TTC - Covid19

[Kyoyo]

Hello,

We had a missed miscarriage in February, however I have recently had my first cycle since the surgery. We are wanting to try again but given the current circumstances we don’t think it’s the best time.

What are your opinions on conceiving during this pandemic?

We're still trying regardless, nothing is certain either way and ultimately a baby is what we want regardless of circumstances. We're lucky our jobs are secure, and I know if we didn't try then my mind would of gone into overdrive thinking we could of got a BFP :) if I had lost my job we definitely wouldn't of kept trying x

There have been a few threads about this, OP, and it got a bit ugly.

Ultimately, it's nobody's business but yours. However, having had DS 5 years ago, and being pregnant again now, there are a few things I would say, especially as this would be your first pregnancy:

1 - You will not get the same level of antenatal care. That is a fact. Many appointments are now being cancelled or scheduled by telephone. It's not bad care, but it's less than you would like to feel reassured - the midwife usually checks for the heartbeat at 16 weeks, those appointments are now by telephone.

2 - Currently, partners are not allowed to attend appointments or scans. It's such a special thing to share with your partner, and is something that you will not be able to get back.

3 - You may not have a choice on how you give birth. Many midwife units have been closed, and home births cancelled, due to lack of staff.

4 - Currently, partners are only allowed in the hospital while you are labouring, and have to leave when you are transferred to the postnatal ward. If you need a C-section, this could be up to 3 days. (There are also reports of women having to give birth without their partners, though I can't say how true these are.)

5 - There's always a risk you (or your baby) could catch CV while in the hospital. (I appreciate this may not be relevant in 9 months)

6 - We don't know what will happen in 9 months: CV could resurge in the winter months and we might have to go into lockdown again. That would mean no weigh in clinics for baby, no baby groups to keep you sane, no going for long walks to get them to sleep.

7 - Don't underestimate how stir crazy you can go stuck in the house with a baby. Being able to just nip to the shops/a friend's can be a lifesaver.

8 - Don't underestimate how much you will want for everyone to see how amazing this little creature that you created is, and marvel at them. It's hard to show them off when you can't leave the house!

These are just a few of the things I am worried about. If I wasn't already pregnant, I personally would not be ttc at the moment.

Fwiw - I had a MMC in my first pregnancy as well, so I can well imagine how you are feeling. If you were my sister/friend, I would be saying the same things.

If you have time on your side, you will enjoy pregnancy and your baby's early days so much more in a year or so when all of this has passed.

We're still trying. I'm 35 this year and have had 2 chemical pregnancies in 4 cycles of ttc, so realistically I may not conceive for another 6+ months (or ever). Covid-19 could spike every single year from now on. There's no way of knowing. Because of our ages I really don't feel we can stop trying for 12-18 months.

Luckily we don't live in a city and we're both working from home (I work from home anyway). I would probably feel differently if I had a job where I was still coming into contact with people.

We’re trying still. After 18 months I’m not stopping now