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Pregnant after miscarriage support

14 replies

TTC5yearsx · 03/01/2023 11:58

Hi all

I wanted to start this thread for ladies who are pregnant again after miscarriage to support one another. I don’t know about you, but I am terrified.

I just got my BFP after 3 miscarriages and an ectopic which left me with only one fallopian tube. I’m about 10/11po, period due Sunday and most definitely feel pregnant but my lines are faint. I’m so scared of losing this baby and my mind is in overdrive. But today, I am pregnant ❤️

I haven’t told my partner yet as I wanted a nice solid line first to wrap up my test. It’s his birthday tomorrow so praying I get one to show - how special would that be.

Are you an anxious wreck pregnant again after loss?? Or do you have any success stories of healthy pregnancies after multiple miscarriages?

All appreciated but for now I feel lighter for saying all of that. Phew!

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Dakin · 04/01/2023 22:05

I had 2 MCs and over a year of TTC before becoming pregnant with my daughter who was born last Jan. I'm sorry to say I spent most of the pregnancy stressed and anxious because of the previous MCs and also had continual bleeding/hosp trips throughout etc etc.

It was all worth it and I found that 'today I am pregnant' mantra helped me the whole way through. It's awful that MC robs you of that giddy pregnancy planning that other women get to enjoy, but taking it day by day and looking after yourself mentally is the best thing you can do for you both. Hopefully it all goes smoothly for you from here on

TTC5yearsx · 05/01/2023 09:44

Thank you @Dakin that does help and that’s a mantra I’ve been using actually! It really does rob you doesn’t it? My EPU have given me progesterone pessaries, aspirin and folic acid so I started those yesterday at 3w 5d. Hoping it’s nice and early to have a positive impact!

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TTC5yearsx · 05/01/2023 09:44

I told my partner actually and now have a much darker line on first response - still a worrying time!

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Milamight · 05/01/2023 14:24

Hey, I'm 6 weeks pregnant after a mmc June last year and I'm so so anxious 😟 😰 its so stressful worrying all the time and I'm torn about whether I want an early scan. I think my last ever scan has traumatised me, 13+5 baby has gone. How do you cope with pregnancy after miscarriage 😩

ChloeN · 05/01/2023 20:53

@Milamight I had a mmc in July and I feel the same, but I’ve got a scan booked for Sunday, I’m so so anxious!!😫

@TTC5yearsx so sorry to hear of your multiple losses, can’t imagine how hard that’s been😭

TTC5yearsx · 06/01/2023 12:18

@Milamight @ChloeN please both let me know how you get on! I have a scan 16th January when I should be 6 weeks to check everything is in the right place. I’ve been having some really mild left sided twinges which makes me worried about ectopic but then again I get the odd one on the right too. I think what we’ve all been through makes us hyper vigilant!

I’ve been trying to tell myself each day to control what I can control - ie take my progesterone and vitamins, and relax. What will be will be. Some days are easier than others hey!

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Amethyst1985 · 09/01/2023 13:27

Thank you for creating this thread, I’ve been scrolling through this forum looking for exactly this. I need to share my story to I hope get some of the pain off my chest and know I’m not the only one out there going through this.

I have a daughter, she’s 2.5 years. Everything with that pregnancy was smooth & easy…I figured it would be the same for the next…but last year was full of so much upset and heartbreak. I fell pregnant in April 2022 and we were really excited, I told my parents and a couple of friends really early on, I just thought everything would be fine. At the dating scan (6 weeks) the lady said the heart beat was really faint and I had come in too soon, so to come back a few weeks later. I didn’t think anything of it, so went back at 8 weeks with my mum so she could share the experience. But the scan showed nothing…I had had a silent miscarriage at some point between 6-8 weeks and my body hadn’t responded as it should have. I then had to go home and break the news to my husband and a few days later undergo a D&C to clear everything out. My due date was 18 Jan 2023, I would have been 38 weeks pregnant now. As much as I tried not to think about it, I haven’t been able to make peace with this loss and let it go.

We waited a cycle before trying again and fell pregnant straight away in Aug 2022, I felt really positive about that pregnancy and again we got excited, but just 3 days after finding out I started getting crippling back pain, which left me unable to walk for nearly a week. The night the back pain finally started to ease I started bleeding. I woke in the middle of the night covered in blood. My husband and I cried ourselves to sleep that night. The following week a friend told me she was 6 weeks pregnant. I see her every week at our kids swim lessons, she’s a constant reminder of this miscarriage.

After this my husband and I got blood and other tests done. We overhauled our diets, really focused on being healthy and getting ourselves in the best shape. All the tests came back clear and we were told to try again.

I had a positive result in December 2022, it’s been 6 weeks 1 day. My husband and I don’t speak about this one, there is no excitement, no happy chatter. I don’t use the ‘P’ word, we just say ‘if it sticks’. Every day drags by and is terrifying. I delayed getting my blood tests done and had a panic attack when I was there, but it’s all come back positive. Our dating scan is in 3 days, I’m so nervous. I’m trying to prepare myself that there might not be anything there, as it might be another silent miscarriage, or maybe there will be a heartbeat but again that doesn’t mean it will still be there in a few weeks time. I stress about every cramp and ache I get - what does it mean, is something bad happening.

I feel sad and disconnected with this one, it’s the only emotions I feel I can have at this point. I don’t want to get any hopes up to just to go through disappointment and heartbreak again. If I can get to 12 weeks I think then I can begin to feel something more.

Sorry that was a long reply, but that’s my story and how I’m feeling.

usedtolovenaps · 09/01/2023 13:42

I'm anxious, even though I'm in the second trimester now. Things do get a bit easier after the 12 scan though....
I wish you all the best and keep us updated with how you feel x

ChloeN · 09/01/2023 13:57

@Amethyst1985 my scan anxiety was just like yours. I sobbed while she was getting ready to scan me just in case it had happened again, it’s such an awful feeling waiting to hear if it’s all okay😔 I very nearly cancelled my scan because it was a private one, luckily everything was perfect and baby was moving and waving which I never thought I’d get to see! I think it’s really normal to feel disconnected and anxious, you don’t want to get your hopes up and it all get taken away again. I’m hopeful once out of the first trimester I can start to feel better!

TTC5yearsx · 15/01/2023 08:21

@Amethyst1985 im so sorry to hear about your pain and losses. It really does rob us of some of the blissful excitement. It’s good to get your feelings down on paper too (or forum) which is why I created this! Wishing you all the luck in the world xx

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chasingtherainbow1 · 15/01/2023 12:24

I'm currently 29 weeks after 3 miscarriages. Although I won't ever feel like things are okay until the day baby is born, I have a bit of hope that getting this far, it could be ok. I think progesterone played a huge part in getting me this far! Wishing the best for you all x

Iusedtobedontcall · 15/01/2023 16:47

I’m currently 7 weeks after a MMC in July. I’m having a private scan next week and I’m terrified.

Katr960 · 16/01/2023 12:41

I had my 3rd miscarriage two weeks ago. Negative pregnancy test today which confirms that it’s done. My partner and I are going for a private consultation early Feb but are eager to try again and I am struggling to come to terms with having to wait for tests etc to be done before we can try again.
Nhs want me to do blood tests 12 weeks after the miscarriage and another between 1-5 days of my menstrual cycle.
I am so tempted to just start trying again and take folic acid now and aspirin but I also don’t want to regret making this decision.

TTC5yearsx · 16/01/2023 16:59

I just posted a new thread. Started spotting early hours of Saturday which has progressed to bright red and cramps. Early scan today showed nothing in my womb but a small bleed. HCG is 55. I’m roughly 5w 3d based on conception but I don’t temp, I use OPKs. Not holding much hope! Repeat bloods on Wednesday

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