Please talk me out of testing!

[Beanybob]

Hello all, this is my first post.
As background, I'm 37 and in a same sex marriage, we are TTC via donor IUI. I had our first insemination a week ago, last Wednesday. I don't think I have any fertility issues other than a slightly irregular cycle, after having had some basic tests done at the clinic, and beyond being too fat and geriatric in the eyes of the NHS (and having to go private) there's nothing on paper preventing it working...
I don't know if any of you ladies have had to take HCG injections but it is now 8 days since I had that and I feel that surely it would be out of my system now (it can cause false positives) but my wife says not to test yet and wait til 11th June as advised by the clinic (tww plus 2 days, argh!) I know she's probably right but it's driving me insane. I feel like if I see a negative test now and then try again every few days I'll feel better!
I have also been having some cramping the last couple of days and boobs are really sore, I don't know if AF is brewing or if that sort of thing can be caused by implantation? Wishful thinking I suppose as our chances on attempt 1 were always slim.
So - who here would be taking a test every few days until AF arrives, and who would wait it out??

It's totally up to you if you wa nt to test or not. Me personally, I can't handle testing early. A BFN that could potentially be a BFP, then I start reading the statistics how high the chances of a BFP would be at Xdpo and feeling down. Or I see a hint of a line and won't think about anything else until I can test again the next morning.
i need a clear answer, whatever it will be. That's why I only test after I missed my period.
That's just me though. If you can handle that, or if it even helps you in the process, go for it! But don't buy the Clear Blue ones, So many indent lines lately!
Fingers crossed 🤞

My brain says not to but I have no chill so would totally get it if you started testing now to see the trigger out.

Best would be to wait though and not mess with your head daily!

I’ve had the trigger stay in for 12-13 days before now, so if you can handle getting a BFP and watching it dwindle away and potentially not come back then go for it, but I personally would wait at least a few days longer...try to get to at least 12 days past trigger, but even then it might still register on your test! I know it’s hard but testing now really won’t tell you anything, even if it’s a BFP you can’t trust it at this stage! Good luck!!

Thank you everyone, you do speak sense... I've never been a patient person.
I think I'm just already sad and disappointed that I don't think it has worked as have had bad cramps for about 4 days now, which is surely AF and not anything good. Doesn't help that I'm not sure exactly when it's due as I'm a bit all over the place after the Provera and injections.
Perhaps I'll make a snap decision in the morning walking past the hidden tests in the bathroom!

Haha I have absolutely no patience either and hate being in a situation that I can’t control, so I know where you’re coming from!
Try not to worry about the cramps though, the medication does crazy things, and I don’t know if you have the joy of using progesterone pessaries but they can definitely cause cramps and all kinds of symptoms! If I were you, I would test early, but not this early...tww plus 2 days is almost impossible, but definitely try to hang on a little bit longer! 🤞🤞

Haha, no not been given any pessaries - they sound interesting!!
I read loads about the stresses of the 2ww before we had the IUI and very naively thought yes it would be frustrating but surely not that hard not to test early knowing it won't help....so wrong! My thought process changes every 10 mins from 'ride it out, period is due any minute anyway' to 'buy 50 cheap tests on Amazon and test twice a day!'

I know, if you have a two week holiday, or a deadline in two weeks - it’s gone in a flash, but tww is a whole different thing 😂
Full disclosure I’ve just done my first round of IVF, and my official test day is tomorrow, and I tested on Saturday...so I am in no way following my own advice! But I didn’t test until I was 12 days past trigger, so I still feel like I can say to wait a couple more days without being a complete hypocrite! I think that’s the compromise between your two options, leave it a few more days, and then POAS twice a day like a maniac! We all do it...!

Right...unless I decide otherwise again in the morning, I'm testing tomorrow, it will be 10 days past trigger so either negative or a faint line in theory...and then try again Sunday/Monday depending on outcome...excited and terrified.

Sounds like a plan...good luck!

Thank you and best of luck with the IVF too, all fingers and toes crossed!

I went for it and got a BFN, which is exactly what I wanted to see - trigger is clearly all out after 10 days so any BFP after the 2ww will actually be a positive.
OH tried to talk me out of it but once I explained that I don't feel like I have any control during this process I think she understood. It's all take these tablets for X days, inject yourself at X time for Y days, trigger shot at exactly this time, now spread your legs (again) and someone else will squirt the stuff in. Now wait and see if your period shows up, which could be anytime really now all these medications have messed you up. It was getting a bit much.
Now to decide if I test on Wednesday - which is technically 2 weeks - or Friday as the clinic advised... Probably both! That's assuming AF still hasn't shown up, although I still have cramps so probably will :(

@Beanybob you're not out until AF showed up.
Not to give you false hope, but I had cramping for a couple of days before AF was due, but it never arrived. I only tested positive 2 days after AF was due.

Thanks, that is reassuring. So hard to think sensibly atm!
I wish I knew what day it was due. After taking Provera it was supposed to arrive 11th May, but it didn't start til 15th, they only put me on that because despite being more or less regular since the start of the year, AF arrived a whole week early in April so they said they wanted to control it better. I feel like I've had an extra one somewhere along the line - so no idea when it is due! I think I'll test Wednesday just for the hell of it!

@Beanybob tell me about it. I'm pretty good at giving advise and being objective and pragmatic, but I'm a mess when it comes to take my own advise. I have that inner crazy person that pops out in those situations and makes me do stupid things, like testing at 13dpo randomly before dinner after having more than one glass of water. And then being down because of the BFN.

Oh god that's exactly the same as me, I'm the person people come to if they want to be told they're an idiot. Dread to think how neurotic I'll be if I actually do get pregnant!

Did anything come from this beanybob?