to hear, bit relaxing and accepting that the timing of any pg is out of your hands does help. I was ready to kill my GP after my mc saying similar after ttc for ages, but she was right.

The miscarriage association are really helpful for advice and support. Have a look on their website

@RedHelenB so I've been told 😂 but is a hard one to swallow esp bc it happened so quick the first time!

@Craftysue thank you I'll have a look x

Trying to conceive is so stressful and does put a lot of pressure on relationships. A lot of men can find it difficult to see their partner upset all of the time. They also feel upset but struggle with how to show it. Going to the doctors may be a step in the right direction as even some hormone blood tests might give you an indication as to what’s happening. I know the referral to gynaecology at the moment is about 6-12 months (depending on where you are), but I’d have your bloods done just to give you a little more insight and see if you can get a referral. Hope everything goes ok xx

@CardiVee yes it really does and the stress isn't helping either of us! Yes, we have decided to go to the doctors and then atleast we know where we're at with things and can go from there. Thank you xx