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Original poster

TTC after MMC

8 replies

molsxox · 08/12/2020 15:39

Hiya guys im coming on here for abit of reassurance really..

I had a MMC in July, found out at 5w5d on a private scan were I should of been 7w6d, the NHS then left me till I was 11w3d and I passed it naturally. Most horrific experience ever. I was booked in for D+C when I would of been 12w
Emotionally, mentally im still very upset with what I went through.
In November we decided to start trying again, this is my first cycle and im CD16, 3DPO, my hubby has bought us early pregnancy tests so I can test around 11DPO but as you can imagine the excitement isn't there, we want a baby so badly, im beyond terrified that this will happen again.

We have spoken about going for another private scan around 8w, although the first time caused a lot of upset and anxiety being told it was only 5w5d and no hb, if I hadn't of gone for that, I would of been so close to my 12w scan before bleeding.

Does anyone have any recommendations for coping with TTC after a MMC ?

Im very stressed out at work atm aswell due to COVID and working in a hospital with redeployment so I feel like all this pregnancy stress is on the verge of tipping me on the edge.

Would like to hear some positive stories for some reassurance !

OP posts:
vitaminb33 · 08/12/2020 21:34

Hi @molsxox - I came across your post and felt I should say something as I'm in a similar position. I personally can only empathise and not really provide reassurance as my MMC was just a few weeks ago, I found out at 11 weeks that the pregnancy had stopped at 9 weeks. I really suffered from having to wait for 3 days before I could have the MVA procedure so I can't imagine what waiting that long must have been like for you, I'm so sorry. Your feelings are completely valid, it's a unique and appalling form of torture.

However! As no-one else posted and I've been doing the same thing as you, if you haven't seen already there is an old thread on TTC after a MMC, here's the link to one of them: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/3961076-Starting-TTC-again-after-missed-miscarriage-part-two. It's very long, you can even go back to the first thread, and while this might seem a bit strange it really helped me to read through it from the beginning and follow the experiences of the women posting. It's not really around at the moment because nearly all of the women on it are now pregnant (at various stages) so they've moved over to the pregnancy forum (and and as far as I know, they've all had healthy pregnancies so far). Again, it's a bit strange but reading these threads helped reassure me!

J785948 · 08/12/2020 21:45

Hi both - there is a live TTC after MC group full of people (like me) in your situation. It's really helpful to talk to others and share experiences. Will try and add the link

J785948 · 08/12/2020 21:51

Let me know if you can both access it ok. I am really sorry for your losses. It's literally the worst thing to have to go through xx

vitaminb33 · 08/12/2020 22:12

Oh thank you @J785948! I haven't really posted anything on mumsnet yet but I might join in now, I think it might be helpful. Hopefully see @molsxox there :)

J785948 · 08/12/2020 22:16

@molsxox I hadn't until about 2 weeks ago. I was a bit worried it would make me more anxious and stressed about everything but I think it has really helped me so far. It's nice to speak to other people who are in a similar situation, particularly when it's hard to find family and friends who really know what your going through!

X

J785948 · 08/12/2020 22:16

Sorry @vitaminb33 - I used the wrong tag! Lol

Chanel05 · 09/12/2020 16:26

@molsxox sorry to hear of your mmc Thanks.

I had one in April 2019 and had surgical management at 12 weeks. I was very stressed/depressed as I was desperate to be pregnant before the due date in November and thought I'd surely be pregnant by then. I wasn't. But afterwards, I felt a sense of relief. I fell pregnant with my now 12 week old DD the following month.

I'm not going to lie, I was anxious the whole way through my pregnancy; each trimester came with its own challenges. In my first trimester I had a scan at 7 and 10 weeks and had a panic attack at the 7 because I was terrified of hearing bad news. Then the second trimester meant I had the anomaly scan to face, the biggie and alone because of COVID. All was well thankfully. Then it was movements - have I felt enough? Finally, third trimester, almost there and hoping the last weeks/ months and birth would be fine. I thought I'd be relaxed when she was born but actually, I now realise that being a mum is the start a lifetime of worryingGrin. However, there is life and hope and happiness after a mmc and I hope it comes to you soon. I'd go through it all again for my dd if I had to and I felt like she was just waiting for the right time for me to become her mummy. Your baby is waiting for you too. Best of luck and I hope 2021 brings you the baby you long for.

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