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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

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Original poster

How did you know you were ready to try for number 2?

17 replies

WideOpenSpaces · 25/02/2022 15:05

Just that really - how long did you leave it, and knowing what you know now would you do it the same if you could start over?

OP posts:

harriet465 · 25/02/2022 18:43

Following! I am in the same position DD is coming up 20 months, I would like a smallish gap but unsure if I would like one this small

allfurcoatnoknickers · 25/02/2022 18:49

Following! DS is 2.5 and I'm still dithering. I never wanted a small gap as I had a horrible pregnancy and didn't love the baby phase, but I also don't want a massive gap. I'm also at a tricky point in my career, which isn't helping...

Anyone have any thoughts on a 4 year age gap?

Juanbablo · 25/02/2022 19:55

Tbh I had been ready for months, it was just about waiting for dh to be ready. When ds1 was 18 months he said let's do it so we did and have a 2yr 4month gap. Then I wanted another baby straight away but we had our wedding planned so we waited until afterwards and had our 3rd child almost 4 years after the second.

Exhausted18 · 25/02/2022 20:07

There's 3 years 1 month between my 2. My first was an awful sleeper for a long time. When she finally started to sleep through I realised I needed to have the second one before I got too used to a normal amount of sleep again or else she'd be staying an only! I didn't feel ready. It worked out anyway . This one doesn't sleep either though so no more!!

ShadowPuppets · 25/02/2022 20:14

I didn’t - had a slip up with timing my cycles/when to use condoms a couple of days after DD’s first birthday and surprise, DS!

I’m due in 10 weeks - we always wanted two but I found the first 6 months with DD extremely hard and tbh if we’d had to sit down and make the calculated decision I think it would have been really hard to actually go for it!

Slightly terrified about the small (21 month) gap but I suspect that this is actually working out for the best, we almost needed to be pushed into it… plus it took us a year to conceive DD so had braced myself for another slog, so a surprise pregnancy was probably a good thing on that front too!

bogoblin · 25/02/2022 20:17

We'd started talking about it a bit more, my boyfriend was ready but I was unsure then one day I just sort of woke up and went about my day and thought about it and realised I felt ready. Like I wanted another baby as opposed to "oh I want one too". There will be about 2 years and 1 month between them

TheSmallAssassin · 25/02/2022 20:19

We didn't plan, just let nature take its course 😁
Breast fed number one, my periods didn't come back until he was about ten months, had one period, then fell pregnant.

Original poster

WideOpenSpaces · 25/02/2022 21:35

Thanks everyone nice to hear some different stories.
It seems to be quite a common thought that there's no perfect time!

OP posts:

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 25/02/2022 21:37

I wanted my mat leave to cover the last few months of my eldest daughter not being at school and then to settle her in - this for us was only a 3.3yr gap as she’s summer born. I couldn’t do 2 under 2, worked well for us. Long term I’m sure as close as you can manage is better.

Whatelsecouldibecalled · 25/02/2022 22:48

Honestly I don't know. We dithered for a bit. Knew we wanted another. We had ivf to conceive DS1. Said we would try naturally for 6 months then book into clinic as assumed we would need ivf again. Fell pregnant the first month we tried! Mental really but I honestly don't know how we finally decided.

Babyfg · 26/02/2022 00:07

I went a bit mad after my first about wanting another one. We didn't use contraception, I was breastfeeding and we didn't dtd often (maybe five times in 9months). We had decided to let nature take its course (but I rrrrreeeeaaallllyyy wanted another).

One day it hit me like a ton of brick that I was getting a bit of normality back and coping with ds well and that things were good and would I actually cope with another. Ds was 9 months.

Sat down with dh and told him all this. He agreed to wait (probably a bit glad I wasn't manic anymore). Booked an appointment for the pill.

I was already 2 weeks pregnant 🤦‍♀️

Looking back if I went on the pill I don't think I'd have ever come off it again as they'd always be a reason to wait, but I'm happy with my lot and couldn't imagine just having one now ❤️

nutmegsteddytoes · 26/02/2022 00:21

I was so in love with my newborn when he arrived that in the maternity hospital I said I was ready to go back and start treatment again(both of my children were IVF)
I had a two year gap on the end and it's been fine

girlwiththetigertattoo · 26/02/2022 01:04

Mines 3 and a very very exhausting hyperactive child. I really want a second one but I also had hg with dc so not sure I would be able to cope with hg again during second pregnancy and at the same time run after dc or put up with the shenanigans dc does day in day out because during my pregnancy with dc, I was taking everything so slowly but that won't be the case right now. I'm mid 30's now so I'm probably going to wait a couple of years until dc calms down.

Flittingaboutagain · 26/02/2022 01:15

I feel it inside. An urge to go through the wonderful newborn stage and a fear of being too old to conceive naturally if I wait. Baby is seven months. GP has encouraged another month for prolapse to respond to physio.

Chanel05 · 26/02/2022 08:25

A around 8 months pp but I'd had a very severe emcs and knew it wouldn't be the best thing for my body.

My dd is almost 18 months now and we started trying after she turned 1 - I'm on cycle 6, cd2. My daughter took 8 months to conceive and the pregnancy before that, which was a mmc also took 8 months to conceive. I just don't seem to fall pregnant quickly 🤷‍♀️. I truly thought that if it took a while to fall pregnant (and that's with all being well, no further losses), that it's be at least a year an a half between ttc and giving birth. I do however, have a fear that my emcs has messed me up!

Mummyme87 · 26/02/2022 08:39

We have 3yr 6m age gap and it’s just right. I personally think it’s important to be able to spend 1 on 1 time with each child when they’re young, so when DS2 came along his brother was in nursery 5 half days a week so I could do all the baby classes, sit in coffee shops with a small baby etc etc. Also no nappies, my eldest slept by this point and I had regained sleep time, no double buggies.

I am TTC #3 now, eldest 7.5yrs, youngest just turned 4. All kids will be in school by the time I have a baby, I’m getting sleep again and will get to enjoy a small baby all over.

Candycan · 26/02/2022 09:03

I also had a surprise pregnancy when DD was 14 months - I was terrified about the small gap which is now even smaller as DS was premature. but now I have both of them I'm so glad there is a small age gap and they will be doing things at similar times. it's tough at times trying to split my time but me and their dad take one each lol so on the sleep front atleast it's really not too bad which was my main worry as DD was so awful for sleep.

sounds stupid but you really will just know I think.

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