Trying for baby number 2

[Mumtobe888]

Hello,
Im after some honest advice please on trying for baby number 2.
So I’m not sure if I’ve completely lost my mind but I’m 7 months PP and I can’t stop thinking about trying for another baby.
I grew up with five brothers (3 step brothers). I lost my mum when I was a week old and my dad when I was 19 and my family has never been the same since. I would really like a big loving family of my own. I have a few questions -

1. I was poorly towards the end of my pregnany, high heart rate, ICP and I felt Ryan biab all the time. Would this pregnancy be the same? As I know it’s not just me to think about anymore.
2. I know having two under two will be hard but would it be harder if my little one was a toddler with a new baby, jealousy etc.
3. would I feel guilty about my son not having me to himself anymore? (I also think I’d be giving him a friend for life)
4. I’m going back to work part time in September, could they fire me if I returned pregnant? I know it could take a long time to conceive but just wondering! sorry for the long post, any advice appreciated x

Ryan biab all the time. That should say rubbish all the time haha!

Gosh, I'm so sorry to hear about your parents, that's absolutely devastating.

I was obsessed with having another baby right from about 4 months PP and I did fall pregnant when my eldest was 11 months and again when that baby was 11 months 🙈

The pregnancies were uncomplicated medically but I was so flipping tired all the time and I felt like I didn't enjoy the baby years as much as I maybe could have. However I wouldn't change it! I loved having two babies and a toddler and as they've gotten older they all like the same things and the elder two are the same size so share clothes and shoes!

I am SUPER looking forward to having a new baby all to myself now though that the older three are in school.

As for work, they can't fire you but they may be a bit pissed off if you return already pregnant.

I think you do you

but check with your gp if you had a C-section etc

also babies can be pretty tough to deal with when they become mobile - you will be following them around everywhere all the time

so it will be tough. But of course people do it

Firstly consider the effect it will have on your body that is still recovering from your first birth. There's a reason why doctors recommend at least a year, ideally more. Pelvic floor health is a big one that could cause incontinence later down the line or even now if you had a bad cough. most women in the UK aren't really aware of their pelvic floor and if they have any prolapse after birth. recommend getting a 'mummy mot' by a women's health physio.

2. I absolutely loved having one kid but 2 is a whole different game, especially when the new baby is a few months old and is beginning to be active. you'll likely feel guilty for not having time to spend with the older one. mine were 2 years apart and I'm so grateful that finally the oldest is 3 and can entertain themselves while I care for the baby. you'll have 2 babies wanting and needing your constant attention.

3. cost of 2 in childcare at the same time.

I could probably write many more but I'll stop there for now.

I'd recommend enjoying your precious time with your current little one. there's plenty of time to give them a sibling if you'd like to in the future

oh yeah and 2 maternity leaves so close together may piss off your work but that's irrelevant. what might be more so is whether you'd qualify for maternity pay/smp which I doubt you would. you have to be back working a certain amount of time.

I have just had baby no2 8 days ago and I have a 16 month old. Both planned. We wanted ours closer together. My first day back at work I told them I was 9 weeks along. Really supportive. Go for it if it's what you both want to do.

One thing I will say is, I was super exhausted in the later stages of my pregnancy and my partner had to do most of the fun stuff with our toddler and I felt like I missed out. The mum guilt was terrible.

I don't regret it now though I have my two beautiful DC.

X