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Conception

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Am I going mad, can anybody see lines on these?

30 replies

Dandy0911 · 20/07/2021 18:05

I'm pretty sure. Almost certain these are negative but I'm some lights I swear I can see a tiny tiny line. It would be really really bittersweet if it was a line.

I'm 3 days late for my period. Pretty regular. I have an 8 month old DD whom I adore.

I had a very rare and aggressive type of cancer 3 years ago, and the treatment (although we didn't think at the time,) has left me infertile. My eggs are good but my insides are shot to pieces. We managed to conceive DD through IVF / ICSI but the pregnancy made me incredibly poorly. Which we also didn't know would be the case. (The treatment and surgery for my cancer is very new and very rare and I was almost a bit of a guinea pig.)

I have a 52 staple scar from my sternum to my nunnie so I've literally been cut in half, and because the pregnancy put so much strain on my scar, it was in the early stages of rupture and DD was born via section at 36 weeks as we were both in danger.

We're both here and healthy (me somewhat, with lifelong issues.)

If I were to be pregnant, on my own, it would be a miracle that I've conceived on my own. But the possibility of it making me v v poorly (plus even more scar tissue) is very high. And I would feel so selfish because I wouldn't want to not be healthy enough to devote 100% of myself to my DD.

Please no judgement. If I was pregnant I would have to have a long conversation out my surgeon, but deep down I know what the answer would be. But I'm jumping ahead of myself here as I don't think they're positive. I just wanted the lovelies of MN to tell me what they think. Are there 2 lines???

The reason I'm not on contraception also, is the chances of me become pregnant are virtually zilch. I didn't want to put myself on contraception as well as the numerous other meds I'm on. But if I am pregnant, or if I'm not but this is a scare, I'm going to have a think.

Sorry for the long post, I didn't want to drip feed.

Am I going mad, can anybody see lines on these?
OP posts:
WASHI · 21/07/2021 10:33

So glad you have your DH there to support you. What a time you’ve been through. I hope your consultant gets back to you soon. I can’t imagine anyone would judge you and if they do they’re utter idiots!! Brew Flowers

Dandy0911 · 21/07/2021 14:31

Thank you all.

I've got an appointment next Wednesday at the clinic. After long chats it's very evident I can't carry a baby now :(

Thank you for all your support. So scared.

OP posts:
Dandy0911 · 21/07/2021 15:12

This is the clear blue I did this morning. It's still very faint but definitely a line. There is a line at the top but it's very faint.

OP posts:
Dandy0911 · 21/07/2021 15:18

That's probably not the best picture. I've just dug it back out the bin and it's a bit smudgy now.

My heads everywhere :(

Sorry I keep posting. Just need to vent somewhere

OP posts:
minmooch · 21/07/2021 19:08

I'm so sorry you are facing such a heartbreaking decision. I hope you can find peace whichever way it takes you Thanks

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