TTC irregular periods & anxiety

[Milkyway23]

Hi everyone.
I came off the pill nearly a year ago, been actively ttc since new year. Is that a long time? I am a perfectionist and stupidly thought we'd find it easy! We don't smoke or drink and we're active people. Both early 30s.
My periods seem less regular than when I came off the pill, making it very difficult to work out whether I'm ovulating when I think I am.
The last 2 or 3 periods I've had, I seem to spot for a few days around 28 days but then 4-6 days later my period seems to ramp up - bright red and heavy for a few days. It feels like a long period all in all. I was on the pill for a long time so I suppose I don't know much about what normal periods are like but as I say they seemed kind of normal to me when I came off the pill last year.
I'm 32 and starting to worry I'm perimenpausal. Is that a sign? I know stress doesn't help but I am just starting to feel very low and like I could burst into tears all the time. I can't talk to anyone really because all my friends are pregnant or new mums or have their own stuff going on. I don't want to burden people.
I have a Dr's appt but couldn't get in until the end of the month. I'm not sure whether they'd offer me any help but I'm not even sure what sort of tests they could do. I have been shocked at how little I know about fertility really!
I never know what to do with myself - should I try to be less busy, to give my body a chance, or carry on being active? I have been trying not to do vigorous activity but then I feel like I'm gaining weight and exercise is good for my mental health.
I just want to know if you think its possible for me. I felt too busy until my 30s and all of a sudden I feel full of dread that I've wasted time and it's too late. Thanks!

I probably wouldn’t count the days you spot as a period. Some women spot before the have a period. Are you underweight or exercise too much? Those cause irregular ovulation and therefore irregular cycles. Try bbt charting to help figure out when you ovulate. There are lots of good guides online!

similar Situation here, I have cycles which vary 28-33 days. Been trying since Jan but have only started tracking ovulation recently. From the start I assumed it will take a year or more as that’s not unusual. We’ve been keeping our lives as usual, making plans, holiday, we’re buying a house at the moment. I think it’s important to keep other parts of your life busy. Hopefully GP can help

Thanks both.

How do you track ovulation? I use an app but I'm not sure what counts as the start of my period! So for all I know the calculations are way off (I think, maybe i ovulate way earlier or later than I think?) I used some cheap sticks which I'm not convinced worked.. unless I was just way off! And I've not tried taking my temperature.
Has anyone found a good ovulation measure?

I'm not underweight or over exercising but my diet could be better as I've done a bit of stress eating here and there!.. I generally rush around alot too.

It's the stress of thinking I'll miss that short window. In general we're busy, I don't want to waste the year away worrying about it, it just seems quick and easy for everyone around me but I suppose you never know. Does relaxing help 😂 x

I have nothing to add except I'm in the exact same situation!
Also 32, came off pill almost a year ago, period seemed fine but now it all over the place with cycle length and period heaviness. Spotting some days so not sure what Is and isn't the period.
Doesn't make TTC easy although I only started a few months ago.

Hi @Milkyway23
I've spent the last 1.5 years learning to track my cycle closely - starting off by ttc in a casual way, nothing happening, and then learning more and more about how track my cycle as it's irregular and I really wanted to fall pregnant! I've just found out endometriosis has blocked my fallopian tubes so the egg can't get throughout - makes sense!

But I thought I'd share what's worked for me as I've actually really enjoyed getting to know my cycle so closely and track the way it affects my moods, energy levels, etc

Firstly I take notice of my cervical mucus consistency. For me, around 4 days before I ovulate I will notice the consistency changes to be like 'raw egg white'. You can stretch it between your fingers... Google it if you need more info on it :)
Once I notice the mucus change I'll start using ovulation predictor tests - I buy cheap ones online. I'll test daily until I get a peak test (test line darker or as dark as the control line)

I also track my basal body temperature - BBT rises after ovulation so once I see the rise that confirms the ovulation day, and I know I will be due for my period 14 days later. I use the fertility friend app for tracking my BBT - it's really old school but I think it's great for tracking your temperature

I hope this info helps and best of luck :)

Get out early in the morning, get bright light in your eyes, this increases FSH levels which assists in ovulation. Even better go on holidays, gets tonnes of sunshine, feel good, have loads of sex.

i feel like I could have written this myself!

I came off the pill in October last year. Pre-pill my cycle was so predictable but now it can range from 28-36 days, and I also seem to get spotting from day 28 onwards, so it feels like a longgg period.

I count CD1 as the day the full flow starts, which seems to be most accurate.

I also use ovulation tests but only had one very clear positive result in April - and I then proceeded to spot every day until af came :(

this month I’ve started taking proceive, and my gp has recommended me for a progesterone test to see if I’ve ovulated or not. The tricky part is, the test has to be done 7 days before your period. when your cycle length varies, it makes it almost impossible.

Stress definitely doesn’t help but I find it so hard to stay calm - I’ve also panicked that I’m perimenopausal (I turned 30 in March) but it seems like quite a few women experience this, so Im trying not to think that way.

I think the gp will likely recommend you for the progesterone test too, as that seems to be the first step