I'm just so frustrated!!!

[Whyyyy]

DH and I have been TTC for about a year now and getting nowhere.
He has a medical condition which basically prevents us from DTD as much as we would like. Realistically we can do it maybe once every two weeks. This condition is likely to get better in another year (purposely being vague here!).

The thing is, we have a 6 year old and I'm already stressed about the age gap. We're both mid 30s and there is a good chance I'll be out of a job in about a year's time or so so feeling major time pressure.

Every single month I am doing pregnancy tests and I'm gutted. Every boob twinge has me hopeful. Every mild cramp I am hopeful (had these with DS) etc etc.

Sooner or later we'll probably just stop trying. I wouldn't change my family for anything in the world and if it is just going to be the three of us, I can cope with that. It's just the fact that it's currently an unknown. Will it won't it happen?

My SIL is pregnant ATM and they also have a 3 year old so that's twice I've watched her go through a pregnancy and I've felt so happy for her, but a part of me is heartbroken. Why her and not me?

Sorry I really needed to vent. I know no one can do anything. I can't change most of the above. I need to change my mindset. FFS!

So sorry your going through this. That sounds tough.

I really don't think frequency matters as much as timing. (Having it more is extra but it only takes one!)

are you tracking your cycle to know if you are doing it at the right time?
and sorry I obviously don't know much about the condition but is DH able to do it your day of choosing or spontaneous ?

Are you tracking to maximize your chances?

Would assisted conception be feasible?

I am trying to track my cycles. I never had to do it for DS, he appeared almost instantly!

DHs condition is really limiting and while we can plan to do it on X day, it can flare up and suddenly either he can't do it at all or he can't finish due to pain. So in the past we've aimed for 'high chance days' but then he can't and then we can't do it again for 2 weeks or so until he recovers.

I suggested we try manual insemination (if that's the right phrase!) but he said that makes him feel really uncomfortable and useless.
He's struggling mentally with a lot of this too and gets in his head about it.

100 percent understand his feelings there - It's that society pressure of 'being a man'
total rubbish though - sometimes with conception it's about the end goal. Whether through ivf or whatever!

I think tracking is the place to start because apps 'high chances' are not accurate alone. I ovulate late and if I went by an app I'd never fall pregnant.

If that doesn't work then support to do so manually will be perhaps the only way unfortunately .

Definitely buy some ovulation tests, you can buy big packs of the strips, no need to spend a fortune on the ones from boots.

We have been trying for 6months. Situation is getting worst day by day. My period is regular. My husband's semen is fair enough. What should I do!