TTC - have reached the one year mark :(

[Lene88]

Have now officially been ttc for one year. Trying to stay positive but starting to worry it’s never going to happen. I’m now 32 (33 in 3 months). The more time goes on and the older I get I know the less chance there is.
Timing intercourse every month around ovulation. No success yet again this month!!
Any advice or positive stories would be greatly appreciated...

I may just have to come to terms with a childless life but I’ve never had any other plan. Don’t know what my life will be without my own family :’(

Sorry to hear this.

Is there anyway you could get a fertility MOT? It might help to put your mind at ease.

How are you confirming ovulation? I ask because when I paid for a private sonographer, she told me I had ovulated the day before which was day 12. I had never previously got a positive OPK on day 12 so I assumed she was in the wrong. 14 days later my period arrived, so she was right! It really put me off OPKs for a while. Out bodies don't always ovulate when we think it should.

Best of luck, I hope 2021 will be the year for you.

You’re thinking worse case scenario OP which is highly unlikely.

Time to book a Dr’s appointment if you haven’t already. Also, if you can afford to pay for private fertility tests (about £500 all in I think for you both) then defo book that in for the new year, it can hopefully put your mind at ease or get the ball rolling quicker if there are any problems.

Thank you. I’m currently using OPKs and keeping an eye on the other ‘signs’ of ovulation. Have been thinking about seeing a doctor but with all the recent overwhelm on the NHS I’m holding back. But at some point this year I think a fertility test is needed if I have no more luck! Appreciate the responses x

It took us 14 cycles to conceive. Worst year of my life! All my tests came back fine, DH never got his sperm analysis due to it being cancelled. Honestly I think it’s pretty much pot luck each month. The month we conceived it was the first ever month not using OPKs and I went for a spa weekend and had plenty to drink. Don’t want to advocate the whole “relax and it will happen” theory as there was nothing more frustrating than hearing that myself, but it may have worked for me in the end. I would definitely recommend seeing your GP to get the ball rolling with some tests (I got mine done ridiculously quick even throughout lockdown) and it helped with my stress knowing there wasn’t something wrong (with me at least). Sperm analysis is quite cheap (£120+) in comparison to the female tests so private is always an option. Good luck OP x

It took us 14 months to conceive our first and im 31, we started fertility investigations at the 12 month mark and we were both checked, i was getting my day 21 bloods done (day 23 for me as irregular periods) on our 14th cycle of trying had the bloods done and 4 days later found out i was pregnant. It really is just pot luck every cycle but never give up faith and dont beat yourself up about it, i gave myself the worst time during those 14 cycles blaming myself for not trying when i was younger or i must not be doing enough, it will happen for you 🥰

We've just had our referral through for NHS testing as we've been trying for nearly 2 years now 😞 I'm so gutted, really hoping we're one of those couples who gets their appointment through and then gets pregnant in the meantime.

It's awful isn't it, my cycles are very irregular so it makes timing DTD quite difficult - my doctor recommended not using OPKs so we never have, I'm not sure if we should have now just to be sure of timing.

I'm 32 (33 next month) as well and am on cycle 13. I'd recommend getting the ball rolling on your fertility tests as you'll be kicking yourself if you leave it - I started mine in July due to a family history of early menopause and it took 5 months to have it all done - with a referral booked in 6 months after that. And the referral is only really the start of it!

Thank you to everyone who has responded for sharing your stories, they’ve given me hope and made me feel less alone in it all. Here’s hoping for sone good news at some point in 2021 🤞

Thanks for this advice. I definitely need to get on it!

@Lene88 you're definitely not alone! I am 33 yrs old, we've been trying for 2 years now. We've had all fertility tests and we're both healthy! Most average couples take 18 months to conceive (the fertility nurse said it)... it's really about right time and luck...so fingers crossed that 2021 will be ours and your year!

@Lene88 you sound like you could be me. I've been trying since January, I'm also 32 and turn 33 in March. We've been trying for our first but also not went for any tests because it was always still less than a year and with the pandemic this year I didn't feel comfortable going to the GP for what seems like a non essential appointment, you know? Absolutely gutted it's taking this long though I was hoping and naively believed I'd have 2 babies before I was 35. Not happening now! Surely we will have some luck soon 🤞

I'd definitely advise going to your GP and getting things going with tests now.

I have to go down the IVF route - initially went to GP in Oct 2019 and with tests, Covid, waiting lists etc we are due to start IVF in February 2021. (NHS times)

Thanks for the good advice and also the positivity in these responses. It’s so easy to feel like you’re the only one and that there is something wrong with you. Thank you for being so reassuring. Hopefully one way or another that bfp with arrive eventually x