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Trigger alert miscarriage advice, please

27 replies

Whyhaveidonethis · 02/03/2020 17:19

Sorry I'm not sure where to post this. I'm a bit of a mess. I had what I thought was my 4th CP, only I never bled afterwards. Saw GP, on 21st Feb as hadn't passed it, he said to go back if I hadn't bled after another week. Saw a gynaecologist for a recurrent miscarriage appointment which has been booked for months on Wednesday, he said, don't worry, you will bleed, and gave me a pot to take a sample in when I did pass the loss.

On Friday I had a bit of black blood loss but not loads, then I was in the shower and that I can only describe as the gestational sac fell out of me. I managed to stop it washing away and put it in a pot. I wish I had taken a picture of it but it looked like a placenta with a short umbilical and then a sac with a small white bean inside it. I had been told if I passed anything to take it to the hospital for testing so I put it in the sample pot I had been given and took to the antenatal ward, which was where the gynaecologist had told me to take it. They said I needed to take it to delivery suite, delivery suite told me I needed to go to A&E, at which point I just sobbed. They took pity on me and took it and said they'd send it for samples.

The thing is I'm still not bleeding. Since Friday I've had a tiny bit of brown spotting and that's it. At the same time, for the past 9 days I have been severely ill. I've had uncontrollable diarrhoea, a temperature and stomach cramps along with a temperature. I didn't mention it to the gynaecologist as I actually didn't think they were related and I felt a bit better that morning.

So I just saw the GP who took a temperature from the top of my ear (rather than in ear as it's meant to be), and told me that I'm probably just low as I've had a miscarriage and that you don't always bleed when you have a miscarriage as there is nothing to come out?! Apparently I will bleed in 6 weeks or so?! Am I wrong for thinking that is crazy? I said to him, I feel so ill, I'm worried it's an incomplete miscarriage and he said, well did you do another pregnancy test? And I said yes and he said, oh well if that was negative the miscarriage is complete. I said, so if I only bleed when there is something to come out, why do I have a period every month to which he said the lining of your womb needs to leave. But apparently it doesn't when you miscarry according to him?

I don't know what to do. I honestly used all my strength to get to the GP and I feel like just sobbing. Actually I am. I don't feel like I've been taken seriously, I don't understand what is happening and I'm scared.

OP posts:
Foreverblowingbubbles18 · 02/03/2020 17:26

You poor thing that sounds awful. If I were you I'd maybe call 111 and explain your situation. I've never heard of a bleedless miscarriage in my life- as you said why do we have periods then. Definitely don't leave it- don't want it to cause any issues for the future x

BuffaloCauliflower · 02/03/2020 17:27

I’m so sorry this is happening to you. You are right to be worried. I would go to A&E at a hospital with an early pregnancy unit, they should be able to do a scan and advise you better.

Whyhaveidonethis · 02/03/2020 17:48

Thanks for your replies, @Foreverblowingbubbles18 neither have I. I am so frustrated. I'm 90% sure that I probably have an unrelated virus on top of a mmc, but that doesn't explain why I'm not bleeding.

I can't really go to A&E as I am pretty uncontrollable withe diarrhoea. I mean, I had to drive 10 minutes to the chemist's yesterday to get my 3rd packet of immodium and Buscopan and I shit myself. Literally. I didn't make it home. I've never felt this unwell in my life.

OP posts:
Jeds55 · 02/03/2020 23:58

This sounds so awful and just not right at all. I have never heard of a bloodless mc. I second going to an EPU so that you can be scanned. I've had 2 mmc and both times there were bits left inside me (once after surgery and once after the tablets). Bleeding restarted 3 weeks after the surgery out of the blue with my first mmc. I was rescanned and lots left inside. The doctor told me I could have been very unwell with an infection due to the bits left inside. It sounds like this is what you could have. Please contact your EPU, or as pp says telephone 111 tonight and explain the situation- you sound very unwell and need to be taken seriously. I wasn't listened to with my second mmc where I lept bleeding really heavily on and off for weeks after the tablets. I kept phoning the EPU and suspected remaining products . I ended up being blue lighted to hospital and having severe anemia and migraines due to blood loss, again there were products remaining. I can't help but suspect that if men went through this the after care would be so much better. It is emotionally and physically draining.
I hope you feel better soon

Whyhaveidonethis · 03/03/2020 12:45

@Jeds55 thank you for your message. I just don't know what to do. I'm still not bleeding, apart from occasional brown spotting. I'm not able to self refer to EPU, the only way is by going via my GP or A&E, I really don't feel well enough to go to A&E and my GP (or the locum) won't refer me. He just says if the pregnancy test is now negative then it's all gone. Clearly this isn't true as I had a negative test for over a week before I lost the gestational sac and that was definitely still inside me.

I just want to sit here and cry. If I felt better I'd pay for a private scan but I just have no idea how I would make it there. My DP is away and I'm struggling to make any decisions which is very unlike me

OP posts:
Jeds55 · 03/03/2020 13:49

@Whyhaveidonethis how about ringing 111 - they can have a GP ring you back and, I believe, refer you to EPU. As you say it is simply not true that a negative test means it's all gone - I had a negative test 10 days after my first surgery, over a week after that lots more came out and a scan the next day showed lots still in there. Or tey to get a phone consultation / appointment with a different GP from your surgery. With a mc the mental side is often overlooked but it is so mentally draining not knowing what is going on with your body/having no control over it.

Whyhaveidonethis · 03/03/2020 14:02

It really is miserable. I might try the 111 service again, but last time they told me to go to A&E. Maybe that is because it was the weekend. God knows. I don't even know how I'm going to find out the results of my sample that I took in, as my GP accidentally referred me to a normal gynaecology clinic, not the recurrent miscarriage one and so I'm between clinics.

OP posts:
Unsureursula · 03/03/2020 14:06

Hello, so sorry for what’s happening to you. I also think you should call 111, explain you’re alone and not able to get yourself to hospital. I really think you need medical help right now. I’ll be thinking of you

Foreverblowingbubbles18 · 03/03/2020 19:03

@Whyhaveidonethis how are you? X

Puddlelane123 · 03/03/2020 19:11

How are you? I would be really concerned about sepsis given your symptoms and really hope you have sought medical help. Hugs for you at a horrible time

argueifnecessary · 03/03/2020 19:13

OP, I hope you went to get checked out. My friend had that and it meant she had quite a severe infection and had to have a D&C at the hospital plus intravenous antibiotics.

Whyhaveidonethis · 03/03/2020 19:39

Hi all, I'm still not bleeding but I haven't been to see another GP. I have seen the same GP twice now and he won't take me seriously and I just feel Kind of like I'm being unreasonable to be worried. Which is ridiculous, as I know I'm not.

I'm sure I don't have sepsis. I'm actually a HCP so I know what to look out for, but I'm on a low threshold for seeking help if I think it is developing into that. Ridiculously I kind of keep thinking if that happens they may take me seriously.

I tried to ring the local EPU for advice but no one answered and I can't just turn up there.

I am going to see if I can get a GP appointment with a different GP tomorrow I think

OP posts:
CheekyMango · 03/03/2020 19:39

Write all your symptoms and thoughts down about what you think is happening to you. It will save you saying it over and over, take yourself and notes to A&E xxx

Whyhaveidonethis · 03/03/2020 20:35

I just can't. The doctor has made me feel stupid and i cat shake it off. He's made me feel hysterical, like I shouldn't be taken seriously. I couldn't bear to sit in A&E for hours for them to tell me to just go home and wait it out.

I feel like I'm going crazy. I'm normally the most confident person and I feel incapacitated.

OP posts:
CheekyMango · 03/03/2020 20:47

In which case @Whyhaveidonethis it's more important you do write things down including your GP not treating you with respect and also when you are better you make a formal complaint.
You'll kick yourself if you don't do what you can. Your health matters not the opinion of a twit in a suit or bobbly cardigan with a god complex. Xx

WaitrosesCheapestVodka · 03/03/2020 20:48

I'd go to EPU and press for a scan for closure. Personally I'd fib and say I'm cramping, but I appreciate that's not the decent thing to do right approach for everyone.

Miscarriages can be reabsorbed by the body, resulting in very little bleeding. From the Miscarriage Associations leaflet:

'The bleeding
may go on for 2-3 weeks; or the small
pregnancy sac in the womb may be
reabsorbed without much bleeding at
all. It can be very difficult to predict
exactly what will happen and when.'

Mammyofasuperbaby · 03/03/2020 20:58

I'm so sorry for your loss op, but you need to go to a & e asap. I know the go made you feel like shit but I'm concerned that you may have a uterine infection and you need to be seen.
I've had 2 miscarriages in 6 months, one of which was a mmc. I hemmoraged due to retained products and they were very concerned as I had diarrhoea as well.

Foreverblowingbubbles18 · 07/03/2020 18:01

@Whyhaveidonethis how are you now? Xx

Whyhaveidonethis · 07/03/2020 19:39

@Foreverblowingbubbles18 I've finally just started bleeding heavily. At least I know it's the beginning of the end

OP posts:
Jeds55 · 08/03/2020 07:07

I hope you're ok @Whyhaveidonethis

Whyhaveidonethis · 08/03/2020 19:52

Hi @Jeds55 well I had a heavy burst of blood at 1900 yesterday after sex and it stopped within an hour. I've no idea what is going on.

I've just got my follow up appointment at the miscarriage clinic... Its in June!!!! June 😭

OP posts:
Jeds55 · 08/03/2020 21:50

Sorry to hear that you still have no definite answers @Whyhaveidonethis Glad your partner is now home with you.
June is such a long time away but good that you have an appointment to work towards, hopefully you will get some answers

Whyhaveidonethis · 12/03/2020 11:31

Hi all. Just to update: I bled for a couple of hours last Saturday and then it stopped. This morning I've started bleeding again slightly but not heavily.

I just got a phone call from the hospital who need to see me tomorrow morning in EPAC. They didn't say why, just that the Professor had requested I attend ASAP. I'm assuming it's to do with the sample that I took in of the gestational sac.

OP posts:
argueifnecessary · 12/03/2020 18:12

Keep us posted, OP. Sending you strength

Jeds55 · 12/03/2020 19:52

@Whyhaveidonethis I hope you get some answers tomorrow and some sort of resolution to this, will be thinking of you. You've been through such a lot, look after yourself physically and mentally