Dr refusing fertility assistance as I'm still BF

[1940s]

My periods returned when I was EBF my 6 month old (first baby is 26 months old now)

I've had fairly regular cycles 30-41 days long and use OPKs and temperature check every month and see from that data set that I am ovulating.

But after a long time we're still not pregnant.

I breastfeed maybe once a day for a short feed and Dr said that it's definitely that which is stopping me falling pregnant and is refusing to help until I stop breastfeeding.

Surely the fact it looks like I'm ovulating is enough? She also said 'in Africa breastfeeding is a contraception'?! Lots and lots of women get pregnant if breastfeeding and their periods have returned!

Anyone faced similar feedback?

Can you still BF if you take fertility assistance? If you'd have to stop to do that anyway, I can see why it would be worth trying.

Very silly comment about Africa.

I don't think the comments from your doctor we're very reasonable at all. But I do wonder how much they'd be willing to do anyway. If you're UK based they often aren't interested if you already have children.

What assistance/tests are you looking for? I'm wondering if it'd be possible to go privately if you know what checks you'd like?

Well I had IVF to have my 16mo DD and my Dr has said I have to be 3 months clear of breastfeeding before we can do another cycle. The hormones involved do affect fertility apparently. So I suspect they wouldn't offer you any treatment, not sure about the tests though.

You could ask for metformin which is safe while breastfeeding. Sometimes it can be all you need (it was for me)
I fell pregnant with my third while still bf my second.

In my area you don't get any fertility assistance if either of you have children already.

Breastfeeding could possibly be a factor in you not getting pregnant, but not definitely. Have you looked at Kelly mom website , lots of info there.kellymom.com/ages/older-infant/fertility/

I got pregnant while breastfeeding at around 19 months. Are you definitely having sex At the time?
If you go down the ivf route, you will need to stop breastfeeding because of the drugs you have to take.

Also you would have to fund your own ivf as you already have a child.

My issue isn't necessarily wanting the NHS to find IVF but to help investigate why I'm not falling pregnant. She was very flippant in that 'you're not ovulating when breastfeeding' yet I've used OPKs and temperature tracking for a year and every month points to me ovulating each month.

I'm also happy if necessary to stop breastfeeding if any hormonal treatment needs to take place. But I felt very dismissed that 'there's no point doing anything until you've completely stopped breastfeeding'

Also I have no idea what assistance could be offered (and fully aware ivf will be paid for by me)

@[AUTO]d3jqakcn9qlt2 would that include hormone balancing drugs and things like Clomid? Or are you just referring to IVF

@EdwardCullensBiteOnTheSide I will take a look at metformin and see if I can suggest that.

I tried for years for my first. When it came time for number 2 we tried for a few months while I was still breastfeeding. I'd got my cycles back at 6 weeks pp and was ovulating. When after a few months nothing had happened, I stopped breastfeeding and I got pregnant a couple of cycles later. I have no idea whether stopping breastfeeding helped, but in your situation, I'd just stop and see

Your child is over 2 now so why don’t you stop bf and see if it helps? It seems a very obvious first step! Silly comment from the doctor but they do have a point!

Why would you need to take clomid if you're sure you are ovulating? I can only really speak from my own experience but it would be good if you had realistic expectations of what will be available on the NHS. Besides some basic 'investigations', scans for obvious physical problems, blood tests and maybe hormone tests to check thyroid function etc they won't be able to do very much. Every Trust is different but I doubt you would get anything further. If you can afford to go private, and are expecting to anyway, maybe just start now.

You'd only be offered basic testing on the NHS as having a child already makes you ineligible for IVF on the NHS

Breastfeeding has been used as a form of contraception for millennia it's just thats it's not 100% effective. So as ignorant as the GPs comment is there is an element of truth to it

I'd stop the breastfeeding and see what happens. OPKS and temping can only confirm a change in hormones in preparation for ovulation not that you actually have.

@ivfdreaming does a shift in temperature after a posituvevOPK not indicate ovulation? Or can temps rise and no ovulation have taken place?

OP in the nicest possible way, as much as you want a child we’re still in a pandemic. People aren’t having cancer operations and people aren’t having IVF for their first child.

Normally yes you might be investigated but someone who has a child still breastfeeding isn’t going to be top priory sadly at the moment when people are suffering from lack of medical care. I’m sure if you want to go down the private route and have an appointment you can maybe now but not NHS.

@1940s

No you can have the signs of ovulation but unless you are having follicle tracking ultrasounds to confirm an egg is released there is no way of knowing for certain

I fell pregnant within 2 months of stopping breastfeeding of that helps.

@beestrees I do appreciate that perspective and realise that certainly I'm in a super fortunate healthy position.

I think my frustration is that the Dr seemed so dismissive and that ultimately finishing breastfeeding isn't something I wanted to do as a step one. I would have appreciated an in depth conversation about my cycle, my history and how infertility assistance may even be processed as I already have a child. Making the first call to the Dr after waiting over a year was a pretty tough thing to do and she didn't explain why I may be lower priority or what else may come if finishing breastfeeding doesn't result in a pregnancy.

Was this an NHS GP?

If so, their answer makes complete sense. They don’t have time to explain what could happen in various different scenarios that might not happen in future, and why would they waste time and resources investigating something when the answer is most likely to be something that the patient has already told them and is easily rectified?

Your expectations are unrealistic on the NHS, a private doctor will give you the time and attention you want.

You can be ovulating but still not have the right hormone regulation for correct womb lining/implantation. I know 3 women who had the same issue as you and didn't manage to get pregnant till they completely stopped breastfeeding.

@NailsNeedDoing is this from personal experience or you just reasoning that I shouldn't expect a consultative approach from speaking to my NHS GP?

@1940s are you from the UK? Have you had much experience with GPs in UK? Just that the type of discussion you anticipated doesn't sound realistic. I am sure there are lots of great GPs out there who would take this kind of time and care. But most won't/can't.

I think to be honest at this time given the circumstances the OP is very low on the priority list with GPs hence why she has had the response she has had given that she already has a young child (and wouldn't get IVF) and continues to breastfeed which is a well known inhibitor to falling pregnant again. It's impossible to get a face to face doctor appointment at the moment even for serious illness

Even private IVF clinics where you are paying for a service are likely to have the same advice - stop breastfeeding and then come back if there is no change since no clinic will offer treatment whilst breastfeeding anyway