DTD Advice

[QuirkyRobin]

Just wanted some advice/wondered what other ladies' views and experiences are with this.

This will be our 3rd cycle ttc, however we weren't really going for it the first two months (more of a 'let's see what happens' kind of approach). So really I suppose this is more like the first time round as a serious attempt. However DH said that he didn't want to start too early with things like bbt/opks and I agreed because I can become quite obsessive and I felt like that probably wasn't a great way to start off, seeing as this could take a while (save some of the crazy for later right?)

Anyway, bearing in mind that I really don't know when I ovulate, I just wondered for those of you out there that have/had this approach how long you dtd for throughout the month?

We've gone for an 'every other day' approach, but honestly it's the most sex we've ever had in a month and I'm not sure we can keep it up for months on end! (no pun intended haha!)

I'm on cd19 today (dtd 8, 10, 11, 13, 15, 17 and more than likely later today!) and since I came off the pill in Oct 2019 my cycles evened out to 31 days. However I was very irregular before I went on the pill in 2010 and the last couple of months I've started to range anywhere from 26/29/31 days.

After all my rambling, I guess what I'm really asking is: how much longer do I need to keep having sex for this month? At what point does it become very unlikely that it's going to make any difference even if ovulation is fairly late? And also, for those of you that have tried opks - did it relieve some of the anxiety/pressure or just make it worse?

Thanks in advance!

I'd say BBT is quite intense, as you need to do it every day as soon as you wake up, at the same time. So this means setting alarms at weekends etc.

Cheap OPKs can also be quite intense! As you might need to test 3 or 4 times per day and still miss your 'peak'!

I'd try out the clearblue advanced digital ovulation tests. You pee on a stick once per day from around CD8-10 depending on your cycle length, and can stop when you hit a peak. Once you've done that a couple of months, you'll know roughly when your peak is and see if it's regular?

I'm ovulating anywhere from CD19-CD23 over the past 6 months. Some people are much earlier though! It just depends.

Totally feel you that every other day for the full month is pretty intense!!

If your longest cycle is 31 days then the likelihood is you’d ovulate between CD15 and CD21, on your shortest of 26 days it’d likely be CD10 and CD16

So you could probably do EOD between CD10 and CD21 and you’d be covered but I do find the Clearblue advanced digital OPKs (dual hormone) really take the hassle out of it and allows you to focus on several days before and around ovulation :) they are pricey but definitely worth it, pregnant month 2 then month 1 of using them!

Good luck! X

@Amz6219 My cycle is 31 days and ovulation varies from CD19-23. So think while you can give a rough idea of ovulation, it really just depends on the person 🤷🏻‍♀️

Do completely agree though that the CB advanced ovulation tests take the guesswork out and might save stress longer term!

If you are looking for an option that doesn't require alot of input there are apps you can use to track your cycle that will give an estimate (emphasis on that word) of the days you are likely to ovulate.

These aren't an exact science by any means. Generally there's only a fertile window of about 5 days in each cycle. Some women see a little more using opks and some a little less.

So if you want a starting point the apps are good and then if after a few months you find you are still trying you could get the cb digital and be able to time things a bit better =)

My cycles are usually between 27 and 31 days but had the odd weird one (a 24 and a few 33/34 day ones). We planned to try and stick to the 2-3 days idea, started around cd8 and lost motivation after cd14. There was only one more time on cd19. I was convinced I ovulated around day 15-17ish so wasn't holding out much hope (it was only the first month but I was already over thinking about how it could become an obsession if it took a long time 😂). Anyway, I found out I'm pregnant on Saturday (cd25 for me)! 😊

Even based on a 31 day cycle, you're probably covered if you stop nowish I'd have thought!

Thanks so much ladies - was not expecting any responses that quick so that was a really lovely surprise! It's just so nice to hear from other people and air my concerns/frustrations to someone other than DH - I think I'm driving him round the twist already!!

@crabette thanks for sharing! This was what I was worried about - I could be that cd23er and all my romping would be for naught if I stopped now totally get that everyone is different but it's reassuring to read about other people's experiences.

@Amz6219 the price was definitely another factor that I'd been considering. What's the best deal out there/place to pick them up? I'm such a tight arse!

@IndaFlowers I've been using Flo for the last year or so just to track my periods as I was worried once I came off the pill that they'd go back to being monstrously irregular (which I'm terrified they may well be on their way to doing!) I've been vaguely aware of the fertile days that it shows up but since they've started to change length I was a bit worried about the accuracy since like you say you can only really know how long each cycle is once AF lands.

Congrats @Wils301 ! Good to hear a success story! Maybe we've caught it already, who knows?!

I suppose it won't hurt to keep going til the end of the week to get us to cd23/24 this month. Like you ladies say though, if this is going to continue for a while then long term perhaps I should go for the cb digitals - I'm absolutely knackered already!!

@QuirkyRobin Thank you! Fingers crossed for you 🤞

Another vote for CB OPK.
We don't generally DTD much these days (older!) so I wanted less pressure on both of us. I just test in loo first thing and don't even mention it to him unless it's fertile window, so he's got a 'heads up' which works better for us. Then you usually have a 2-5 days within which to choose to DTD for a good chance. I feel the cost is worth my peace of mind that we gave it the best try we could each month by getting the timing right.

I have added the App Clue for the last two years to see where I was in my cycle and log everything. Is a good app and very accurate being off the pill.