Delaying TTC to avoid winter/Xmas baby?

[CinderRosie]

DH and I have agreed we are ready to TTC. We are both 36 which may have some bearing on the responses on this thread. I already have a teenage DC from previous relationship who has a mid-November birthday. If I was lucky enough to fall pregnant this cycle or on the next few cycles I’d be due between end of October and the end of December. I remember DS being born and us going straight into a long cold winter and I felt claustrophobic with the dark, short days. Getting up for night feeds was awful. I’d much prefer to wait and TTC in 3 months time when my due date would be the end January next year (again, if we were lucky enough to fall pregnant first cycle). January is still winter but the days are getting longer and brighter and spring is just around the corner and I feel my mental health would be a lot better. We also have a LOT of family birthdays in November and then December is all Christmas. But, I am 36 and time is of the essence. Am I being silly and should we just start now?

As someone with two losses, I couldn't care less. It's a luxury to be worrying about baby's birth month.
Just go for it.

I would just crack on. I know entirely what you are saying, my baby was born in august last year so I was heavily pregnant during that god awful heatwave and IT WAS HELL 😂 so I said bloody hell next time I will try to avoid that. That being said, in reality I don't think I would (if we try for baby #2) as you never know how long it will take. I know several people who were in their 30s who TTC for a year-18months, by which time it wouldn't matter when you started trying. Also at age 36 I hear fertility is on the decline. I'm 32 so by time we try for next one I am likely to be similar age!

I have just had a November baby after two summer ones. I thought the same but actually I'm quite glad that we will be able to go to the park and play in the garden when he is a bit more interactive at 6m+. So far I'm quite happy to do the newborn feeds and snuggles in front of the tv and don't feel Im wasting the day so much as if it was lovely outside.

We do get out but can wrap him up well and will be nicer to let him move around in less restrictive clothes in the summer.

I also wouldn't wait, the baby's birthday season is much less important than making sure you make the full use of the time you have to conceive.

If I were you I'd just get on with it. I started trying to conceive was I was 36. Fast forward 2.5 years, not even a whisper of a pregnancy, and a failed cycle of IVF under my belt.

The statistics say that 90% of women your age will conceive within 2 years of regular sex, so I don't mean to scare you and the odds are in your favour. But you could be in my unlucky 10% group. If you want a child, just go for it. Very best of luck.

I have 2 summer babies and 1 end of November baby, and honestly, the winter one was the best. I had an excuse to stay home because of the cold and wet weather, for the first few months and enjoy those newborn cuddles 🥰 with summer babies, friends and family were inviting us out only a few days after baby was born and got arsy when we declined!

This was me last year actively avoided trying to avoid an Xmas baby how silly I was it really upsets me now to think how ridiculous I was and time I wasted even though I know why I didn't want an Xmas baby in the grand scheme of things does it even matter. 14 months on from first starting TTC still trying and now being referred to a fertility clinic no idea what the future holds. don't waste time , I would have a baby Xmas day if I could now !

I have a January birthday and it's fucking horrible.

My son is early November and I didn't experience anything like you've mentioned.

It's completely up to you and totally personal but I loved having a winter baby. We were all cosy and hibernating, then when she was a bit older and I was more with it, we did loads of days out and made the most of the weather. I've had a summer baby too and being pregnant in the heat was the actual worst thing I've ever endured. He is also the youngest in his school year, which people will tell you to avoid too. On balance I'd go winter!

Took me 9 years to conceive my second.At your age I wouldn't be picky about seasons .

Personally I wouldn't worry . If you don't want a winter newborn don't let strangers stress you into thinking you must get pregnant yesterday just because of your age.

I'm 36 with a 9month DD (conceived 1st cycle). We'll start TTC no2 around her 1st birthday which would mean a Feb/March birthday.

Im an autumn birthday, DH a summer. I really wanted a Christmas DC but has a c-section so waiting at least a year. Do what's best for you

I wouldn't, it took me a few years to conceive and my babies both ended up being winter/Christmas babies. It was lovely having the 4th trimester cosy at home. I did lots of breastfeeding whilst watching boxsets under a duvet with Christmas chocolates and not feeling I was missing any nice weather. I didn't get too hot with a baby sling wrapped round me when I did go out for a walk. Now they're older and both love having special Christmas time birthdays, one is before and one is just after. We also can save up for Christmas and Birthdays in one lump and then breathe a sigh of relief for the rest of the year!

As a mum of two winter babies I Totally get where your coming from. After having my first I tried to get pregnant again (around your age) and thought we had all the time in the world and could choose when it happened but 3 miscarriages later all I wanted was a healthy baby and timing didn't matter anymore. I got pregnant again and My beautiful bundle arrived just before Christmas and there was something so magical about having a baby then. There are so may factors that all have to align to get pregnant in first place and for it to be a healthy pregnancy. Knowing what I know now I personally wouldn't delay but we are all different and you have to do what feels right for you situation.

DS is April. It was perfect. We had the spring and summer going to baby groups when he was 2/3/4/5 months old and Christmas at 8 months when he was interested in some toys.

I remember wanting to delay a winter baby…. Five years later I’m still trying and not so bothered about when (or if) one is ever born. I’m also 36.

I used to think this and then thought, what if I miss my chance? So many factors have to line up.. With no fertility issues two 20 something year olds have about a 20% to conceive and that's if they try at the right time of the cycle so I just didn't want to lose any chances to try..
There's pros and cons to every month if you think about it enough...

My first was a late autumn baby and I really struggled over the winter. It did get me quite down. Second time round we did exactly as you’re thinking and waited ttc until February due date (and were lucky as it happened quickly for us). I much much preferred it as the days are getting lighter and you have all of spring and summer ahead.

I feel a bit this way, we're currently TTC #2, DD was an April baby which was a nice time of year to have her. I've had a few friends and family who have had December babies and it's always been a bit tricky with birthdays so close to Christmas. Christmas is expensive enough without a birthday in the mix too! Even my friend who has a January baby says it's hard thinking of things to buy for DC when they've just got lots of new things for Christmas. Realistically it's only one maybe 2 cycles that you're taking a break for, though if your maybe still trying this time next year then id probably say beggars can't be choosers and to just get on with it. At the end of the day a baby is a precious gift whoever they're born

Same. I also think there are benefits and downsides of every month for having a baby. Autumn/Winter babies are older in their year and I read they can have an advantage at school, and socially when they're older, and I found keeping a baby warm easier than trying to cool them down. I would've hated to have a newborn during the 40oC heatwave we had last summer. Plus if it doesn't happen immediately you could end up whenever anyway! I don't think it's an unreasonable or silly idea at all but I wouldn't personally bother. Completely up to you though OP x

I started TTC at 34, so younger than you, I finally had my daughter at age 41 (and a half). How important is a birth date to you? Would you rather not have a child than a winter baby?

Well at your age I would crack on. You don't really have any control over when you will fall pregnant or if baby might be premature. My DS was due in March, came in January.

I started trying at about the same age. I'm now 41 with failed IVFs behind me and no children. I don't say this to be negative or to scare you, it's just that if I had delayed starting for a reason like this one I would be regretting it now and cursing the lost months. Hopefully it will all be much easier for you but just have a think about how you'll feel later if you're struggling to conceive after delaying.

I think it’s a strange thing to worry about and I certainly wouldn’t be delaying contraception at 36.

I had two winter babies. I quite liked it. I could stay in and do lots of feeding and napping and not very much else without any guilt…then I emerged into Spring having lost my baby weight and having cone out of the newborn stage. Always a silver lining!

I wouldn’t wait at that age. It’s utterly unpredictable, not worth planning

I had mine in winter and I found it great, when I finally was comfortable and ready to do things baby was the right age and weather was improving. I found winter cosy, snuggled with a newborn. I'd TTC anyway as you might not get pregnant straight away - unless you really, really hate the idea of it being winter

I hope you aren't finding the responses overwhelming! I'll be waiting to avoid a Christmas baby (& I'm 37...GASP). My toddler was an April (almost May) baby and it was the perfect time of year. Obviously we can't plan these things and lots of the comments make valid points, but don't be scared by your age. You aren't 46. 😅 It could take one cycle, it could take years. But being in hospital over Christmas is something I'd rather avoid!