What do i do?

[Beleeve]

I'm having a bad day today. I've been off the pill about 18months and although haven't been trying the whole time have probably had around 9 or 10 failed attempts at getting pregnant.

This isn't my first child so i thought it would be plain sailing but i was totally wrong. I've written on other threads that my luteal phase is too short, around 7-8 days. I'm taking all the vitamins i've read about but it makes no difference. I feel like every month we try but really what's the point?!! I'm also 35 so feel like time isn't on my side.

No one knows that we're trying so i can't really talk to anyone else so someone please tell me what do i do now? Keep going like this, give up on ever having another child, call the doctors?? If i do what the hell do i say, they're not going to care about my screwed up cycle are they?

I suspected months ago i might have low progestotone so asked for a blood test. They did it and said all was fine but they didn't even ask where i was in my cycle so i already feel like i've been fobbed off.

I know people who are going through much worse than me trying to get pregnant the first time, am i being selfish for even wanting this?! Please someone tell me what to do cos i can't keep feeling like this every month!!

Hey, I'm sorry you're feeling this way :( It's a horrible journey to be on when it isn't happening as fast as you'd like.

Can you speak to a different doctor? I switched doctors a while ago because the one I'd had since childhood made me feel like an inconvenience. I moved surgeries and my new doctor is absolutely wonderful, always takes time to really listen and provides advice - even when it's not front of my mind! I went for migraine medication and said I'd been getting them since I came off the pill, he asked me if we were TTC and within five minutes my appointment had gone from migraines to discussing how to get the best kind of sperm!

Honestly, there are brilliant doctors out there, and it sounds like you've got a pants one. Look around your different local GP surgeries - or otherwise, can you afford to look into it privately?

@Beleeve hi, so sorry you feel this way. Was your progesterone test done around 7 days after ovulation? Could you ask for a copy of the results to work out for yourself if it actually was normal for post O? Assuming it was done after ovulation that is.

I too have a short LP after stopping the pill 8 months ago, and have been TTC since then. There's another thread called short luteal phase gang on here, it's inactive now, but I went through all the posts and a few people did go private. One person I recall specifically get prescribed progesterone privately and caught the first month on progesterone.

I looked into going private to have investigations done and the initial cost was about £400 for tests, and then hopefully if it's a straight forward fix like a progesterone prescription then surely that wouldn't cost too much more on top. As you've been TTC more than 12 months though, can't you get a referral on the NHS, or is that not an option as you already have a child/children? x

Thank you both for replying.

I think i'll try my doctors again tomorrow and see what they suggest. I don't think i could live with myself if i didn't at least try.

I know where i was in my cycle when i had the blood test. I was on day 1 of my first bleed (i tend to have a few days of light bleeding/spotting followed by a dry day or 2 and then my proper bleed which starts off heavy and sometimes painful) So maybe they could look at my results again with that information and analyze it properly.

I really appreciate the responses, think i just needed to vent. When my period started today i felt like i wanted to scream and without no one knowing we're trying i didn't really know where to turn. So thank you

Oh it sucks going through it alone. What’s stopping you talking to a friend? Sometimes it’s nice to have somebody who just gets why you’re feeling awful once a month. Since our loss I’ve made no secret of TTC, I talk to my boss about it, my mum, my friends - it’s just so much easier to go “oh I’m on the tww so no booze unless my period arrives!” There’s no pressure either - everyone wants it for us, but at the same time they understand the heartbreak. It’s nice to be able to surprise people but i do wonder if it is worth the loneliness? Obviously - personal choice and now I’ve had it both ways!

Yeah i totally get where you're coming from and yeaterday i definitely felt like i wanted to talk to someone about it. There is someone close to me who is going through fertility problems at the moment, and i mean proper ones which makes my issue seem pathetic. So i think i feel guilty about even saying i want anothet baby when they're going through so much.

I rang the doctors this morning and they're going to call me back today. I actually feel nervous like i'm going to be told off lol I'm not the kind of person to ring the doctors for nothing so i keep thinking he's going to say 'we're in the middle of a bloody pandemic don't you know'

Hopefully something good comes out of it, i'll keep you updated.

I have just spoken to the nicest doctor ever! I was welling up at the end cos i apaologized for wasting his time and he said not to be silly and was just so lovely about it.

Cut a long story short he's putting me on the waiting list to see a specialist. He said for younger people the waiting list can be around 12 months (!!) but will be quicker for me as i'm older. It's surprised me a bit but i already feel better knowing i've started the process.

He said they don't look into that much detail with the bloods (where i am with my cycle etc) and that would be what the specialists would be intersted in.

I guess i just keep trying until i hear something now and keep everything crossed!!

There you go! I'm so glad you spoke to somebody caring today. Honestly, just knowing that the ball is rolling will be like a weight off your shoulders.

Keep trying and sending lots of luck your way x