IVF/ICSI over 40. In the 2WW

[Nikster8012]

Hello all,
Just wondering if anyone is doing IVF post 40 and talk experiences ??
I am in the 2WW at the moment, from egg transfer last Thursday (24/11)...
I have kids already, no problems there but wanted one more and my age I can't afford to wait so first started at London women's clinic. BUT I have rare heart condition and have pacemaker since I was a baby... Its all I have ever known so no issue for me, played tennis for Kent etc, no big deal... well, it is a big deal to clinics apparently.
Was about a grand down in tests before they told me they didn't want to do it because of heart. So back to square one. Paid again from scratch to welsh fertlity (awful service never reply to me, sont seem to care, take money and never hear from them..) london womens clinic were fab to be fair, just gutted rhey couldn't deal with me. So had to go welsh Fertility Cardiff..... took cash for tests, I chased and chased. Got results AMH was 3.8 which is normal for age, but knew that because London women's told me rhat a YEAR ago. Paid for rhem to repeat this information.
Then waited 2 hours on phone for a video appointment. They then told me they cancelled ans forgot to tell me. Fab.
This sh%t is mega stressful, expensive and emotional then to be ignored.... THEN 6 months after being absolute idiots told me they couldn't donit because they were worried about my heart. I had my consultants in London on the phone telling them I am ok, I even arranged an appointment with a specialist heart doctor specifically pregnancy heart doctor organised by my absolute goddess heart doctor at Royal Brompton who are outstanding

But, FINALLY st marys manchester took me on. Coughed up the full 6 grand, and to be fair, can't fault them. I knew it was a long shot.
Didn't respond well to stims

Wierd had 10 follicles before stims and 3 after stims with ONE 18mm.
They plucked a good egg from 18mm last Tuesday 22.11.
I gave doctor high five as I seriously gave up all hope of everything by this point.
But they got one. It fertilised. I was in shock last week.
After all this, I was on my knees. I was broken.
But they managed the one.
Transfered day 2.. looking mega healthy... so 5 days post transfer on a 2 day old egg.

I await.
Sorry to drone on.
So.... symptoms ??
Hardly any. Mega sore boobs post the trigger but they have tamed now. Still feeling full but not too bad.
Mild cramps post transfer. Standard.
As of yesterday... 4 days post transfer of two day egg I have a sudden pinch lower uterus region when move suddenly.
No symptoms really. I kinda feel in my heart it will work. I am such a positive person.
I have bad days where I feel so awful emotionally and rhat it won't work.
I am under no false impression after reading those awful stats. My xhances are so slim.
I have one egg one shot.
I can't afford another round from the start, and even if I could the chances are not improving. So yeah feel high sometimes, positive... but also pants other times too.
I am trying to be strong. After all this mucking around with different places, it's not like time is on my side...
I remain positive though. Hopeful. I feel it will work. I am deluded maybe hahaha

Thanks for listening. I doubt anyone will bother and I can't blame you haha but I needed to write my story. It feels good sharing

Xx

Thats so amazing and gives me hope!!! I truly wish you get a BFP in a few days! I am also over 40 (44) Low amh high fsh natural cycle. Still on stims but see one good follicle (dominant) and one at 7mm so it felt like a long shot but after reading your story i am hopeful! Good luck and lots of good vibes your way.

@LondonChick20 hey good to hear from you haha I just posted this aimlessly not expecting replies.
But yes. I turned 44 in October. Popped one egg and its currently sitting in there. Day 2 transfer so now I am 6 days post transfer. (Technically eggy is 8 days old).
Some days I feel mega positive!... other days not so much.
I have very mild cramps today. Feel like period coming and so emotional!
I know the odds are never great! But sod the stats, screw the stats... so I await... BEST of luck. Nice to hear someone in the same boat. Lemme know your progress, would be cool if we both prove the stats wrong hha good vibes xxx
X

I'm 41 and hopefully due to start my first ever IVF next week! Just waiting for period to come round! (Funny how I'm eagerly waiting for it now!) Im not really holding out much hope to be honest but we thought it was worth a shot because like you say you never know!
Good luck with it and I hope that one is a good one and it settles in!

@Nikster8012 Hang in there! Sorry for delayed reply.I was at the clinic all day yesterday. They are going to do the retrieval tomorrow. By the afternoon should know if it is a decent egg. For you--how many days post transfer do u wait? Have you ever tried the law of attraction? I am a huge believer and I it will definitely help you. Also, I found this great fertility mediation on youtube...I keep falling asleep to it but it has been successful according to the comments and will help you be more at ease! Really rooting for you :-)

@MuppetTime that is great! I hope it comes soon and you can start on the process. Keep us updated!

@MuppetTime hey there best of luck to you too... I think positivity and good vibes help. Keep us posted xx
@LondonChick20 hey, I have to wait unit 7th December to test so that's 13 days post transfer I think. Still waiting
What's the law of attraction ?
I am a strong believer in a few things ?? I have theories on bits and bobs too.
Oooooo tell me more xxx

@Nikster8012 law of attraction is creating your own reality. Ive had great success with it. You imagine whatbu want. Be grateful. Let it go and watch magic unfold. Ill send u some links. The most popular and what spoke to me was watching the documentary "The secret" which is also a book. How are u feeling? Had my retrieval today 2 eggs! They gonna go ahead and let them naturally fertilize and see tomorrow. I hope ur feeling ok!?

@LondonChick20 I SO believe in that. I totally do believe.
I am either very positive or not.... was crying today.
BUT! .... I visualise, imagine and SEE. I have my soul and heart voice screaming, and yet my little rational sensible voice fighting back.
Very interesting.
I used to present quiz shows on SKY. Before I auditioned, I imagined myself in the job.... FELT every aspect... then magic !!!
Interesting stuff.
Congrats on the two eggs. Sorry I actually got two as well but one was a non starter and I knew rhat would be rhe case.
I am pretty emotional.
Very emotional.
I bought an early test. Scared.
Then, I see the magic.
So kinda fighting between two minds. I remember how blessed I and am thankful, but then I feel angry and sad, then blessed and greatful.
Bit of a mess tbf hahahha
But then I always have been kooky.
Hey let me know how everything goes ?!!! I REALLY pray for you too.
It's actually really nice to know others may feel similar. It can be lonely
Big love xx

@Nikster8012 seee u have done it! U can do it again. I read a story of a lady who imagined each step (gave energy to her ovary that wasnt producing folliclesand suddenly it did. Then fertilization post retrieval. Then the implantation.) It worked for her! I am sending u so many positive vibes.

Btw im kooky too. Have positive hours then a mess then negative. All in a day haha. Thats without this process. What we are doing is mentally and physically hard. Here for u whenever you need to talk!

U have been thru a lot so far! So give yourself a break. The emotions are allowed. Vent whenever.

After your ET have u been resting ? Or normal life ? Asking as am curious for myself as they may do a day 2 as well for me.

@LondonChick20
We would totes be mates outside cyber world hahah.
I carried on as normal.... straight back to work.
Ok sorry sorry also @MuppetTime sorry this may bore you...
Thought would give some back story. I am from beckenham South East London but now live in rural West Wales! Hence why I travelled the world and paid three times to get here. I worked in TV prancing about set on quiz shows for ten years in London then when moved to Wales had twins with husband.
Then.... my parents just died. Like suddenly. BOTH.
I hit rock bottom. If you know me personally it would be wierd to see an entertainer sort full of life just suddenly disappear. My heart was failing physically and mentally and was rushed to hospital to have pacemaker changed. Had one all my life... another long story... yawn sorry sorry.
So I bought a beautiful house to rent out (inheritance... which sucked)... but I knew I didn't want to be with husband anymore. We are still best mates and I sometimes work a few shifts for him from home.
So in my bolt hole utterly depressed, unwell, know NOONE. Kids with the dad as he was being awful at the time. I was alone and unwell.
Feom being popular TV person I had nothing. No mates no family nothing.
So.... sank away to LA for a trip. Was doing some documentary thing... was OK sound glam but I was so unwell mentally. Noone could see it though.
I met Daniel my current boyfriend while I was in LA via a dating app... cool huh.
He is 12 years younger. But.... well who cares !
And here we are 4.5 years later. I turned 44 in October.
Daniel is currently looking after the kids as I type this... I am working today.
My ex is a darling friend and the kids are so beautiful and string and just amazeballs.
I am so so so blessed and lucky. So thabk ful.
But.... I haven't had it easy. I hate saying that as it seems unfair of me... but alone in Wales no friends dead family.. noone.
Horrid.
But here I am.
I do have an unrelenting positive approach. Always have been so out going happy character... I am annoyingly jovial maybe. But deep inside I hurt. I really do.
But I did guve the hospital staff high fives for getting an eggy. Hahah
Oh... now I am a fine art and wedding photographer. Xx
Thank for indulging me.
You can tell I maybe lonely haha naaaa it's cool I have Daniel and kids now... just fingers crossed for one more. I am a big kid you see!!!
Life is wierd and horrid at rimes but I am also mega thankful for being alive my wonderful babies and I am very blessed. Yeah so all good.
I am trying to visualise it all coming good for me for the magic xx

Hi @Nikster8012 wow you have been thru a LOT!
I am so sorry u have had to go through all this and that too mostly alone.
I can sympathize.
I moved to the UK last year from the USA bc I got married.
Moved in with my husband and his family. My husband is
nice but his brother has lost it and hates me since I moved in and the behavior is just harassment and banging things and just hostile. I hate it plus i can't seem to make friends here! No one has time for even a coffee! So i can understand your predicament. I hope good days are coming for us all!
Only a few more days till you 2WW is over! Have you had any other symptoms? I had my transfer yesterday.

@MuppetTime when is your treatment starting?

@LondonChick20 well you are my friend for cyber coffee haha
How manyvdays was your transfer? Well congrats getting this far.... so sorry about the family life. That sucks balls !! I sympathise.
Test tomorrow xxx

@LondonChick20 loads of cramps. No sore boobies. That stopped. Nothing really but woke up sick today.
I dunno not holding much hope... BUT I believe in magic !!!! X I do.

@Nikster8012 You are my cyber friend too! So you have kids from before so it could work! you never know :-). Did you get any spotting?

Mine was a D3 transfer 2 embryos..I was at ARGC and they grade on scale of 1-4 , 4 being best. They said 1 was a 4 and the second was a 3.5. I was shocked. For years I am being told my egg quality will be low and go for donor egg bc my AMH was low and FSH was off. And here we got good quality day 3. 7 cells and 6 cells. He said to come in for a blood test on the 17th but have to go every other day for a progesterone test and get my meds adjusted. Have u taken a home test? :-) I am really praying for youuuu

@Nikster8012 Sick as in Nauseated? Are u taking any meds?

@LondonChick20 the progesterone pessaries 2 a day.
That's all.
How ya feeling ? Xx

Ah ok...I have to take them too along with a load of other steroids...they can make you feel a bit ill. I feel good tho! Just trying to keep my mind at bay! Living "as if" its already true but then don't want a high and then a low...so trying to balance but its hard as u know! Your story si so interesting in terms of how u met your partner and your ex is a friend still..I hope u r living your best life now.....in our 40s thats all we want....

@LondonChick20 I have booked in for my day one blood test and scan for tomorrow morning! So if that all looks good I can get going! Fingers crossed!

@MuppetTime good luck!!!! Keep your head in let it flow mode but be positive. Let me rell u for years bc of my low amh and fsh levels i was told u wont have good quality eggs. From one of the top docs in denver Colorado. So i just assumed it wont work. Went in for a try but had already decided plan B was donor and got 2 eggs instead of 1 and the quality at day 3 was great! Flabbergasted.
If u need tips let me know. Argc put me on a lot of vitamins since sept to make egg quality better. They suggested to read the book "It starts wirh an egg" happy to help where i can

@LondonChick20 I'm always happy to be given tips! I'm also at ARGC but they haven't advised me any extra vitamins yet. But i have been taking impryl at the recommendation of another clinic and they said to keep that up. I also take CoQ10 and extra vitamin D. I started reading it starts with an egg but I admit I found it a bit heavy going. I have it though so maybe I should restart!
My AMH was 4.9 and FSH 8.9 last month. If all is well tomorrow I'll be on a flare protocol using meriofert and fostimon apparently.

Go in with a positive mind! I winder if we wil see each other there or have already!?

Look i was told for years. Low amh .20. Bad fsh. Cant produce more than an egg. Probbaly need to use donor. I went in thinking well let me give it a chance. I did everything they said and instead of one i vot 2 and both fertilized with a great quality! Its possible and whilst these docs are robotiv they know what they are doing ! Be happy to help anywhere i can

@MuppetTime @LondonChick20 cool. I was trying to go there but they wouldn't take me because of my heart. Noone would. What a ball ache.
Well..... its a NO for me.
Negative
I am positive though
no negative mindset here....The rules of attraction is the book called "the secret". I remain positive.
I may try again. Not too sure.
I am not sad
Just relieved it's over.
Good luck and lemme know how you both do.
Much love xx

@Nikster8012 did you do a home pregnancy test or a blood test by doc?

Well that's me out for the month. They can't start this month as I've come back positive as a carrier for cystic fibrosis so they need to test my partner now so that will delay things another month at least. No idea when I'll be able to start as my job is difficult to get time off. We shall see what happens next month now anyway.

@LondonChick20 a first response home test. Would def show if positive soni am out
@MuppetTime so sorry. Its balls. I had and will have the same because of my heart. Took a year to find somewhere who wasn't scared of me. So sorry. Xxxx