Late loss and then possible CP - what’s going on!

[AugustLove]

Hi,
Last month our little girl was born sleeping at 19 weeks. Needless to say it’s been a horrific few weeks and my heart will forever be broken but I’m just so desperate to be pregnant again. Not to replace her in any way, she will always be my third baby, I just have this (Perhaps unrealistic) need to be pregnant again.

So on 03/09 I was starting to recognise the familiar early pregnancy feelings for me which are painful breasts, dizziness and a First Response confirmed a pregnancy. I did two further tests within a week and the lines failed to develop much and eventually I started bleeding. I can only assume this was a chemical pregnancy? Yesterday I did my last pregnancy test just to check it was negative and there is a faint line still. Would that be the remains of the hormones still? I bled quite heavily for three days then it just stopped.

I’m also feeling low as my husband doesn’t want to try this month, he says my body needs time to recover. Annoyingly I think he’s right, I just can’t help but think it’s a ‘wasted’ month and I’m no closer to a pregnancy. I haven’t even told him about the likely chemical pregnancy I just felt like what’s the point, it’s happened now!!

I guess the point of this post is to see if anyone else still got a very faint line after a very heavy bleed? If so what did it mean for you? Any do we think it’s true that fertility is increased after miscarriage?

Thanks for reading. Xs.

Hi August Love,

I'm sorry for your loss... did you have a a negative test between the loss of your little girl and the new positive test at all? It can take weeks for HCG to leave the body after a late loss. I had one at 14 weeks and I bled on and off for a many weeks and it took another procedure to remove rpoc and then another week to stop bleeding and get a negative test. What I'm trying to say is that it might not have been a chemical but that your body is still healing from the birth of your angel.

Hi @NoCallerID,

Thanks for your reply and I’m so sorry to hear about your loss as well, I hope you’re doing ok?

I asked if I should do a test after having her and they said no as it seemed like the placenta all came away so there was no need. Maybe I should have done one just to know where I am! I think you’re right and my body is still healing, it’s just such a rollercoaster and I hate the uncertainty of it all.

Xs

I am so so sorry you're going through this. I lost my boy at 16 weeks 5 months ago.

I had no retained products, placenta came out easily. And it took 6 or 7 weeks of faint lines to get a negative test. And 10 weeks in total before I started ovulating. It's very likely the HCG is still in your system, and your body is healing slowly. Trust it! It knows what it's doing. I found that hard but now I understand I deserved to heal over time.

My body showed signs of ovulation and fertile CM throughout the first 10 weeks but it was my hormones settling down.

My bleeding also lasted 10 weeks and then first cycle was strange but all was OK (I was scanned regularly). It can just take time.

@AugustLove I was told to do a test about 3 weeks later, the hospital even gave me some. I did several over time to see if they were decreasing. I too was told my placenta came away complete and after two further scans due to continued heavy bleeding and clots it was confirmed that there was still product left so I had an MVA. I know what it feels like when you think your body isn't doing what it's supposed to, it's tough. Eventually I stopped bleeding and then ovulated 3 weeks later - confirmed by temping. Fell pregnant, had a chemical, then two more in the following cycles.... so it's possible either way but since you're still early on so it's more likely hcg from your loss. I asked several consultants I had seen whether we could try again straight away or should wait, all of them said it's ok to try again and I wish they had told me to give it a few cycles to recover. It's just crushing my soul....Sending you lots of love... xx

Hi @Livingmagicallyagain,

You’re right, I just need to trust my body and not get ahead of myself. It’s just so hard going through the weeks thinking ‘ I should be X weeks pregnant now’. Did it get any easier? I’m sorry to hear about your little boy, it’s the cruelest blow to pass the magic 12 weeks and for it all to go so terribly wrong.

Thanks for your comments, they are very helpful. My sickness was horrific with her pregnancy so I’m sure there was a lot of hormones racing around, makes sense that they will take a while to leave !! Xs

Oh @NoCallerID what a tough time you are having, sending love and I hope it all works out for you very soon, I really do. Here to chat if you ever need to.

I feel like I should make the most of the whole ‘your more fertile after a loss etc’ but in reality maybe that pushes us to try again before our bodies are truly ready?? I don’t know, it’s so hard to know what is the best thing to do is, especially when the head and heart can pull us in very different directions.

Thanks again for your reply, I feel a lot clearer about things compared to this morning and it’s good to hear of others experiences (although I obviously wish none of us were going through this in the first place!) it’s just hard to talk to people in real life without getting upset still.
Xs.