depressed and confused, ttc :(

[laurenomarixxo]

Really don’t know what’s going on with my body, at age 17 i got pregnant from a one night stand when i was a heavy drinker, party animal, smoker etc.. and eventually chose to abort for financial/ emotional reasons, and regretted it ever since, and now i’m 22 with a boyfriend, been ttc for 1 year, been tested for PCOS, negative, boyfriend has children from a past relationship. If he’s had kids before with no problem and i’ve been pregnant naturally from one encounter when i was younger, why am i struggling now? every month it’s so heartbreaking, literally take ovulation tests monthly too and dtd for fun everyday anyway, especially in fertile window.. feel like i screwed up my chance to be a mother then, and i’ll never get the chance again, feel like i’m being punished.. i just cry everyday. advice anyone? Doctors insist everything is fine and i really done know what i’m doing wrong here :S

Just a thought, and whilst unlikely it's happened here on Mumsnet before, has he had a vasectomy and hasn't told you? As I say, unlikely but especially if he's older, there's been cases of women having all kinds of tests and getting really upset when all along their dp knew what the issue was but didn't say for fear of loosing them.

The other thing, how much of a break between his kids because men can also loose fertility.

I would suggest trying not to worry because you are young, but if still not pregnant by the autumn ask your gp to start fertility investigations starting with him because it's non invasive

How long have you been trying for? Sometimes it really is luck op. Have you ever had counselling for your abortion? How long have you been with dp?

Why are you so desperate to become pregnant at 22 with a chap who already has children from a 'past relationship'?

You have a lot of young life ahead to enjoy.

I'm sorry you are still sad about your teenage abortion and I know you are not alone there but it was the right decision for you at the time and you must come to terms with it. We cannot live forever with regrets, especially about things we did when we were no more than kids. Also having a baby will not replace the one you lost.

It takes some people longer than a year to become pregnant even if they have been pregnant before. Stressing about it does not help.

@jessstan2 bit harsh

because we love eachother, are engaged and want to take that step together, normal emotion really..

@minniemoocher my boyfriend is even more excited than me to try to start a family with me so i doubt he had that done haha but thanks for the kind advice :) just feels heartbreaking

I didn't mean to be harsh with you, laureo and certainly not offence. I was 22 once too!

How old is your fiance and how old are his children? Please ignore if you don't want to say, I will not mind.