Is anyone thinking of TTC a third?

[2or3whatsittobe]

I can’t stop thinking about whether or not we should TTC a third child. We have two DC already, 3.5 and nine months. I don’t want to start to TTC yet as I wouldn’t want an 18 month age gap, but if we were to have a third I like the idea of a 2 year age gap and since it took us a year to conceive both kids I feel like we should start sooner rather than later.

Is anyone else thinking of TTC or currently TTC and if so what has made you decide to go for a third instead of stick at two?

Took us nearly a year each time with both my two boys and we had the same thought process. Started trying when my youngest was 10 months old thinking surely it won’t happen quickly. It happened 2nd cycle!!!! And we dtd 3 days before ovulation, to say we were both shocked is an understatement.

Yes me! I literally got my coil removed today after months of deliberating. We decided to go with our hearts and not to over-think/worry too much. Our reasons for 'not' were all quite short term reasons and we both knew that we wanted a bigger family in the future. It will be hard but now that we have finally decided i am so excited!

The wondering what to do and analysing everything is hard. I'm sure you'll come to your own decision in time xx

@L00k4m3x ahh brilliant, was obviously meant to be! How have you found the age gap? Or is DC3 not here yet?

@pleurotus Ooh that is exciting!fingers crossed for you. How old are your other two?

Meeee🙋🏼‍♀️ I have a 6 year old and 3 year old and stopped taking my mini pill 12 days ago, really thought we were done after two but here we are again!

After 26 months agonising, we are on our second cycle now of ttc number 3!

I’m one of 3 and have always wanted 3. I told DH this on our second date and he said he only wanted 1/2… so the debate started! My first was NOT an easy baby, in every way. And after her, I was more open to only 2. For lots of reasons. I had been very ill in pregnancy, I was aware that having 3 meant less time and energy for each child, and suddenly having my gorgeous daughter be real in front of me, it felt like a third would just be taking away from her.

During my second pregnancy with my son, I was very very ill again and thought I can never do this again. In fact, the first thing I said after he was born is “thank F* I never have to do that again!”… but then day 3 hit… and my son was such an easy baby in comparison and fitted in so easily and my daughter utterly adored him from day one… and I looked at them both and this deep longing in my stomach said “this can’t be my last baby!”. So I agonised over it for a long time, constantly googling having 3 etc DH wasn’t keen. Head wise obviously having 2 makes more sense in nearly every way, but the longing for one more and the desire for my children to have another sibling for life, just got louder.

Then last spring I fell pregnant by one fluke five days before I ovulated! Sadly I had an early miscarriage but that led to DH and I to have a proper conversation. He said he’s content with 2 but if it’s this important to me, he’s happy to have another.

I’m now terrified! And question if this is mad, but am just going with it. Just one more time. I definitively don’t want anymore!!

(and a puppy one day though!)

@Applesandcake I know what you mean, logically I know a third isn’t a great idea but the heart wants what it wants. Sorry about your miscarriage and good luck with TTC! Don’t get a puppy though, they’re harder worker than children honestly.

Ha! Yes, I had a puppy before children and certainly I'd choose snuggly newborn over a puppy in terms of which is easier every time! I was a dog trainer for a while though, so love the challege.

I would like a dog one day again though, I always wanted one as a child and love the idea of my kids having that experience... but not until future number 3 is in school!

We have two dogs, both 10 so they pre date kids by a few years. It is lovely but I do think you’re wise to wait, I think the combo of babies / toddlers and dogs is a hard one. So many advantages to growing up with a dog though, I shouldn’t really complain about them.

Yes I was but wasn’t in gods plans after 7 loses I’ve accepted at 43 my two are all I need. X

Yeah, my puppy turned into a dog! She adored my children but god she made life so much harder. She sadly passed this summer and although completely broken, I can’t deny it’s easier in some ways now she’s gone. I’m hoping once we’re past the toddler phase, a dog will be easier again!

sort of, I mean we are not TTC. but keep thinking about a 3rd.

We keep making the decision to TTC for baby 3, and then change our minds, and back and forth and back and forth. Our children are nearly 4yo and 20mo, we would have liked the same age gap again but we've already missed that boat and I have no idea what a bigger gap would be like (but friends of ours who have children the same age as our eldest and newborns seem to be finding it very hard with jealousy/attention needed, whereas I found that aspect very easy with my eldest being so young).

Just jumping on this thread. Also looking to ttc baby number 3. Only issue for me is I have no idea when I ovulate. My cycle has never been the same really since after having my second boy. I range from day 25 to day 37 or 38. It also took us about 18 months to conceive last time. My eldest is 11 next week and my youngest is five.

They are 6 + 2.5. It's now or never to be honest as I don't want too big a gap. If nothing happens by late summer I think we will count our chickens and stop trying.

@Essie274 yeah I think we want a small age gap if we do decide on a third which is why I feel like we need to decide sooner rather than later

It is so hard to decide. Some days I feel we are missing a 'piece' of our family, other days I feel so overwhelmed with what we have and don't know if I'd be silly to add another. My heart definitely would love one more, but not sure if it is sensible. And very sensible DH sees much more of the logistical stuff than I do.