TTC - third baby after long gap

[Sapphire387]

Hello all,

Backstory - I have two DC, DS9 and DD7. I was widowed in 2015 when they were 4 and 2.

Been lucky enough to meet a wonderful man - well actually he is a very long term friend and we finally got together properly a couple of years back. He and DS and DD get on really well.

We are 34 (me) and 39 (him) and we were supposed to be married last Friday but you know... lockdown. We’ve decided to get on with TTC no 3 (his no 1, biologically speaking, but he doesn’t think like that). This will be the first month and I am excited and slightly nervous.

Part of me thinks I am utterly crazy for disrupting our lives, I know all too well the chaos of a new baby. But also the joy. I love this man, I feel blessed to have been given a second chance after the loss of my late husband, and I’ve had enough hints from DS and DD about a new brother or sister to make me think what the hell, we’re not getting any younger. I’d love to be able to bring another child into this world, with another man that I love, and without that devastating loss... I know there are no guarantees but life is for living.

Sending lots of love and luck to everyone TTC 💐

And anyone who has experience of another child after a big gap, please let me know!

Not myself so to speak but I was 9 and my brother was 7 when my parents had a happy accident that was my younger sister 😂 so from a slightly different perspective, I absolutely love the age gap between me and her. My parents no doubt found it tricky at times but as we all got older it was a lot easier, I was babysitting and they 'got their life back' if you like a lot earlier than they did with me and my brother, thanks to our help. She is now almost 17 and she is absolutely my little best mate. I remember being over the moon when she told me she was pregnant and I think I was a lovely age to be able to help with certain things! I don't remember ever feeling like our lives as children were disrupted despite the fact she was a total surprise baby.
You seem like you're in a good place so why not

I mean over the moon when DM told me she was pregnant, not my sister... ha

I have 4 kids. Dd1 from my first marriage. Dd2 was born 9years later, followed by dd3 17m later. They're now 19, 10 and 9 and DS was born last summer. The gap was longer than expected as it took 19m to conceive. He's absolutely adored. Oh and I'm 40.