Month 8 ttc..anyone else struggling,age 37,positive stories please

[Bex4567]

Hey I'm on month 8 ttc...I'm 37 I have a 17 and 13 year old from a previous relationship,and my partner has a 9 year.old..
I'm struggling every month staying positive.
Is anyone the same age and taken a while to conceive, how do u keep going

I came off the pill summer 2022 and spent the best part of 2023 TTC. I’m currently 10w+5 ☺️ Just had a reassurance scan as it’s my first and so far so good. I was 38 earlier this year. It’s so hard to keep going though. I just took it month by month

Oh really wow so what was that about 19 months did u ever have any testing ect...how did u keep going

I was 38 I think when we started trying, already have DD who was 15 then. Took me just over two years, nothing shown on tests but we hadn't had sperm analysis or anything in depth. Just gynea scan and bloods.
I'd had a couple of chemicals and one early miscarriage at 5.5 weeks then a few months after that managed it and gave birth at 40.

Was completely consumed with it all tbh. I tackled it like a mission, healthy as I could be and I'm not a huge exercise person so a lot of yoga and certain vitamins, very rarely had alcohol and little caffeine etc etc. Same for him.
Did a rough version of the SMEP as much as possible while temping.
Thing is I had too much time on my hands as had less work a lot of the time.

I decided no matter how many false starts, I wouldn't give up and tried to keep that determined feeling. Impossible to not think about it or relax or whatever advice was dished out.

It's possibly l think for me, an age thing, lower quality eggs so more chances of things not developing correctly due to abnormalities there's nothing to do about that so just a waiting game until a good egg gets fertilised and then hope for the best, it's all worth it if it goes to plan of course.

So hard though. Every day drags,let alone the months.

Hope you have success soon. I enjoyed every second of pregnancy (even though so so sick) and having my lovely DD now so that feels like forever ago now.

Thankyou for your comment I get days where I'm OK and then go down again..its hard as everyone around me is pregnant or announced they are it seems to be all you see when you don't want to lol

I remember that! Babies and lovely happy pregnant women everywhere all of a sudden.
I was so sure it would happen that didn't bother me so much actually.
Not sure why I was so sure of myself. I should have been more worried maybe.
I have a friend going through it now and she cannot hear anything related to it. She's really struggling to be positive and it's hard to see. I can't talk about my baby with her even it's so sad.
It'll be ok, it's just so so common to take longer when a bit older. Far too soon to lose hope yet.
Mumsnet was a big help. I was always reading the TTC boards and seeing people trying long term getting their BFPs and I was just waiting for my turn.

Did you conceive quickly with your other children? I found it harder at 38 than I did with my first two (32) and (35) … but I was doing a loose “girl sway” and leaving a cut off … first month I got the clear blue ovulation test I fell pregnant. They can be helpful when you are are bit older as your ovulation can start to move around the month a bit, even if you’ve previously been very regular. Good luck! Unfollow anything triggering and remember many women are having babies over 40 now, so you have time.

Thankyou I concvered with my daughter straight away at 20 and then my son took 6 months and that was when I wasn't trying coz I didn't want a December baby, we did it once lol...now I have 2 December babies lol 🤦‍♀️.I was 24 when I had my son so a big gap from where I am now..I'm so worried somethings wrong .maybe I'll try the clear blue test then I've literally tried everything else 🤦‍♀️

Thankypu for your nice words hoping it happens soon

I’m still trying too at 39
I’m one ahead of you cycle 9
feel af coming though and stared spotting so will be starting 10th cycle.
im trying not to let it obsess me too much, i was actually more obsessed months 1-6, i seem to be a bit more relaxed recently.
hope to see your bfp really soon 🤞🏻🤞🏻

I do feel less stressed as time goes on from what I used to be...kind of a given up vibe lol...but I'm more concerned there's something wrong with me..and so scared to go for tests..I've booked in bloods next month but so scared to go have u had any tests

I’ve had day 21 ovulation which was fine and that’s it.
I’ve mentioned to dp about sperm but I’m kind of leaving it up to him to decide

Have u had any other basic bloods,thyroid ect

Go to your GP and say you've been trying for a year. I know that's a little bit of a fib but it's a good idea to get things moving just in case. I should have probably gone sooner. I went to my GP about something else and just happened to mention that it wasn't happening for us.

It took 3 and a half years to conceive our first baby. I'd been on Clomid and we had had fertility investigations. I had one blocked and one partially blocked tube as it turned out - the force of the dye in the lap unblocked them. I got pregnant straight away at 33. Conceived again 2nd month ttc at 35. Took 7 months to conceive at 37 and miscarried. 3 months at 38 but miscarried again. Got pregnant immediately after that miscarriage and gave birth aged 40. I was post menopause by 45.

It's such a random thing! You just don't know. I was taking Agnus Castus while ttc and when I got pregnant after the two miscarriages, I had 'baby' asprin and progesterone support.

Don't give up hope! x

Thankyou..we don't qualify for any treatment on nhs as u have a 17 year old and 13 year old which I had when I was younger.. and my partner has a 9 year old...so I've got bloods booked in next month and 21 day bloods to see if I've ovulate but that's about it...we can't get referred on the nhs as we both have kids

Where I had been on the pill for so long periods and ovulation was all over the shop for the first 6 months (no bleeding at all until Feb 2023) so I sort of wrote those months off

I also had a lot of therapy and help at a younger age to help with my mental health and I genuinely believe that was the only way I managed to get through it without anything more than slight disappointment. Because of my illness triggers I have to be able to detach and think logically else I can spiral. I kind of went with the it will happen if it’s meant to or we will go to the Drs and start another journey. There was no point stressing myself over something I couldn’t control (another trigger!)

We were actually going to go to the GP this month had nothing happened

If it’s really getting you down maybe think about talking to someone. It may help

Hi, I'm in a similar situation- 37, ttc for over a year. I have a 2 year old which was conceived very easily.
I'm using clear blue advanced and cheap strip ones. I'm a bit irregular but not anything crazy. (Cycles 30-34 days long)

I do wonder if we're having enough sex. How often are you having sex? Focused when you get a positive? Or all month? I already feel a bit burnt out by it. X

We're doing it every other day when I finish my period up to my next one so its not that we're not doing enough...its just hard I went to gp the other day and they said over 35 it can take up to 2 years....having bloods end if month but so scared something wrong hopefully its a quick fix or nothings wrong

It’s hard OP… I’m 10 months in and coming up to my 38th birthday soon which was the original cut off that I set. We had a MMC in January at 8 weeks that was very sad… but it gives me hope that we can conceive so have to just keep going. I am hearing pregnancy announcements everywhere and never thought it would be so hard as I conceived aged 26 first time. But clearly it just gets harder as you get older.
like you I’m probably more relaxed as time goes on. I’ve actually dropped the temping and the OPKs because they were stressing me out. The arrival of spring makes me realise that it’s almost a year and I have been fixated on TTC all this time - not paying attention to much else which makes me sad. Hope it happens soon for you.

I'm 39 and have been ttc for 14 months- think we are on something like cycle 16. I conceived first try with my older 2 with ex husband. I was 23 and 27 then. Dh had a vasectomy reversal last year as he has 2 children too. We went to the GP 6 months after reversal and have had bloods, semen analysis and I had a HSG last week all on NHS through fertility clinic. Won't qualify for IVF due to children but will go abroad if we need it. All tests have come back clear and we had a chemical last month. Ovulating today so got everything crossed for this cycle.
Definitely see GP for referral.

@teampacey with the nhs criteria do you know if the time ‘resets’ if you’ve had a miscarriage? My gp
told me I would be referred in May (told me around Oct) but I then had a MMC at 8 weeks in Jan.

I'm not too sure tbh. I told the cons about my chemical on Friday and he didn't seem phased and said he would see me in 4 months but I don't know if that's cos I'm already under him. I would chase with your gp. We did referral July and had a letter about our appointment about August time with first app in Oct

You tierd the clear blue ovulation test? Tried for a year and fell first month using these.

We've been trying for our first for 14 months, I'm 36. Finding it so, so hard to stay positive! First 6 months were torture, I have managed to relax since then but more in a "what's the point it's not happening" way rather than actually relaxed 🤦‍♀️ new to mumsnet (although I have been reading the threads since we started trying, just never posted) but wanting to chat to others in the same crappy boat ❤️ we are in the process of being referred as I've been off the pill for 2 years now, I've my bloods just waiting for husbands SA appt to come through.
Any tips for staying positive would be most welcome ❤️

It's nice to see positive stories. I'm hoping to be one soon. I'm 36, been trying for 11 cycles. We've had 2 chemical/early losses, one on father's Day and the other one my son's birthday. But I'm trying to see it as proof we can conceive and just wait for the bfp that sticks.

My son (he's 6) was a first time lucky pregnancy so I didn't expect it to take this long second time round, but I guess 6-7 years changes things.

I have started taking CoQ10 and B6 because I've read good stuff about both. Had bloods done and 21day progesterone too. All "normal" so hopefully it's just a matter of time. Hoping this thread turns into positive stories from all of us 🤞🏽🤞🏽

Hi, how is everyone getting on?

I'm due my period in a few days and from my symptoms I can already tell I'm out this month!
I really thought this month could be the 1!

I'm trying hard to stay positive, but I'm struggling with the disappointment every month!