Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Original poster

Anyone else hate trying for baby sex??

11 replies

Yepamilone · 18/08/2024 08:15

DH and I have been trying for baby no.2 for 6 months now with no luck so far. I have a very very high sex drive, as in want to have sex multiple times a day. When we were trying to get pregnant with DS (now 1.5 years old), the doctor told us to cut down on the amount of sex we were having for sperm quality reasons to increase chances of getting pregnant.

because we’re only having sex every other night now though I like to really take our time and go slow and it always starts that way until it ends up just fast and over quicker. Dh said to me last night I was quiet afterwards, did I not enjoy it and I did I just wanted to go slower. We preceded then to work out dates to have sex and it’s just so scheduled rather than just I need you now. It’s doing my head in.

OP posts:
Mrsttcno1 · 18/08/2024 08:20

Honestly OP, my advice, stop planning. Have sex when you want sex. If you’re having sex daily anyway you’re going to hit ovulation, so just drop the schedule and have sex when you want to x

Original poster
Yepamilone · 18/08/2024 08:40

@Mrsttcno1 would that not affect sperm quality?

OP posts:
fortheloveofcollies · 18/08/2024 08:49

Why don't you have sex more in your TWW? Doesn't matter about quality then. Then you can slow down after your period but you could still potentially have sex everyday then abstain for a couple of days pre fertile window to allow for quality build then go to every other day for the fertile window

Mrsttcno1 · 18/08/2024 08:50

Yepamilone · 18/08/2024 08:40

@Mrsttcno1 would that not affect sperm quality?

There’s really not much evidence either way, obviously feel free to do your own research though. We researched it ourselves when ttc and ended up just having sex when we wanted to rather than scheduled, I hated the thought sex would become another “job” to do, we have a perfectly healthy 4 month old now x

Original poster
Yepamilone · 18/08/2024 08:56

Mrsttcno1 · 18/08/2024 08:50

There’s really not much evidence either way, obviously feel free to do your own research though. We researched it ourselves when ttc and ended up just having sex when we wanted to rather than scheduled, I hated the thought sex would become another “job” to do, we have a perfectly healthy 4 month old now x

Show quote history

Do you mind me asking how often you were having sex?

OP posts:
Original poster
Yepamilone · 18/08/2024 08:58

fortheloveofcollies · 18/08/2024 08:49

Why don't you have sex more in your TWW? Doesn't matter about quality then. Then you can slow down after your period but you could still potentially have sex everyday then abstain for a couple of days pre fertile window to allow for quality build then go to every other day for the fertile window

Yeah it’s the abstaining bit is the issue. Were in that phase now and I’m so moody

OP posts:
sirensong · 18/08/2024 09:25

Quality is actually better when you have sex every day - it's count that reduces. But there would still be millions.

Count can vary a lot from person to person - maybe you could test it on a day after multiple sessions and see if it is still in good count range. If you do need to reduce it's only for a week. Almost the reverse of what many others do!

LuckysDadsHat · 18/08/2024 09:33

How do you find the time to have sex multiple times a day with a 1.5 year old?

Sex to conceive is a chore, and something I stopped doing in the end and just went with the flow of what we wanted (admittedly that wasn't several times a day!) I think you need to chill a bit more and find a happy medium that will work for you both.

Original poster
Yepamilone · 18/08/2024 09:43

LuckysDadsHat · 18/08/2024 09:33

How do you find the time to have sex multiple times a day with a 1.5 year old?

Sex to conceive is a chore, and something I stopped doing in the end and just went with the flow of what we wanted (admittedly that wasn't several times a day!) I think you need to chill a bit more and find a happy medium that will work for you both.

oh it isn’t happening multiple times a day. That’s what I would like. Usually just when we go to bed at night. DS is a good sleeper so we do get the nights to ourselves. DH is more strict on the every 2 days than I would be. My argument is that we’ve been doing that for 6 months and nothings happened yet so going as much as we want wouldn’t hurt

OP posts:
Mrsttcno1 · 18/08/2024 11:53

Yepamilone · 18/08/2024 08:56

Do you mind me asking how often you were having sex?

Show quote history

We were having sex pretty much every day, just when we fancied it. We were having sex regularly enough that there was never a need to schedule it. A schedule is only really needed if you would usually only have sex once a week or something because then you could obviously miss ovulation. Obviously if having sex daily or even every other day, you’re never going to miss ovulation so no need to plan x

moosey89 · 18/08/2024 12:03

So essentially, if you have sex multiple times a day, the count each time would be lower as there's less time between. But the total count over e.g. the week would be very similar, just more fluid 😂 ultimately there's not a lot of difference either way. If you usually have a lot of regular sex, so at least every other day, ditch the schedule, it's not needed!

New posts on this thread. Refresh page