To wait or not to wait

[Itstime2023]

Hi all.

I have posted on another forum as well. Just looking for a few more opinions...

35, no children. Wanting to start trying. My husband and I said we will wait until after a big holiday we are having the state's April/May next year.

I just can't shake this feeling though that what if we did wait and then it took years to conceive. I keep thinking maybe we should try but then if we can't travel I don't want to smash my husband's bucket list trip into a million pieces. I mean I know the country isn't going anywhere 😂🤷‍♀️ So maybe we should just try. Does travel insurance cover for things like this if you were not able to travel due to pregnancy?

Any advice? So confused and can't stop thinking about it.

As a 37yr old who has just had a MMC I wouldn't wait personally. It might take months anyway and if it doesn't, it might not all go to plan. Sorry, not meaning to be a negative nelly but really, if you want kids, and you're already 35, make that the priority. As you say, holidays will wait. Pretty sure lots of insurers cover pregnancy, that would be something to check.

Obviously if all goes perfectly and you have a baby due next April/May then I'd count your blessings and plan another awesome holiday....

But obviously discuss all this with your hubby first!

Good luck!

I wouldn’t wait, at that age. You can always go on the trip but conceiving isn’t probably going to get any easier

I wouldn't wait just for a trip. Like you say the country isn't going anywhere. You never know what's going to come of pregnancy and fertility sometimes it's all good and other times it really isn't plain sailing

Also consider zika countries...

I would also send away for a Hertility home test which will give you a snapshot of where your levels are for about £150.

I’m going to give a different opinion, but I would wait until after your trip.
we started TTC when I was 34, I’m now 36 and a half and still no pregnancy. We did IVF at the beginning of this year which failed, but we have an embryo in storage waiting to be used. We chose to wait to use the embryo until the end of the year so we could have a couple of fantastic summer holidays and tick some big things off our list.

Now the reason I say wait until after your trip, is when I look back on the last couple of years, we’ve had some fantastic times on holidays, trips, house improvements, new cars, savings being topped up, which wouldn’t have happened if baby happened straight away. We found we had unexplained infertility when we went through all the standard tests and of course it’s been extremely difficult going through that, I’m also grateful for the life we’ve had along the way.

Your life can stop when you’re TTC. It’s easy to think you don’t want to miss the chance of having a baby NOW in case it’s your only opportunity, but it’s not. Your life is happening now. A bucket list holiday is a big deal, it’s your memories, it’s a lot of money, it’s your husbands dream.

You will face what you will face when you do decide to have a baby, but the chances are you’ll conceive naturally within a year anyway. Remember Mumsnet conception boards are full of women seeking answers and support and so it appears a lot of women struggle (me included) when really we are the minority. Chances are you’ll be in the majority.