TTC #1 stress.. please help :(

[ttc97]

Hi lovelies, I'm really hoping you guys can help..

For context: I had my implant removed on 4th August and AF arrived on 31st August - so almost 4 weeks to the date of removal.

My partner and I are TTC baby number one.

I am trying to track this cycle on my FLO app, and it is telling me that I will be due to ovulate on Sunday (13th Sept) so I am currently in my fertile stages..

I am trying to track ovulation using both OPK's and clear blue ovulation tests but I'm not seeming to get any kind of positive results at all.. I thought maybe as I near ovulation my OPK's would become darker by the day but maybe I've got that completely wrong.. I'm new to this 😂😂

We DTD yesterday and used PRE-SEED as I've seen loads of amazing stories and reviews on the product.. so thought why not! Well let's just say it was a disaster 😂😩

I used 3g of the lubricant as per the leaflet recommends, and without being rude, it was literally just a slippery mess! 😂😅

I went numb almost immediately and couldn't feel anything whatsoever, and OH had a really, really hard time finishing.. we got there in the end but it resulted in really strained and un-enjoyable sex which I was really hoping we can avoid on this TTC journey.. it's really important to me that TTC remains fun and enjoyable and not pressured!

Fast forward to this morning, and OH is feeling incredibly down and upset. I ask what is wrong and he says he feels last night he really disappointed me and that it didn't go to plan at all. Although it didn't quite work as we hoped, he hasn't disappointed me at all and I'm still feeling positive and optimistic, but I know that he's beginning to feel pressured and stressed about TTC.

He knows I'm in my fertile window and maybe that's what's stressing him out?! I don't know.. I don't know what to do now to try and ease him and make it fun like usual.

I also don't want to give up on the PRE-SEED! It's quite costly and I believe it really has made a difference for so many people.. if it's our shot at pregnancy I really want to continue with it.

I guess I just wanted somewhere to vent! I don't want this to become the pattern in our TTC journey each cycle - we are generally a really happy and content couple and so it would be awful if this were to change that..

Has anybody been through anything similar?! I suppose I'm just needing a hand to hold through this 💕

I've not been through this specifically but have spent quite a bit of time on these boards so hopefully can give you a little bit of support.

I think it's important to be aware that you're not definitely entering your fertile period. This is only your second cycle post-implant removal so it's impossible to know when you'll ovulate/how regular you'll be. Your app is assuming a standard 28-day cycle with ovulation on day 14, but it could be completely wrong. You'll know what is normal for you after a few cycles of tracking (if you're not already pregnant of course... )

Your OPKs should darken over time until they peak, but that could happen over a period of 24 hours or equally over several days.

With respect to the preseed, I've not used it but it sounds like you should use the amount that feels right to you and go from there. It sounds like you probably used more than you needed to. Perhaps try 1g (or even none) next time and then increase it from there?

Good luck with everything fingers crossed for you.

I just wanted to add, unless you have reason to believe you will have fertility issues or have other reasons that you need to get pregnant as quickly as possible it does sound like you're maybe going 110% with TTC. It may be a marathon, not a sprint. I appreciate that from the moment we decide we want a baby it's hard not to go in 110% and I don't honestly believe our partners can ever understand how it feels at the end of each cycle if you don't see a BFP.

But... it does sound like your OH is feeling the pressure...
he says he feels last night he really disappointed me and that it didn't go to plan at all

If tracking/supplements/preseed etc is causing a negative impact for him then you probably need to weigh up (as a couple) whether the potential fertility benefits outweigh the potential negatives. It may be a better approach to aim to just have fun DTD regularly throughout the month. Every other day (if possible) should give you a very good chance of falling pregnant.

@Curiosity101 thanks so much, I think that's exactly what I needed 🥰

It's definitely so easy to get caught up in the world of TTC - the last thing I want to happen is for OH to feel pressured / uncomfortable at any stage.. I know he wants this just as much as I do but I don't want TTC to cause stress!!

Thank you so much - we will see how we go and take each day at a time! X

Hello, just wanted to offer you some advice from a fellow implant user/remover! I had my implant removed on 10th July and had a “period” the following week, and then another one 5 weeks later. For that first cycle I was using the Flo app, and inputting daily to help give it more accurate data. I went by what it suggested, but a month on and 3 weeks into my next cycle, I can now see/understand how out its predictions were. I definitely wasn’t in my fertile week when it suggested and though I’m not actively trying to conceive yet, if I was it would’ve have been quite misleading.

This month I know when I ovulated (very obvious symptoms for the first time in a long time and OPK’s helped confirm) and can tell this is definitely my first proper cycle since the implant was removed where everything seems to be happening as it should.

So my advice is that for the first few cycles at least post implant removal, relax a little, try not to use the app info as gospel (it’s really an estimate based mostly on little or unreliable data if you’re an implant user) and let your body regulate. Enjoy it whilst you can limit the pressure, and since you might not be 100% sure when your fertile week is, just enjoy some frequent good sex!

Good luck with your TTC journey