When to plan a 2nd child?

[stripeq]

Theoretically, because of course we have no idea how long it would take to conceive a 2nd child...

Would you rather have a 3/3.5 year age gap or 4/4.5 year? Not sure if it would be better or worse having a new baby around the time of the eldest starting school?!

I didn’t think of it in terms of age gaps, but more about when No1 gave me enough space to have the mental capacity for No2.

we ended up with a 3.5 yr gap. Which is fine.

4/4.5 definitely as then you get a decent maternity leave at home with just new baby while eldest is at school

Have just over 2 years between mine, which was fine......

Thanks for the replies!

DS is 2y3m, I always thought I'd want to try again this summer so he'd be around 3.5 at the earliest. But now the months are rolling by I'm second guessing whether it's the right time for us or if we should wait another year.

All down to your individual preferences.

By the time 2nd arrives they'll be 2yr2months apart. I can't say for certain this is best arrangement but it's just how things panned out.

I have friends with a smaller age gap, and friends with much wider gap.

I am 8 weeks pregnant with #2 and DD will have just turned 3 when baby is born. I’m really pleased with how it’s panned out as she will be entitled to 30 hours at preschool so I’ll have plenty of time to bond with baby, but the gap isn’t too big for them to be close growing up and having vaguely similar interests
(For context, there are 9 years between me and my brother and we are not close at all!)

16 months gap for my two. Fine here too. Didn't want to wait too long. First try both times. Very lucky. Wasn't expecting it.

I think there are positives and negatives to all age gaps. We're about to have our second and our dd is 3.5
Feels like a nice gap as she understands what's happening and is excited. She's well settled in nursery, she goes every afternoon which means I'll have some time each day just with baby but also get to spend more time with dd whilst on mat leave.

I was just turned 5 and started school the same month my younger sister was born. My mum has always said I was really helpful and the big age gap hasn't stopped us being really close.

As you say it's hard to know how long conception will take but if your gut is telling you to wait longer you should trust yourself! We didn't feel ready to start trying again until dd was 2.5