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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Original poster

Do I need to stop breastfeeding to increase chances of conceiving

44 replies

MiniHouse · 19/04/2022 20:27

Hi everyone,

Trying for a 2nd. First one still feeding at 3. He actually feeds quite a lot, total between 1h30 and 3hrs over 24h period (including 2 night feeds) as a source of comfort. My periods only returned 3 months ago and are quite irregular (but always have been).
Does anyone know, have any relevant experience to what extent this feeding affects my fertility. I'm trying to gradually wean him off (with limited success), really want a 2nd child and as I'm 37 with pcos wondering if I really need him to stop feeding to boost fertility or of its unlikely to be having much affect. Studies all seem to cover effects of breastfeeding under 6 months.

Thanks everyone!!

OP posts:
Sexnotgender · 19/04/2022 20:28

I conceived first month trying, whilst still feeding 18 month old. I was 38.

Thewheelsfalloffthebus · 19/04/2022 20:41

At that age, if you’re ready to stop, just tell him the milk is all gone and offer a cup of milk during the day or water at night.

FastandLoose · 19/04/2022 20:46

Completely anecdotal, but from personal experience: eldest had one feed a day from about 18 months to 2 years and we conceived the first month after stopping having been trying for over 9 months.

secretsqizzle · 19/04/2022 20:49

One of the ways to impede fertility is to breastfeed.

It's not 100% and shouldn't be relied upon for contraception but if you actually want to conceive then it isn't helping ...

BreakfastClub80 · 19/04/2022 20:52

In theory (iirc), breastfeeding raises prolactin levels which can affect fertility. I was advised to stop breastfeeding prior to fertility treatment for a second child because of this. Many women do conceive whilst breastfeeding though sand I didn’t conceive despite stopping so it’s complicated!

PinkDaffodil2 · 19/04/2022 20:56

I needed to cut down to just once at bed time to conceive - DD was just turned 2 at the time and my cycles became regular. Cutting down will probably increase your chances.

Original poster
MiniHouse · 19/04/2022 21:08

Thanks everyone. I've tried the whole 'theres no milk', sometimes he'll reluctantly accept, other times he'll scream and be so worked up. I think cutting to two a day should be realistic.

OP posts:
littlebluetrain · 19/04/2022 21:10

Do you mean your child is feeding every 1.5-3hrs? That's very frequent for a toddler and the frequency may well be hindering ovulation.

Even just stopping the night feeds might help, as night feeding has a connection to hormone suppression / keeping up milk supply.

Full weaning or even "just" night weaning is hard but if you want to stop, you can take the lead confidently. There will probably be tears, but you can do it!

NamelessNinja · 19/04/2022 21:12

I stopped breastfeeding- and was already only down to bedtime feed, 8 months into TTC and then conceived two months later. I'd definitely been ovulating whilst breastfeeding but my cycle length shortened after I stopped so I think that was the problem.

fossilsmorefossils · 19/04/2022 21:22

Some people conceive while bf, some don't. You could cut back to something manageable and try it out for a couple of months,

LazyYogi · 19/04/2022 21:30

I've definitely heard that stopping night feeds is what brings many women's periods back. No personal experience here, my period returned as normal at 5 months and then I got pregnant while still feeding my DS at bedtimes just before 2 years old.
I have another friend who got pregnant 9 months pp with a frequent breastfeeder.
It's probably an individual thing. For some women breastfeeding may alter the hormone levels more than for others.

HannahDefoesTrenchcoat · 19/04/2022 22:18

Partial weaning might help. You should be able to find info.
At night I used to say they could have a feed when it was light outside. Easier for them in spring/summer as the nights are shorter.
In the day I would say they could when we were in pyjamas.
I’m sure you’ll work it out. For me I think they knew when I meant it and it helped to have routine and clear points in the day.

Gunpowder · 19/04/2022 22:34

There used to be a thread about it in conception, I don’t know if it’s still going! I would definitely cut the night feeds if you can (I know it’s easier said than done). Also I think if you cut down on feeds quickly rather than tapering off it’s more likely to boost your fertility. Beware though, Wink a couple of us on the old thread conceived twins and iirc there is some vague evidence to suggest breastfeeding at the time of conception increases the likelihood of multiple births. I fell pregnant with mine the month I stopped feeding DD2.

LazyYogi · 19/04/2022 22:45

I think there's a book called milkies when the sun shines? I think it's for kids to get used to being night weaned. I cringe at the title but I think it must help as it's mentioned a lot on support groups.

Rrrunrunrunrunrun · 19/04/2022 23:28

My dd is 2 this week and still feeds throughout the night and at bedtime despite my best efforts to wean. I am 23 weeks pregnant. I think bf only affects conception when you are bf a lot (ie before weaning onto solids)…

Original poster
MiniHouse · 20/04/2022 07:25

Thanks. He's feeding a total of 1.5-3 hours in 24 if I add it up. Sometimes there are big gaps, like he attends nursery 3 days 8am-5:30. But I find on his days off and weekends it can be very often like every 3 hours, sometimes long feeds.

If I refuse he can be upset or like he's devastated.

OP posts:
PaddlingLikeADuck · 20/04/2022 07:27

Purely anecdotal…..

i started trying for Baby number 2 when my current child was just under 2 years old. I was breastfeeding my first and my periods had returned when he was only 4 months old and were in a regular cycle and so I thought getting pregnant would be easy despite still breastfeeding my first.

10 months down the line and I still wasn’t pregnant (still breastfeeding my first) and so I went to see my GP. He said that in some women, breastfeeding doesn’t stop conception, but one of the hormones prevents the fertilised egg from being able to embed in the endometrium layer. He said I could have conceived every month for all we knew, but that if the fertilised egg then couldn’t implant and therefore my period would arrive, then I would have considered me not having got pregnant.

She suggested that I stop breastfeeding and see if that made a difference so I began the process of weaning.

Once my son was fully weaned I got pregnant the next month.

Like I said, it’s only anecdotal but thought I would share my story.

Dobirdseversleep · 20/04/2022 07:39

It does seem to hinder conception for some women (and then there are others who have conceived within weeks of giving birth with a demand-fed newborn; it’s not an exact science).

I think that if you have other factors affecting your fertility then it may well be even harder to conceive whilst breastfeeding. I conceived with a breastfed 15 month old, but he was down to just one feed in the early morning by then. We swapped his bedtime feed for a cup of milk, and then cereal before bed (which he is still insistent on at 8 years old). During the day I insisted on food/drink instead of feeding when he got to 12 months. The 4am feed was the last to go with both of my children.

Catcrisis · 20/04/2022 07:50

You're the parent though. If you give in to him every time he gets upset because he doesn't get what he wants, he's just going to end up very spoilt and manipulative. Breastfeeding does inhibit conception. It doesn't stop, hence people anecdotally giving examples of where it hasn't. Up to you what the decision is, but looks pretty clear to me

MabelG · 20/04/2022 08:00

@MiniHouse if you get a blood test to check your prolactin levels then it should tell you if it is high enough to be stopping you getting pregnant. I know there are examples upthread but you need to check your own levels as it could be hindering conception.

8DPWoah · 20/04/2022 08:07

FastandLoose · 19/04/2022 20:46

Completely anecdotal, but from personal experience: eldest had one feed a day from about 18 months to 2 years and we conceived the first month after stopping having been trying for over 9 months.

Similar here, was trying while still just doing bedtime and one night feed (age 12-18 months) and conceived the month after she dropped that feed. I'd been having periods and even got a couple of early positive tests but none stuck for me til that night feed went. Carried on the bedtime one til I was about 4 months pregnant though.

Original poster
MiniHouse · 20/04/2022 08:45

Thanks I like this..."beware" made me chuckle which is good as I had a difficult morning trying to explain to my little one that feed time was finished - he's very attached.

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Original poster
MiniHouse · 20/04/2022 08:51

Thanks so much everyone!! 💖😊

I think it's clear that cutting night feeds and overall feeding time is a good idea - in any case I'm getting fed up of being woken up 3 times a night with a small one attached to me.

I had some success last night in an attempt to avoid feeds between 10pm and 5am and he accepted it when I said no most times but seemed to wake up and try even more!! 😊I like the daylight idea perhaps I could use a timed nightlight to achieve that in summer.

However if I completely refused he is devastated and it meant this morning it took a ridiculous amount of time and tantrums to leave the house. ☹️

I'll look now at advice on partial weaning.

OP posts:
Original poster
MiniHouse · 20/04/2022 08:53

Thanks that's interesting. I'm also having periods and think I'm ovulating so it might also be the issue with the night feeds.

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Original poster
MiniHouse · 20/04/2022 17:04

He told me to stop reading this book because he didn't like it 😂 says it all really.

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