Erectile and ejaculation problems after miscarriage

[Cookiemg]

2 months ago we found out at our 12 week scan that we had lost our baby at 6 weeks. It has been a terrible time since then and I am desperate to conceive again. My DH has always had unpredictable erections and now they seem to be okay but he cannot ejaculate. He's very kindly agreed to try an assisted method where he ejaculates in to a cup and I gather his sperm into a syringe. I am at my wits end, I know that the situation and my reaction to it has created a huge amount of pressure and I cannot seem to control the drive to get pregnant and get rid of my inconsolessness. What if he cannot ejacualte this way?

dont know what to say as have no experience of the problem you mentined but did not want to ignore, i know the feeling you mean and u truly cant help it xx

You need to talk to your GP and get a referral to a psychosexual councellor. I referred a couple the other day who had had problems ejaculating since his partner has an ectopic pregnancy.

best of luck

You are having a bad time and it's bloody hard to recover from a miscarriage, I've had two and each time it's a massive knock and you just want to get pregnant again and feel it's the only way to feel normal again.

A couple of suggestions.

(1) Give up trying for two months - realistically delaying conception two months is not going to make that much of a difference to your lives except it'll give you both some grieving time. Spend the time focusing on being a couple again - there is precious little time with a baby in the house.

(2) You can buy a prostate massager if your DH is game (this does involve putting something up his bum) but this will definitely lead to ejaculation and often multiple ejaculations. It'll also help him keep his erection.

(3) I personally would try hypnoconception - you can buy a CD which trains you to relax about conception and that can stop you being so stressed (you won't get pregnant if you are so stressed anyway, if you focus on this being a problem your body will follow suit).

Remember this is all still very recent, it does get better over time - though it never goes away entirely. Hang in there.