Should I test by myself?

[BeckyPfromLeeds]

Hi all,

This is out first.month ttc our first baby with me just turning 42. I have been having symptoms of peri-menopause (which I am being tested for) but I think we may have fallen the first month. As my af is all over the place I am bot sure when to test. I've been tracking my cycles for years and it says I have a 31 day cycle so not due until 1st Feb.

However, I had a very short af on 1st Jan which was 2 days of spotting with 1 day in the middle with red blood. I used a tampon on the middle day, even time I changed, there wasn't hardly anything on it. So I am now thinking it could have been implantation bleeding.

My question us when I test, should I do it on my own or tell my OH? I think he is feeling the pressure already so I don't want to put more on with a negative. What do you all think? X x

Implantation bleeding is uncommon - despite what people believe. And those who do have it, it's so light it's barely noticeable.

Heavier bleeds can happen of course, due to cervical changes.

If you want to test go for. You can buy some for as cheap as £1. Not like testing will do any harm.

my husband and I have said that we would always test together. I would feel so bad if it was positive and he wasn’t there and if it’s negative he is there to console me. It has also meant that I have not become an avid tester over the last 8 months of trying so it’s been really helpful from that perspective. I’ve actually only tested three times during our ttc journey. But that’s just us, everyone is different! Good luck sending you lots of baby dust ✨

I always just text by myself if it gets to the stage I test (which isn't often!). I don't like making a big deal about it, makes it feel more dramatic if my partner gets involved. I tell him later on in the day if I got a negative and it makes me sad.

@Outliers I have heard it can be either light or slightly heavy. There is also a possibility that the day or two of light bleeding was a period and I ovulated around 13th Jan.

I have been having cramps for for a while now and I don't normally have them unless I am on my period. I also have a really full feeling in my uterus area and I feel really bloated. I am a larger girl that has a big stomach and it is normally really squishy, but with this bloating, i feel like I can't even breathe it in!! I know something doesn't feel normal, I just have a feeling.

I think I might ask my OH if he wants to be there first and take it from there. I have a few tests but i am worried i will become a serial tester so maybe having him there will stop me 😂😂

I am the prime candidate to be a serial tester and I just don’t think that would be good for me so I’m pleased that we have the system we have and I think it has saved me a lot of heartache ❤️‍🩹

I had a dc at 43...we ttc again at 44 but had 3 chemicals... I didn't tell dh when I did the tests to save him the disappointment.. With ds I did the test alone.. Needed to absorb the enormity first!

I asked my OH earlier and he said he only wants to know when it's positive. Looks like I might be testing in the morning 😱

I never told DH I was testing when we were TTC (only did it a few times over 3 years, personally I think early testing every month is a road to heartbreak). When I finally got a positive I took 24 hours to absorb it myself before I told him.

I think that's what I will do. It will save him the heartache. Plus he knows what a serial tester i will be 😂😂

Once i get my bfp, I'll put a little package together with a positive digital, some baby things and a card saying daddy 👨

@BeckyPfromLeeds did you test?

I haven't tested yet. Something definitely doesn't feel right (as in don't feel like AF I'd coming). I think I might test in the morning. Thanks for asking @Grace185 x x

Just tested and it was BFN which I kinda expected. Something doesn't feel right so will test again on Monday. I'm not out til AF arrives 😁

Are you doing ovulation testing and tracking? At 42 and with irregular cycles I wouldn’t mess around and would make sure you know the dates that you need to have sex. The more expensive clear blue ones worked for me.

I track my cycles in an app as I have done for 6 years and also make note of my CM. I didn't want to jump straight in with OPK's in the first month as I have obsessive tendencies. If/when AF doesn't show up, I will start using them as I have already bought some easy @ home ones x x