I lost my beautiful little boy at 20 weeks 3 weeks ago. He was my first baby and I am beyond devastated. I went to see him and held his hand, it breaks my heart every time I picture him. I had on/off bleeding from 13 weeks which must have had something to do with it but I've had a lot of tests and they have all come back 'normal' so far, apart from TSH at 4.45. Also still waiting for PM. My partner has brought me on holiday in a beautiful hotel but I can't stop crying. I suppose I am looking for people who have been through the same and stories of hope. We want to TTC again as soon as I ovulate - I know it's soon but it's the only thing that gives me any comfort. I'm also 35 and terrified of my age and it happening again. Any stories of Hope much appreciated xx