New to TTC. What was the most useful things you’ve learnt since you’ve started?

[Veronika13]

Hi everyone, I am 34 and cycle 1 trying to conceive. I am so excited that I’ve finally started this journey. I’m on the way to become a mum :)
I most likely have PCOS (AHM is 70 ) but my cycles are v regular at 28 days, and just did my 21 day bloods and got told I I ovulated this month. I’m def out and we started trying after day 14 (my ovulation).

Just wondering: what do I need to know? What do I need to .... do? Apart from sex I have been tracking periods but that’s it. There is SO much info, so many new terms and abbreviations. What was the most useful facts and information for you, since you’ve started ?

Any advice for a new ‘trier’ would be really appreciated

Hi,
Not sure how much help I can offer, as I am going through Fertility treatment rather than conventional TCC but thought I would offer some reassurance.

I also have high AMH, I am 31 about the same number as you, regular cycles and ovulate. My consultant at a private fertility clinic is not concerned about PCOS, and is sure I just have a high ovarian reserve. I am also a normal weight, no other symptoms of PCOS. So if it's just the AMH level leading you to believe you havePCOS, that may not be the case. Also the lack of regular ovulation is one of the main issues regarding conception of PCOS.

I would get yourself some cheap opk off Amazon.

If you drink a lot of caffeine I would also try to decrease this, maybe add some low or caffeine free drinks. I drink a lot of caffeine and get headaches if I don't, so I have started cutting down caffeine.

Also start taking folic acid and vit d if you aren't already.

Good luck

Sorry for my ignorance, do you know why you need treatment if everything is supposedly working? Did you try for a long time before you knew you needed treatment? Hope you respond to it soon , have my fingers crossed for you ❤️

Thanks for the coffee advise, I actually drink 3 a day so need to stop it :) and just googled what okp is - thank you so much I’ll order some now!

@Veronika13 Hey! I don't have any advice when it comes to PCOS but the main thing I would say is maybe try using OPK's to help detect ovulation as this can differ each month and apps aren't usually that accurate (in my experience). I'm a mum to a nearly 2 year little boy, I fell pregnant within my first cycle with him. I'm now TTC baby #2 and this is my third cycle, currently in the TWW (two week wait). My cycles have differed by a few days in Jan & Feb (Jan being longer and Feb being 6 days shorter) so I have a feeling I was missing my FW (fertile window). This is my first month of using OPK's. I started off with One Step strips - got these from - eBay and Amazon sell them too. They're super cheap which is good if you want to test a couple of times each day. The only thing for me, I found it stressful trying to interpret the lines on them. I did cave and buy the Clear Blue OPK's (pink one) and this gives you a static smiley when you have reached peak. I started using those at the same time as the strips. Got my peak last Friday so now just waiting.
Start taking Folic acid if you haven't already. I didn't do this with first baby until my midwife told me to so I was a little concerned as she explained I should've been actively taking them when I knew that we were TTC... I'm taking them this time around though.
I think there are other things that ladies take too but I'm not too clued up on those.

Good luck for TTC!!! xx

@Veronika13 I don't have a partner so need to use a donor/fertility treatment. It's a long wait ...

Thanks @SingleTTC31 , I was actually considering that when I was single few years ago. I looked at the positives and liked the idea of not having to answer to a partner (esp if we separated) in any decisions about the kid - if I want to move overseas with a kid, if I don’t want an ex to introduce the kid to his new gf after 2 months, etc. I do salut you for doing it alone. X

Thanks @Confused678866
And sorry if TMI, but do I really need these OKP tests if we dtd every day (in rare instances - every other day)?

I’d say tracking periods isn’t really that useful or helpful. It’s tracking ovulation that is the key.

@Veronika13 DTD every day or every other day throughout your cycle will definitely cover everything.. I think it's just that lots of ladies like to know that they are getting their LH surge on their OPK's and that ovulation should be close. Something I've never done is temperature readings (which actually confirms ovulation) and that way, people know exactly how many DPO they are when it comes to testing etc.
I can see that you're using the Flo app - I use this too. Just because it's predicting ovulation on a particular date, it doesn't mean that's correct. Ovulation can fluctuate every month even if you're cycles are regular. These are all things that I've come across while trying for baby number 2! xx

@Veronika13 if you're DTD every other day or every day then it sounds like you've pretty much got yourself covered on that front! ☺️
I echo everything previous person said. Cut down on caffeine, exercise regularly but don't over do it, folic acid and vit d.

I like to have an idea of when I'm close to ovulation so I use the clear blue OPK's, probably just because I'm a bit of a control freak.

Good luck x

I recommend OPK and the Premom app to help track. You might be DTD every day at the mo but if you don't conceive straight away you might find a a day off every now and then a welcome breather! I've heard it said that every other day is better for sperm quality too but I've not looked into it so don't take that as gospel.

Agree about taking a conception vitamin too. I really like the Seven Seas ones as they are tiny but have what you need in them. Quite often on 3 for 2 at Boots and they are good enough for you to keep taking after a BFP too so they are dual purpose!

Oh and if you do use OPK don't make the mistake I did (I think with both pregnancies if I remember correctly ) and forget that when you get a peak on an OPK you still need to keep DTD. For some reason I relied on doing it in the run-up to peak rather than straight after. I'm sure we'd have conceived this pregnancy quicker if I'd had that lightbulb moment a month or two before.

Have sex every other day and take folic acid. That's all you need to do! Anything else can lead to getting obsessive, take the fun out of it and mKe it stressful which is counter productive! Remember it can take over a year for perfectly fertile couples to conceive and it doesn't necessarily mean anything is wrong. Luck and patience are big players in TTC!

Obviously If it's taking longer then of course start looking into opk's, tracking etc but I wouldn't do that from the start. Good luck!

Yep this is my ovulation app!

Dtd definitely every other day as a minimum (WFH and no kids yet - plenty of free time ) so I think maybe I’ll hold off the okp tests just for now.... my high AHM levels (70) can unnerve me a bit so I’m trying to keep cool about everything. But then feels like I’m not doing enough , only dtd?! As in, that I should be doing something else.

Interestingly GP told me to stop taking anything with vitamin A in it - so ‘no’ to my daily multivitamin, and retinol face cream.

OPKs are much more useful than tracking apps for helping you know when you ovulate. If you’re up for having sex every 2 days throughout then tracking ovulation probably doesn’t matter, but if like me that just isn’t going to work for you, then OPKs are great for helping you to know when to time it.

Sorry, didn’t read your update before I posted. If you’re having sex every other day and taking your folic acid then you don’t really need to worry about doing anything else. Just relax and go with it. Good luck!

@Veronika13 anything with vit a or retinols are not recommended when TTC, I think they can cause complications or defects in pregnancy, can't remember exactly why we aren't supposed to take them.

You could do fertility yoga or meditation if it would make you feel like you are doing something?

You've probably read this numerous times but try not to take it too seriously for at least the first 3-6 months if you've not conceived by then. Ttc can be all consuming!

A friend said to me just before I started ttc that it took her two years to fall pregnant with her first child. Totally fine fertility wise, just that's how things went for her! My words to her were, "No, I can't wait two years.". I scoffed. It was 27 months between my first month ttc and giving birth to my dd.

@tulips87 sorry to jump in here but I’m just wondering, how much is overdoing it with exercise? I exercise 5 days a week for around 40 mins and it’s usually HIIT, that’s not too much/too intense is it? Would hate to think it’s affecting my conceiving! 😊

It took us 21/2 years to get pregnant and finally it happened naturally. COVID prevented us from getting started with IVF. I reduced caffeine, ate fertility boosting foods, reduced alcohol and tracked ovulation. I wish I'd been more relaxed at times as it was stressful. You hear this a lot and I always doubted it but we conceived when I was relaxed about it all and didn't put so much pressure on myself. Good luck and be kind to yourself and your partner. It's not wavy when your TTC journey is long

@StaceyWS88 sorry what I meant was if you're new to exercise don't over do it, don't suddenly start doing 5 days a week hiit as it could throw your cycle off and affect your AF.
If your cycles are regular while you're working out then you're fine :)

My personal best tips:

If you are easily disappointed, don’t test early, you’ll save money and hopes on potential chemicals and BFN tests

I love OPKs waaaaaay more than tracking BBT, it was easier for me personally

Seek help and talk to those around you if you miscarry. I’m a talker, I love talk it out and cry, it makes moving forward easier for me. After both my miscarriages I sought help and support from those around me and the lovely individuals here on MN!

Try to be relaxed about conceiving, some fall right away and others like me take over a year, everyone is different and getting to focused on others just makes me anxious haha

Good luck in your TTC journey and hopefully I’ll see you in a thread on here ✨

Has anyone’s male partner also struggled with patience to conceive, and you would notice slight disappointment (not with you of course - but with Mother Nature!) when it was another wait yet for another month?
I know we say we bombard them with ovulation and they stare at us blankly, but I mentioned to mine that my period is due next week and he was quiet. I think I realised he’s human too and is also on this journey with me, and has feelings of ‘ok, not thing month then ‘ same as I do..

Thank you @gingerglitter4ever I am a talker too and almost told my mum and best friend that we’ve are trying, but glad I didn’t - I’d feel like when I speak to them they’re waiting for me to announce it. Just don’t need additional pressure.

Thanks everyone, keep drilling to myself to relax for the first few months and have low expectations. I used to read these boards and feel envious of you guys that you are trying. I desperately wanted to be one too, to be calculating ovulation and dtd days and even having disappointment at AF
I am just glad that I’ve started this journey, means I’ve taken the first steps to become a mum as I was worried partner might want to wait longer before trying. X

I'm also 34 and ttc cycle #1, it's exciting and also overwhelming isn't it! Good luck to you!