Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Original poster

Mid thirties TTC #1 - how long did it take you?

67 replies

LaVitesse2022 · 01/10/2022 15:54

Just curious for those who had your first baby in your mid-thirties, how long did it take you trying to conceive? Recently turned 34 and have been trying for around 6 months - starting to feel a bit skittish!

OP posts:
Original poster
LaVitesse2022 · 06/10/2022 13:21

@Rose785 6th or 7th cycle thereabouts. I'm also due AF on Monday! It's the first cycle I haven't been religiously tracking BBT or ovulation because I was getting too obsessed.

Are you going private for the tests? I've been inclined to give those sperm tests in Boots a go. They're not very expensive or invasive and would be an easy one to discard if all good or get help if not.

OP posts:
Rose785 · 06/10/2022 15:49

@LaVitesse2022 we luckily got a test through the NHS due to my partner having had testicular cancer and now only has one, so I think she felt sorry for me and my plea! Plus I will be 35 soon. I came off the pill last October and we were like if it happens then great but then I started tracking properly and really 'trying' from beg of March I honestly didn't believe it would take this long. My app says my period is due Sunday so I am not sure if to try and hold off testing until I am actually late. I really want to test to know but each month I have tested it has really hurt to see a negative test so think I should wait and hold onto the hope I could be! Plus the money I have already spent of tests! When are you going to test?

WandaVon · 06/10/2022 15:52

Aged 34 - first try
Aged 36 - first try (chemical)
Aged 36 - first try (currently 33wks)

MrsSamR · 06/10/2022 16:00

34 when I conceived my first - took 6 months including an ectopic pregnancy but happened in the first month of tracking cycles/using ovulation sticks etc. Before that we were just seeing what happens.

Conceived second time at 36 after 2 cycles but used ovulation sticks straight away as was impatient!

strawberryandcreams · 06/10/2022 16:28

Rose785 · 06/10/2022 15:49

@LaVitesse2022 we luckily got a test through the NHS due to my partner having had testicular cancer and now only has one, so I think she felt sorry for me and my plea! Plus I will be 35 soon. I came off the pill last October and we were like if it happens then great but then I started tracking properly and really 'trying' from beg of March I honestly didn't believe it would take this long. My app says my period is due Sunday so I am not sure if to try and hold off testing until I am actually late. I really want to test to know but each month I have tested it has really hurt to see a negative test so think I should wait and hold onto the hope I could be! Plus the money I have already spent of tests! When are you going to test?

TTC number 3 onto month 8 currently. First month for number 1, 2nd month for number 2.

Dont use the boots tests all they can give you is how many sperm and it's very inaccurate.

Pay private if you don't want to wait- about £250. They look at everything! Including movement and morphology. I also had an internal to check ovaries etc

YEN1 · 06/10/2022 16:52

I’m 36 and on month 10 of TTC #2 with DH, it took 10 months to conceive DD 12 years ago. Losing hope every month 😢

Rose785 · 06/10/2022 17:23

@YEN1 aw don't lose hope, there is always hope and every reason it will happen to you eventually! where are you in your cycle?

YEN1 · 06/10/2022 17:38

@Rose785 I am 8dpo, AF due next Wednesday. Last month it was a day late and I really got my hopes up…. then it came and slapped me on the face.

Original poster
LaVitesse2022 · 06/10/2022 18:14

@Rose785 ah that's good to have those tests earlier! But obviously the why is not good! Hope your partner is OK.

I don't want to test anymore unless AF is late. There's just no point because it's either not accurate before then or you can spot a chemical so not worth the emotional roller-coaster for me. Testing only if no AF on Monday. I usually spot a couple of days earlier so will have a sense very soon anyway I think.

@YEN1 don't lose hope! It just takes longer for some people and there's often nothing wrong with that. It does get discouraging with each new cycle, and for me the cramps just feel like a particularly cruel reminder of the failure... But 10 months is still within normal.

OP posts:
Original poster
LaVitesse2022 · 06/10/2022 18:17

@WandaVon wow that's really quick! I'm sorry about your chemical. It's so individual isn't it, some people conceive so easily, for others it takes a bit more time

OP posts:
Original poster
LaVitesse2022 · 06/10/2022 18:20

@strawberryandcreams thanks for the advice! I suppose no testing is better than a misleading one. Which is also my take on testing before AF is due! Trying to stick to that resolve.

OP posts:
mummybear2104 · 06/10/2022 18:57

First pregnancy 38 took 13 months
Second 41 7 months

Rose785 · 06/10/2022 20:16

@LaVitesse2022 I have to say I agree with you! I would rather not know if I had a chemical as its enough of a roller coaster as it is. So the heartbreak of getting your hopes up to then down would be too much for me! So will you be testing Tuesday? I think inwill teat Sunday or Monday I can't decide as sometimes I am a bit late!

Nichelette · 07/10/2022 16:43

I first conceived at 34 after over a decade on the pill. That took 13 months though I wasn't obsessing over dates. Currently pregnant at 36 with no.2 and this one took 3 months.

OceanbreezeSun · 07/10/2022 18:23

Conceived dd when I was 33, on 2nd cycle.
Started trying for no2 when I was 35 (periods were irregular after having dd but didn’t take long, took 5 months) sadly ended in miscarriage at 12 weeks. Became pregnant again nearly 4 months later, I’m currently 6 months pregnant (I’m 36).
Wishing you all the best op.

Numbat2022 · 07/10/2022 18:26

Was 36, took five months but at least one of them we didn't have sex at the right time. So more like three or four months.

RugbyGirl1 · 07/10/2022 19:39

Took 9 months for first positive test which sadly ended in an early miscarriage then a whole year (almost to the day) to get another BFP - now at 9 weeks. Was 34 when started TTC, 36 now...

Original poster
LaVitesse2022 · 08/10/2022 12:34

@Rose785 no testing for me as started spotting yesterday which means AF due within 2-3 days. Perhaps better to hold on one more day if you can to make sure it's actually late? I have my fingers crossed for you x

OP posts:
Original poster
LaVitesse2022 · 08/10/2022 12:45

Thanks everyone for sharing your experiences, and I'm sorry to those we've experienced losses x

This month's failure hit me a bit harder than usual and DP was slight alarmed when I suddenly burst into tears 😬 I blamed PMS. On a rational level I know there's nothing to worry about yet, still within perfectly normal time, etc etc, but I'm still allowing myself to feel disappointed and sad for the day. I don't think men quite understand how different the experience is for us - it's easy not to be obsessed when it's not your body that's supposed to "work"! Thank god for MN x

OP posts:
Rose785 · 09/10/2022 18:03

I cannot believe it I got my bfp! After 7 months of ttc! I am shaking and in shock as I feel the exact same as when I am due my period. Same exact pains as though it's going to start. Only tested as am a day late. Sending you all love and hope you all get bfp soon as I know posts like this can upset people and we have all been there! But posting to give others hope as it did me! X

Mid thirties TTC #1 - how long did it take you?
Original poster
LaVitesse2022 · 10/10/2022 11:31

Oh amazing news @Rose785 !!! I'm so happy for you!

How are you feeling today? Has the shock abated? It's so maddening that the symptoms of early pregnancy are so similar to PMS, it keeps us second guessing!

OP posts:
Rose785 · 10/10/2022 11:47

Thank you @LaVitesse2022 I was literally in your shoes last month on my ttc journey so know how you feel and i am still in shock as I was fully expecting another negative. I feel no different to how I do normally which makes it harder to believe!

Melusina123 · 10/10/2022 14:18

Started TTC at 35, got pregnant in active trying cycles 1 (chemical), 4 (missed miscarriage) and 7 (currently 10wks so not out of the woods yet, now 36). We avoided some cycles, making 10 full months between when we started TTC and the start of this pregnancy.

My experience (which is slightly atypical as having >1 MC is unusual) is that although falling pregnant has been fairly straightforward (getting pregnant 3 out of 7 cycles is a much higher hit-rate than they say is usual at 36), the challenges of staying pregnant also get a bit higher in your mid- late-30s. I was prepared for it to take a while, but not for the two MCs along the way, so it's worth having that in mind too.

Golaz · 10/10/2022 15:12

Conceived my first at 34 in cycle 2. At 36 started ttc my second. It took seven cycles and 37 by the time I conceived. About to start ttc no 3. 38 almost 39 😬🤞🏻🤞🏻

Original poster
LaVitesse2022 · 10/10/2022 17:00

@Rose785 that does fill me with hope that it'll happen soon to me too. Sending you best wishes for your pregnancy! x

Thank you @Melusina123, I'm sorry for your losses. It's interesting how the struggles can be different to different people. Hope it all goes well for you now x

Good luck @Golaz! I think my ideal number would also be three so I better get a move on😆

OP posts: