Just need to rant - TTC is driving me insane and never ending!!!

[Theresa88]

We started TTC at the start of 2020, couldn't get pregnant until the end of 2020. I went through 15 weeks of sickness and weight gain only to have a TFMR, and have been TTC again for two cycles since then with no luck. I'm taking all the vitamins, doing everything from it starts with the egg, and trying to eat healthy which is a massive pain in the ass. Still can't lose the 5kg i gained during pregnancy so now I am fat with no baby. Also have been on the run around of fertility appointments for almost a year now, blood tests, scans, my lady parts are basically a highway with so many people prodding around down there! Plus it's expensive. I'm contemplating doing IVF as I'll be 34 in a few months so there's no time to waste, but I'm not keen to go down that path either with all the expense, stress, annoyance not to mention MORE freaking weight gain. Some days I just want to throw the towel in if having a baby is going to be this hard!!!

I'm with you .. started TTC in October, fell pregnant in November and has a miscarriage in December. Since then I've monitored it all and it's just not happening. Woke up to AF and nearly cried. It's so frustrating isn't it? My friend and coworker got pregnant at the same time and are all due in the next 4-6 weeks which rubs salt in the wound, and even my best friend who tried for 8 months is now pregnant and I'm still not. Just turned 33 here. It's so so so hard. Is this meant to be your first?

@Rtmhwales yes it's my first, and yes everyone else is pregnant around me!! I guess it will happen eventually but it's just so painful waiting every month and trying so hard to do all the right things to get pregnant!

I feel you! The first months after the miscarriage I was fairly laissez faire, oh I'll catch soon enough again, no big deal. Now I'm starting to feel bitter when I see pregnant people and friends which is unlike me. It's really rough!

Hello op. I hope u are doing fine there. I m also sharing the pain I feel for myself too. Started ttc end of year, 2019. Was over the moon when I got pregnant end of year 2020 and it happened really before our scheduled fertility appointment. End of fairytale story, I had a missed miscarriage mid of January. I thought I was okay, accepting the loss that it isnt meant to be.....just to find out that lots of people suddenly announcing their pregnancy in social media, and I decided to shut it all down for my own peace of mind. I never regret the decision anyway, feeling more free without it. Up to this day I am still struggling to be pregnant too, watching my diet in TWW hoping it will aid conception.. doing the deed religiously in fertile week, tracking the ovulation. I got my period yesterday just when I thought this cycle seemed like it. I dont know what else to do, guess I will really just leave this to happen when God says it is my turn... although I must say I almost losing my faith at this stage... I feel life is unfair because I saw people whom not wanting baby are getting it easily and us who are really for it arent getting it no matter what. And why should be me who waited like forever for my first one didnt make it while others are easily having it to their full terms. I just cant seem to make sense all these anymore. On the side note, I wanna wish op and everyone on this thread to be strong although I myself almost losing the faith. I know it's gonna happen someday perhaps when we least expect it.