TTC July (after what feels like forever)

[Speccybibliophile]

I have been looking at all of the TTC threads for a while and some of the other threads on Mumsnet but this is my first time posting.

We had planned on TTC last year but delayed our plans because of Covid but now that I have had my second vaccination, we will most likely start TTC next month. I had a difficult pregnancy last time (little one is now 4 years old) so I didn't feel comfortable to TTC with the pandemic raging.

Really I think I was emotionally and physically ready to TTC when my daughter was 2 years, so it really feels like a long journey to even get to the stage of TTC. With one thing and another we listened to our heads over our hearts and we're planning to TTC Spring 2020, until Covid hit.

Everyone around me seems to have had a lockdown baby or be expecting a new arrival in the next few months and I feel a little pang of sadness (not quite jealousy) when I think that I could have had a little baby in my arms right now, if things had been different. I suppose I feel some regret that we weren't 'braver' in going ahead TTC over the past year and a half as others around us clearly have.

I can't really talk about this with anyone in real life, so I'm hoping to find an outlet here please.

There must be others in a similar position?

*were not we're (autocorrect )

I’m in a similar position - we were planning to start TTC in April 2020, and put everything on hold for more than a year. I’m now double vaccinated, and we’re in our first month TTC #1.

I know quite a few people who’ve had babies in lockdown (though most got pregnant before the pandemic) and I do get jealous and sad sometimes. But I try to remind myself that they’ve had a really tough time of it - partners not being able to go to scans, giving birth alone, fear of catching Covid while pregnant, family not being able to meet the baby for months etc. I don’t know if I could have coped with the stress of all that, so waiting was the right decision for us, even though I wish things were different.

I think it's the whole "family planning" phrase. We think we have a plan in mind but life has other ideas. I hope that your TTC journey goes well and you have your own little bundle of joy before too long. I understand what you're saying about the difficulties everyone has had and yes on balance I agree that it was also the right decision for us. I suppose it's human nature to be wistful.

Love your username btw!

We planned to TTC this month but didn't due to some medical issues I have had- hoping to get the go ahead to TTC in my next cycle in July. I'm double vaccinated too, if all goes well will be our first baby.

I think you did totally the same as I would have done in delaying due to the pandemic. There was definitely a feel at the time that the pandemic would be very short lived (!!!) and also the requirements being made of pregnant women at the time (like no partner for scans, concerns elective caesareans would be cancelled, the list could go on).

I feel frustrated at having to delay even for a month so can imagine it was tough for you.

So excited to start TTC soon (fingers crossed I do get the go ahead in the next few weeks), DH is exasperated sometimes in listening to me already expecting a rollercoaster ahead but just trying to remain patient.

All the best to you- glad to see other people who are starting in july

It's nice to not feel so alone! Hope you get the go-ahead in the next few weeks. Completely relate to the comment about your DH- I'm trying to shield mine from my impatience and we haven't even started trying yet lol!

I'm another one lurking on the threads waiting for my turn ❤ Hoping to start TTC baby #2 from my next cycle in July. I think it is absolutely fair and sensible for you to wait until now! I had my first child in March 2020 and obviously didn't plan to give birth at the start of a pandemic. It was fine, we are doing OK now, but the first few months were an extremely challenging time and I think will impact me emotionally for the rest of my life! The worry for our newborn was something else and there are also things we will never ever get back. I think I have buried a lot of it!! As RestrictedSection said, lots of people who got pregnant at that time had difficult time too for different reasons!

I'm hoping things will be on the up for us all now, but regardless we wanted to try for a 2 year gap!! Any time from April 2022 would be lovely 😊😊

I really hope your TTC journey goes well!

Sorry to hear about your troubles @2ndTimeRound90 that sounds incredibly difficult. Have you spoken to anyone about what you've been through. Without going into details, I had some difficulties around my pregnancy and childbirth last time. When I picked up the courage to speak to my GP about it, I was able to get a referral for a birth debrief with the consultant midwife at the hospital. I have had some CBT to help with an issue that was not directly related but crept up on me around the same time. It might be worth considering.

I have my debrief notes stored away somewhere and a had a look through after my first dose of the vaccine. When I felt regretful for the delay to TTC, I think it helped in an odd way to remind me what we had been through and not minimise the journey we've been on and the reasons for take care of ourselves instead of rushing onto the next baby.

I really hope we all have a beautiful next chapter and that 2022 is our year for the arrival of new additions to our lovely little families

I'm stupidly excited that I figured out how to tag you here, you can tell I'm a newbie poster!

*for taking care of ourselves