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Conception

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Original poster

When to TTC

8 replies

CharLou5 · 05/11/2023 15:58

So I know this is ultimately my decision but really wanted to see what others would do in our situation. I’ve just found out that my dad has incurable cancer, he’s about to start chemotherapy but has ultimately been told he’s likely only got about 2.5 years left.

I’m getting married in April 2025. We both really want a baby but always said we would wait until after the wedding just to make it easier. With the news about my Dad though, I’d love to know that he’d been able to meet my child before he passed away. We’re now considering coming off contraception and ‘seeing what happens’ as if we waited until after the wedding it’s likely my Dad won’t be around to meet them.

I suppose there’s no real answer here just a what would you do? Thank you :)

OP posts:
Flipdiddle · 05/11/2023 15:59

How old are you?

Flipdiddle · 05/11/2023 16:01

I am so sorry

I would focus on my dad. As you don’t know what pregnancy might be like for you.

but… if you’re mid thirties onwards, I’d start trying

Outliers · 05/11/2023 16:18

Bring the wedding forward if you can

Original poster
CharLou5 · 05/11/2023 16:22

We have played around with this idea too, need to speak to our venue as I’m a teacher so very limited on dates!

OP posts:
Original poster
CharLou5 · 05/11/2023 16:23

This is true - I’m 28 so there’s no ‘rush’ in that sense!

OP posts:
Jadeypie · 05/11/2023 20:05

We started trying to conceive in June after a loss in Jan we already have a beautiful two year old. august we found out my dad had cancer. Unfortunately we was at a stage that there was nothing they could do. It was a very stressful and hard time and I treasure just having the short 6 weeks to spend with him and not think about ttc or anything and I don't feel guilty that he won't get to meet my future child because I have plenty of memories to tell them. I do feel guilty that my lovely boy only got two years with him snd watching the heartache on my dads face knowing he was leaving him is somthing i will never forget Ttc is a hard journey if your not a lucky one first month trying, even then it's still stressful. Sorry to be a Debbie downer that's just my experience. I hope what ever you decide will be best for use. Sending you lots of love ❤️ it's not a nice thing to go through xx

Original poster
CharLou5 · 05/11/2023 22:12

@Jadeypie thank you for sharing this and I’m so sorry for your lose. The sadness of my Dad is maybe something we haven’t considered in our discussions etc so thank you for that xx

OP posts:
Flipdiddle · 06/11/2023 08:09

Outliers · 05/11/2023 16:18

Bring the wedding forward if you can

This.

I would make the wedding much smaller and very intimate. Everyone would understand if you’ve already issued invites.

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