Will I be able to conceive worries and doubts. TTC for the 1st time

[MrsJ6921]

Hi all,

My Fiancé and I are getting married next September and are planning on TTC straightaway. However, I have massive doubts that I’ll be able to conceive.

For context - I started my period when I was 9 years old - I’m now 23 and will be 24 when we get married. I’m also not on any contraception and haven’t been for 5 years (previous to this I was on and off the pill due to middle pains for two years) due to its negative effects on my mental health and we go ‘natural’ - occasionally he DTD inside but I’ve never had a pregnancy scare/been caught as such.

I’m quite nervous that my egg quality is already starting to decline due to the age of which I started my period and alongside never falling pregnant due to the lack on contraception kinda scares me that I’m not able to fall pregnant. I totally understand we haven’t been actively TTC so the chances are very slim so far that I would fall pregnant but even so I am worried.

Does anyone else have ‘the fear’ that it won’t happen to them? I would love to be a mum to complete our family but it’s such a pressuring time.

Thank you - E x

Didn't want to read and run. Eggs are already in our ovaries before we are born, so the time you start your periods won't impact their age or quality. You are still young (it's only mums that are 35+ which are considered older mums and the vast majority still get pregnant/have healthy babies at this age). 3 months before starting to conceive you should try to take a Folic Acid vitamin supplement, as this does improve egg quality (and you continue to take it in the first few months as it helps prevent certain spinal abnormalities in the first few months of pregnancy).

I was the same with contraception; used pills for no more than 6 months to a year, but as they greatly impacted my mental health, I stopped and have just used condoms since. This means you have an advantage to some ladies as your cycles are already regular the moment you want to TTC, so you don't have to wait months to have "normal" cycles again, like lots of women who have had to come off contraception pills to conceive.

I wouldn't be concerned by not falling pregnant when you've only been having infrequent unprotected sex - as you said, even for people actively trying around their fertile week, it still can take a long time to conceive if the egg and sperm just don't bump into each other. Most couples conceive within a year, if there's no underlying issues. I was pretty overweight when I conceived my little one - took 13 months, with a few months not really trying in the middle. It was tough, but if you prepare for the long haul - at least a year - then if it happens quicker, it'll be a wonderful surprise. If it doesn't, most GPs will be able to discuss fertility issues with you if you've been trying unsuccessfully for 12 months.

Hope that helps a little and good luck TTC :-)