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Original poster

Just want to be pregnant:( after miscarriage

6 replies

Val0901 · 10/02/2022 09:01

Hi ladies,

We decided over a year ago now to try for our 3rd baby (1st 2 were straightforward easy pregnancies) found out in March we were pregnant which ended in a missed miscarriage (medical management required which was successful), fell pregnant again in Aug and devastating news in Sept that we were having another missed miscarriage. This one was alot more difficult as medical management failed, they then tried to manually remove it without pain relief which failed, I was sent home to see if it would come away natural which it never (after lots of significant and scary bleeds, one being in a public toilet), then taken back in for MVA which again failed and ending eventually in emergency D&C (which I'd asked for in the first place but they rejected due to covid... apparently). So that process took a long time, I'm now over a year since we first started trying and I have such overwhelming sadness every day at just wanting to be pregnant. I'm 12dpo today and another bfn and I'm just so fed up of feeling this sad and having such strong desire to be pregnant again... its crippling me Sad I'm not even sure why I'm writing this, maybe just to get it off my chest? Has anyone been in a similar situation and went on to have successful pregnancy? Thanks

OP posts:
Bundaberg84 · 10/02/2022 20:01

Hey@Val0901 I am so sorry for what you have been through! It's unfair and it's a sometimes lonely journey. There is a great community here, and there's a TTC after miscarriage thread if you want to join, great ladies with great support. 💐

Original poster
Val0901 · 10/02/2022 21:52

@Bundaberg84 thank you for your response. I will look into that. It is a very lonely journey!

OP posts:
headspin10 · 10/02/2022 22:18

I'm so sorry to hear this. Sad

My best friend had one baby, all very straightforward, then 3 miscarriages at around 8 weeks each time. Then went on to have two more healthy pregnancies with no problems at all. Youngest is now 4.

I really hope things work out soon for you, it's clearly been a really really hard time. Thanks

Chanel05 · 11/02/2022 06:59

I'm sorry for your losses. I had a mmc in the past with surgical management and it was awful.

It's very upsetting. When I went to the doctor, I was told any investigations would reset the 12 month clock from the miscarriage date.

waffle222 · 11/02/2022 08:04

So sorry for your losses :(

I'm feeling the same way today. I actually came scrolling looking for a thread to chat about this on. I had a misscarriage in November. I've had 3 before but also had children. I'm 11dpo today and BFN. I had a complete meltdown last night and a panic attack. I just feel I haven't deal with the trauma of my misscarriages and this want to be pregnant again is taking over me. In all honesty, I don't even know if it sensible we have a baby at this point. But I don't know how else to handle my grief.

Have you tried speaking to a counsellor. After my upset last night I think I'm going to call EPU and ask if there's someone they can refer me to. You are not alone.

Original poster
Val0901 · 11/02/2022 22:23

Thanks for your responses.
@headspin10 that's positive to hear your friend went on to have successful pregnancy after miscarriages... I was so naieve to the fact it could happen to us as we had 2 healthy pregnancies. It's just so confusing as to why its happened twice... I keep getting told by NHS staff its just bad luck Sad
@Chanel05 sorry for your loss. Its horrendous isn't it... I weirdly never even know mmc was a thing before it happened to me and never thought about the fact there needs to be management to remove the pregnancy... it was horrendous, especially 2nd time for me as it went on for months! I wish you all the luck going forward.
@waffle222 I'm sorry for your losses also. Its so hard isn't it to feel this way... its very overwhelming and consumes your day to day life. I actually did start counselling about 5 weeks ago and see her weekly... to be honest I'm not 100% sure if its helping me or not, I think it's probably made me realise how hard I am on myself and its felt good to have someone truly listen and sympathise as its such a lonely thing to go through (even with supportive husband and family). Having just written that down.. counselling probably is helping me deal with the grief but not the overwhelming NEED to be pregnant again. 12dpo for me and another BFN so I'm out this month too. I'm sending you so much luck and wishing you get that rainbow baby x

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