TTC for 9 months with no luck considering IVF

[SamWalks]

Hi all,

I am a 35 year old female, got married back in May. Hubby and I decided to try getting pregnant straightaway. We have had no luck so far, last month we went for testing (borderline moderate/low AMH for my age group) but nothing structurally concerning. The fertility doctor told me to try fertility treatments if I did not conceive this month.

Just wondered if anyone else has had a similar journey, and did you go straight to fertility treatments? Considering if I should wait the year or go straight to IVF.

just feeling very overwhelmed and sad 😢

Why do you want to go straight to IVF?
it’s pretty intense and invasive and there are other options like IUI

Btw I was older and found the whole process of trying to conceive so pressured and stressful.
i actually conceived relatively quickly in real world terms but i cried more than once and had started the process of fertility testing as i was 37/38.

i also felt like the whole bloody world was pregnant and I wasn’t - it’s hard.

32 and got pregnant on month 10 of trying. We were just starting to look at fertility treatment options too. I would say, get your name on the waiting list asap and, in the meantime, keep trying. Good luck 🤞🏻

(We finally had luck the month we stopped trying!)

I started trying at 32, ended up going down the ivf route at 35, by 40 I gave up and accepted being childless.

I know several people who tried several (failed) iui before having success with ivf. From my experience at your age, crack on with the ivf. Good luck 🤞

I would only consider IVF as absolute last resort. It’s incredibly hard work, invasive and emotionally intense. Are there lifestyle changes you can try first? Acupuncture? 9 months at your age isn’t much to worry about.

Honestly, I would avoid it if you can. It's intrusive, invasive and extremely traumatic. My eldest is 5. It took 7 years of fertility treatments to have her. I still carry the truma of the treatment with me. Having children doesn't erase it. It's also extremely hard on relationships. Have you tracked your cycle? Have you had sex every other day? Have you both tried the fertility diet? Has DH had his sperm checked? Acupuncture was also helpful.

9montha is honestly not that long. So many of my friends took 12-18months to conceive

Thanks everyone for your messages.

I think the borderline moderate/low AMH had me worried, I feel like I’m running out of time!

My DH already has a daughter from a previous relationship (so assuming he is all good) but he is booked in for testing this week.

I have tracked my ovulation, even when I went to see the fertility specialist he said he could see an emerging cyst from one of my follicles which confirms I’m ovulating. However, my periods are irregular (24-30 days) and I have struggled to find my LH when testing. I have opted to have sex everyday/other day some months.

tbh im just over this whole process, I can’t deal with the waiting and anxiety and testing and disappointment. Just want to crack on, even turned down a promotion at work because it all just got too much.

I have gone to the nhs - waiting for my GP to refer me, but they’ve said 2 years of trying before you’re eligible for IVF. I don’t want to try IUI the fertility doctor said 15% of success at my age, it just seems the odds are not in my favour.

Worth reviewing your DHs lifestyle

Are you and your DH on prenatal vitamins?
we just got the his n hers “wellperson” ones.

i also took a good daily dose of CoQ10.

weird about IUI. I work in tech so older cohort and it’s fairly successful… 4 women I know did that they have between 1-3 children each) it may just be anecdotal 🤷🏻‍♀️

We are both on vitamins, it’s difficult to get him to stay consistent. We’ve both changed our diet. I started CoQ10 this month.

going to wait for DH test results and see where we are at from there

Have you checked your local NHS trust guidelines for referrals? Ours was trying for 6months if over 35 and then you could be referred. 1year if you were under 35. 2years sounds very long - are you sure the doctor wasnt talking about waiting lists for IVF rather than referrals? But you may not qualify for NHS treatment if your DH already has a child as some trusts have criteria that say either partner cannot have existing children. So also worth doing your research into your local eligibility. No point waiting for a referral if you would need to go private anyway.

In any case, i agree with pp. There are lots of things to try before IVF, including IUI and ovulation induction which could work and are much less invasive. As well as checking your vitamins, if either of you are overweight, then getting down to a healthy weight, cutting out alcohol etc will make a huge difference. We needed fertility treatment for DD1 when i was 35 but we conceived DC2 naturally when i was 37 and im sure it isnt a coincidence that we had both lost 10% of our body weights in the 3 months before we conceived.

Although IUI has 15% success rate its worth trying. It is not remotely invasive compared to IVF and is much cheaper. I'd only do IVF as a last resort. Honestly, having done it I wouldn't recommend it nor would I chose to do it again. Although, I did IUI. Then ICSI. I had 2 fresh and 5 or 6 frozen cycles. I lost 4 babies from 2 pregnancies. My eldest was my last frozen embryo. I was suicidal by the end of it. Even the birth wasn't straightforward. Anyhow, following all that I suffered postnatal anxiety. Honestly, do your best to minimise the trauma. Have fertility counselling as well. I think it kept me just off the edge.

I had DD1 at 40 (following 7 years of treatment) and DD2 at 42 (no intervention).

Just as an alternative view, we had a late term loss, followed by a mmc and then 1.5years + of trying with no luck naturally before moving to IVF.

I found IVF so much less stressful - no ovulation tracking, no second guessing myself, just do what the doctor says. We then were lucky our first cycle and had remaining frozen embryos that produced DC2 on our next round. I found it way easier than the monitoring/ decisions and sex on demand.

So for me - I would say get cracking with IVF! but I didn't mind injecting myself and don't have particularly strong emotional reactions to hormones e.g. PMT

I highly Recommend paying150 gbp
To hertility health
Very comprehensive hormone and fertility private testing
Very fast
You can add results to NHS record

Have u had a full blood count recently?
And vit d - feretin and b12 tests ?
^ those 3 are all important

Are you healthy? - a good bmi / good weight?

Taking folic acid and vit d & eating fertility foods and iron rich foods ?

Exercising is 20 / 30 min a day ?