Conceiving without tracking

[Strategist]

We have a toddler who we conceived 1st month of trying, having 'tried' in a very active way - tracking temperature, taking ovulation tests, reading into optimal conditions for conception and following them etc. Partly because I'm type A and partly because my husband was diagnosed with a condition as a teenager which he was told would likely affect his fertility, so I assumed we would struggle.

We're thinking about trying for #2 in the next few months. Having conceived so easily first time round, it's likely we don't have any fertility issues, so I'd really like to be a lot more laid back. Having said that, I'd still like to conceive quickly if possible as we are already looking at a fairly large age gap and don't want it to be much larger. Has anyone taken a more laid back approach but still conceived as easily as when tracking ovulation? Did you have sex regularly all month or aim for the middle of your cycle? Thanks!

I tracked with my first and it took 14 months. With my second, I had my coil removed and had sex when I fancied it. I was pregnant within the first cycle.

Regular sex in a normally fertile couple is enough. Every 2-3 days is recommended.

@ShowOfHands thanks 😊

I've been wondering something similar. Definitely can't be arsed with temping and everything this time around, but I can't remember all my tips from last time! Maybe I'll make DH bang me one more time this evening and hope that covers it

No one really needs to bother with any of that shit. Just have sex, without protection, and enjoy it. Otherwise all you're actually telling each other that there's no other point in having sex at all.

Maybe try tracking your first month and then if everything is as expected you can be more relaxed (in the knowledge you ovulate on Day x etc) the following month.

@De88 some of us do have to bother with all that shit, because of irregular cycles .....

@De88 we do also have sex at other times (and I never actually tell DH when I've had a positive OPK), but it just means we (hopefully!) don't miss the key times! e.g if ovulation was going to be midweek, normally we wouldn't necessarily BD as too knackered etc, but more likely to make the effort If I know I'm going to ovulate!

I hope it goes differently for you but we had a very similar situation with our first (minus being told either of us would have issues) but it took over a year and a £500 hycosy procedure to get my second pregnancy. I don't think you can take anything for granted when it comes to fertility. Also you can always start not tracking etc and if you get lucky great, and if not maybe add some help in. Good luck.

Yep, conceived all three like that really, although I did try opks out of interest really. Took 1-2 months each time.

But the advice is still, have sex regularly as you can still get pregnant anywhere in your cycle. Although I didn't realise that- fair enough.

Just shag a lot while not using contraception. Should do its magic if you've no fertility issues.

@Dee advice is to have regular sex as it’s good for relationship, keeps a steady flow of healthy motile sperm etc. but you can absolutely not get pregnant at any time of the month.. simply not biologically correct. in a cycle there are approximately 2 to 3 days of being fertile for most women sometimes a bit more, sometimes a bit less but basically 2 or 3 days. add in any fertility issues, age issues, irregular cycles, lack of usual signs for some women like fertile stretchy cervical mucous, ovulation pain, feeling horny, existing children not sleeping, illness, shift working, etc. etc. it can be very useful for lots of women /couples to track somehow with ovulation tests or similar..

"Natural birth control" using tracking results in many an unwanted pregnancy, and there is a lot of information available that backs that up, so not a very effective way of avoiding getting pregnant. So I very unscientifically stand by my belief that pregnancy can occur anywhere in a cycle unless I see some mixed method, per reviewed and well critiqued research articles otherwise. though personally, I feel the time would be better spent just having shagging, i respect that tracking is necessary for some regardless.

@De88 natural contraception, if done correctly, is almost as effective as the pill. It's just a lot more complicated so mistakes are more likely to be made. You can only conceive if you have sex in the short window before you ovulate. If you have sex a week after you ovulate (for example) then it's physically impossible to get pregnant.

It's all well and good the advice being to have sex every 2 days throughout your cycle but at the end of the day, we have a toddler and jobs and a lot of other life stuff going on... that's never going to happen 😂 I'm going to have to aim roughly for the middle of the cycle at the very least...